Valentine’s Day is just a few days away, which means one thing: almost everyone you know who is single is in full-on whining mode. I bet you thought I was going to say chocolate or candy or hearts, right? No. Since the dawn of social media began, Valentine’s Day has morphed from a holiday about love and presents to a holiday where single people spend as much time as possible complaining to anyone who will listen. And I’m really getting bored of hearing it.
I realize that this sounds very harsh, especially coming from the mouth of someone who has been in a happy relationship for the last five years. Maybe you’re single and, at the moment, you feel a strong desire to come find where I live, steal my boyfriend from me, and make me feel unhappy and lonely too. Fair enough. But hear me out: I’m only writing this because I am sick of all of the Valentine’s Day couple shaming going on. Since February started, I’ve seen countless statuses and tweets and Instagram posts about how much V-day sucks, and how much being single sucks, and how all couples suck… ugh! I can’t just sit here and not say anything anymore!
Look, I know that being single on Valentine’s Day can be rough. I’ve been there many times, and it was hard for me too. Full disclosure: I had a few years where I complained about being single and whined about how much Valentine’s Day sucks. But then I woke up, and realized that it didn’t have to be that way. One year, my girlfriends and I all bought each other gifts and hung out, and I had so much fun that I realized that being single on Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to suck if you stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Is that a rude thing to say? Maybe it is. But you know what else I think is rude? Telling Facebook how you’re not interested in seeing photos of the flowers and candies significant others get for each other because it’s pathetic. Uh, good for you? I mean, come on! Get over yourself. You’re single on Valentine’s Day – in the grand scheme of things, it’s not that big of a deal. Because I’m sick of hearing how annoying couples are on February 14, I want to remind y’all that you can be pretty annoying too. Here are the 12 worst things single people do on Valentine’s Day:
1. Make statuses complaining about how single they are and how everyone sucks.
Maybe it’s just because I can’t stand too much personal info being on social media, but I am so sick of seeing people make statuses where they just complain about being single. It doesn’t sound funny or edgy or “cool…” it just sounds like you’re whining and feeling sorry for yourself. Instead of focusing on how you’re “alone,” focus on what you can do to have a good day, because believe it or not, it’s still possible. And hey, by the way, being in a relationship doesn’t automatically mean Valentine’s Day is awesome. In general, it’s a pretty overrated holiday, so please stop having these high expectations about what it would be like if you were in love.
2. Couple-shame even when a couple isn’t being overly annoying.
Yes, there are couples out there who are doing the most on Valentine’s Day, and they need to chill. I will absolutely agree that there are some couples who need to get off social media. But not every couple is annoying on February 14. Not every single couple is going to Instagram their gifts or write long posts about how great their significant other is. And, also, they’re not doing any of that to shove it in your face! They’re happy, and they want to share that they’re happy. Why make fun of them for that? You just sound bitter, and it’s not a good look.
3. Go out of their way to talk about how much they don’t care about Valentine’s Day.
I get it – you’re single, you DGAF, you hate relationships anyway, and Valentine’s Day is lame. You don’t even want to do anything for Valentine’s Day. Even if you did want to, you’re so busy that you don’t even have time. Even if you were in a relationship, you wouldn’t do anything, because you don’t care. Cool. You are very cool, okay? Now please, please try to talk about something else, because the effort you’re putting into discussing this sure makes it seem like you care a whole lot.
4. Remind everyone that they are alone and they are going to get drunk.
If single people aren’t letting everyone know how much they hate Valentine’s Day, they’re reminding everyone that they’re alone and they are going to get very, VERY drunk to deal with this. Cool? This isn’t something that should require alcohol to get through, but okay.
5. Let everyone know how it’s just a stupid Hallmark holiday.
Yes, Valentine’s Day is a Hallmark holiday. I’m not debating that fact. It’s a way for stores to make money after the holiday season slump when nothing else is going on because oh man, February is a depressing month. But at the same time, it exists, and it can be nice to have a day dedicated to love. Just because you’re not into it doesn’t mean you have to drag it to everyone who will listen to you. I bet most of them don’t really want to listen to you anymore, so…
6. Post about how you should express your love every day, not just one day of the year.
The biggest argument I hear about why Valentine’s Day sucks, after the Hallmark thing, is that couples shouldn’t be expressing their love only one day a year, they should do it every day. Single people are always like, “Well, I don’t need a specific day to show people I love them” and I’m like, good for you? The point of V-day isn’t that it’s the only day of the year you can show love. It’s just that it’s a day dedicated to love. There’s a difference!
7. Roll their eyes and make fun of any couple enjoying themselves.
Being bitter is the worst. It makes everyone uncomfortable and it makes you look so immature. Instead of being jealous about couples having fun and making fun of them to make yourself feel better, stop thinking about how single you are, and go out and do something fun. It’s not that hard.
8. Get annoyed at their friends in relationships for being happy.
I used to be friends with this girl who was so angry about being alone on Valentine’s Day that she didn’t even want to hear the plans her coupled up friends had or what they got as gifts. Part of being a friend is being happy for someone even if you’re jealous. So please put your own feelings aside and be a good friend.
9. Expect everyone to feel sorry for them.
The real reason I hate single people complaining about being single on Valentine’s Day is because to me it screams, “Feel sorry for me!!!!” Being single is not that bad, guys. Stop acting like it’s the worst thing in the world!
10. Write long posts about how being single is so much better than dating someone.
I guarantee I will read at least two social media posts about how being on your own is so much better than being in a relationship and everyone in relationships are secretly unhappy. This isn’t a competition, so stop making it one.
11. Generally complain about Valentine’s Day to anyone who will listen…
So, doing all of the above.
12. …But then gleefully take part in the celebrations as soon as they have a bae.
The majority of single people whining about Valentine’s Day would change their tune in half a second if they suddenly had their crush with them on Valentine’s Day. I guarantee it.
Are you single or in a relationship? What are your thoughts on Valentine’s Day? Do you agree or disagree with me? Let me know in the comments.