When it comes to relationships, being able to trust your significant other is really important. Because without trust, there’s pretty much no foundation to build the relationship on, and both you and your partner would end up feeling too paranoid and insecure to actually open up to each other.
I’ve always believed that relationships can never succeed without trust. It’s something that has to be earned and maintained in order for you to be completely open and vulnerable with the person you love. But at the same time, I also understand that the process of giving someone your trust is pretty hard and kind of scary. I mean, trust is sacred and should always be protected, but it’s way too easy for people to slip up and break that trust. So whenever I see people struggling to trust their significant other, I know that there’s usually more to that story, whether it’s the fact that they’ve had their trust broken before or the fact that their partner gave them a reason to feel this uncertain.
But if you’re going through something similar, then know that you’re not on your own. On our boards, a few of our readers discussed the exact same topic, including discussions on how to trust guys in general and how to prevent your trust issues from ruining a relationship. And as usual, the responses were really helpful!
Check out these seven pieces of advice on how to deal if you’re having trust issues.
MeganKBMTHAA said:Maybe you should talk to them, as I’m sure they understand about your trust issues deep down, but then they can prove to you that your thoughts are wrong, that they aren’t going anywhere and that you’ll never push them away. Image source: iStock
Sabbi696 said:You might have good reason to have trust issues. Honestly, make him prove himself. I would be asking to see his phone, and if he makes a big deal about showing it, chances are something is going on. Most of the time when people make excuses and get on the defensive, hey are hiding something. If he lost your trust he needs to earn it back, not just expect you to trust him again. Image source: iStock
Orangenarwhal said:Don't give up yet! I know how you feel, I have serious trust and insecurity issues, which cause me to get paranoid in relationships. But once you realize your problem that is the first step in fixing it. I'm seeing a therapist now, (for many other reasons not just that) and I think it is helping me. Before you can get over your trust issues, you have to learn to trust yourself. I'm no psychologist but I do know that trust issues are rooted in insecurity in oneself. Work on yourself before worrying about relationships with guys, and when the time comes, you'll be happier. Image source: iStock
Charlsp said:This is gonna take some time to get over. There is a huge element of trust that has been broken and there's no saying how long, if ever, you'll fully regain it. But if you really love him and he really loves you too, you will be able to get through it. Unfortunately guys, young guys especially, have this thing where they crave female attention so even if they have a girlfriend. If another girl seems to want them, they find it hard to say no/not flirt back. It's annoying because it doesn’t cross the 'cheating' line, so that's what justifies it in their head. Personally, I'd rethink whether I wanted to be with someone like that. We accept the kind of love we think we deserve. Do you deserve to be treated like that? No. Image source: iStock
Ashes said:I understand how that is. But you shouldn’t over think this too much. Maybe the reason you haven’t been able to open up to a guy is because deep down you know he isn’t the right one to open up to. Love is a risky thing, because when you love you put yourself on the line. I would say listen to yourself. Don’t second guess yourself. And trust me when there is a guy worth you opening up to you won’t even have to think about it. Even if you do make a mistake, don’t worry, its part of growing up. Image source: iStock
Raynarose said:There is no way to keep yourself from worrying- now that the trust is broken, worrying is going to become a norm in your relationship. It's easy when you two are together all the time, and living near one another- but once long distance starts, you will soon come to realize it's harder than you were prepared for. Does he know you don't trust him? Feelings needs to be laid out, both his and yours. If not, things may get even messier. Not trusting him will make you crazy in a long distance relationship-- you deserve better. Image source: iStock
Sabbi696 said:It's tough to make a relationship work after the trust is broken. I know how hard it is to have those suspicions but sinking that low to go through his stuff, that's a bit much. If you want to stick with a guy who doesn't tell you things happened and you have to find out by going through his phone, by all means go ahead. But trust is a major thing in a relationship. If you don't have it you might as well say good bye because when it's broken, it's broken. Image source: iStock
Did you find any of these tips helpful? What other pieces of advice would you add to the list? Tell us in the comments below!