Chances are, if you’re reading this post, someone has once said something along these lines to you: “You’re way too sensitive! Relax!” But are you actually too sensitive, or are they just the ones being dramatic? It can be hard to know. Psychologist Dr. Elaine Aron has coined the term High Sensitive Person and has written many books on the subject, as well as an online test anyone can take. She states that once you understand your sensitivity, you’re able to make changes in your life that can make things easier on you and the people around you. It’s not healthy to get completely thrown off by off-the-cuff remarks people make or innocuous text messages. That’s just exhausting for you and the people around you. Perspective can help you be less sensitive to the things people around you say.
I’m proud to be a sensitive person, but I’ve worked hard to not take everything personally. Through therapy, I’ve learned that most of the things that other people do are a reflection of them and not me. When I make everything about yours truly, I’m shouldering a lot of pain and self loathing that prevents me from living my best life. I want to be confident enough that someone could say something completely awful to me and I wouldn’t have an emotional reaction. That’s empowering!
Do you want to get to that point too? First, find out if you’re too sensitive or if you’re doing just fine. Here are a few signs that you might be too sensitive:
Your Relationship Is Suffering Because Your S.O. Says You're Too SensitiveAre you and your S.O. constantly arguing because you're upset about comments they're making? Think about what they're saying: are these fairly innocent comments that you're taking the wrong way, or are they actually words to be upset about? Ask someone else for their honest point of view if you need to. Unless your S.O. is abusive, they don't want to hurt you on a regular basis. If your relationship is suffering from these arguments, there is an issue somewhere. Source: iStock
You Cry A lotHave you noticed that you cry more than a lot of other people? If so, that could be a sign. There's nothing wrong with crying (it's a healthy way to feel pain and can be very necessary), but if it's having a negative effect on your life, then it might be happening a little too often. Source: iStock
To You, Every Text Has A Deeper MeaningA text message can send you into an emotional tizzy. Most of the time you're interpreting the text in the worst way possible and giving it meaning that wasn't intended by the author. If you find yourself always reading in between the lines, stop! Sometimes there really isn't a deeper meaning there. Source: iStock
You're Constantly Sending Out Apology TextsYou pick up on the moods other people, and you often associate them with something you've done. You feel like you can immediately tell if you've offended or hurt someone. Look through your text history: if you're constantly apologizing because you've decided that you've done a bunch of bad things, you're probably being too sensitive! I know I have to physically stop myself from sending out these types of texts. Source: iStock
You're Often Hurt By Things Your Friends SayYour friends love you and want the best for you, but you still find a way to get offended by comments they make. This can be super exhausting for the people closest to you! If you don't feel very good about yourself, it can be easy to be sensitive to conversations you have with your friends. Source: iStock
You Break Down When Someone Gives You CriticismCriticism is necessary in order to grow as a person and gain skills, but you tend to fall apart whenever it's given to you. You interpret the feedback as a personal dig (which it usually isn't). This prevents you from working well and learning from others. You'll actively avoid situations where you'll receive criticism. Source: iStock
Emotional Books Can Send You Into A DepressionOther people can get torn up about the same book you're reading, but it can send you into a week-long slump. It gets to you on a deep level. It's fun to get lost in fiction, but if it has the power to completely derail your life, it might be good to avoid that type of stimulation. Source: iStock
You Have A ReputationIf people know that they can't say certain things to you because you'll have a breakdown, you might be too sensitive. People tend to walk on eggshells around you, and it prevents you from getting super close with them. Source: iStock
Do you think you’re too sensitive? Let me know in the comments below!