There’s no worse feeling than the kind that follows a hookup you regret, is there? It sounds hyperbolic to say (in fact, in this moment alone I have thought of about three things that are objectively worse than a regretful hookup), but if you’ve ever hooked up with someone and, immediately afterwards, wished you could take it back, you’ll know what I’m talking about. I mean, we’ve all been there–whether it’s anything from kissing to having sex, there are some instances in which a hook up can be perfectly consensual in the moment that it happens, but leaves you feeling not-so-great about it afterwards.
The good news? This sensation of post-hookup ickiness, while it probably feels like it’ll last forever right now, certainly isn’t permanent. In fact, you can even speed up the recovery process yourself. It just takes some self-communication and a little bit of wallowing. And a shower, probably. Here are some ways to actually get over a hookup that, for whatever reason, you regret:
Don't Beat Yourself UpThe inclination, post regretful-hookup, is to blame yourself. Try not to do this--awkward, embarrassing hookups happen to everyone from time to time, so it's not like you're the only one who this has ever happened to. Plus, beating yourself up about it isn't going to make it go away--accepting that it happened and accepting that it wasn't your fault will help you move on. (Though, if you had sex and aren't sure if enough protection was used, definitely tackle that head on and get a morning after pill and get tested.) Image source:iStock
Figure Out Why You Feel Bad About ItAt the same time, you should try to evaluate what's making you feel so gross right now. Is it the person you hooked up with? Something you did? Something they said? Identifying what's making you feel so crappy now can help you prevent it from happening in the future. Image source:iStock
Talk It Out With Some FriendsCalling up a friend (or two, or three) that you trust will also help you move on. Usually, verbalizing the events of a bad hookup makes it feel less awkward, and hopefully your friends will be able to make you laugh about it (and potentially share their own bad hookup stories). Image source:iStock
But Don't Feel Obligated To Tell AnyoneIf you'd rather keep it a secret, by all means do that. You aren't bound to tell anyone anything about it. Personally, I've found that it's good to tell at least one person what happened, just so it isn't running on a loop in your mind over and over, but if you think the best way to deal is by acting like it never happened you can definitely do that. Nobody has to know. Image source:iStock
Get OutsideSeriously. Just get out out of the house. You know how when you're feeling carsick, getting some fresh air makes you feel better? The same logic applies after a nausea-inducing hookup. Take a walk, go to the park, ride your bike, whatever--just get out. Image source:iStock
Make It Clear That It Isn't Going To Happen AgainIf your hookup is very clearly still down while the thought of doing anything with them ever again makes you want to die, let them know. You don't have to be mean about it, obviously (and you probably shouldn't use those exact words), but you're under no obligation to do anything with hem ever again. Just send a clear "thanks, but no thanks" message along the next time an opportunity comes up. Image source:iStock
Remember That Life Goes OnYou feel gross right now, I know, but you'll be okay. No need to spring for a chastity belt or swear off hooking up forever--eventually, the memories that are making you cringe will fade. This hookup was just a small blip of regret in the sea of otherwise awesome things that will happen in your life, and soon, it'll be like it never even happened. Image source:iStock
Have you ever had a hookup that you regretted? How did you deal? Let us know in the comments!