How To Be Confident About Your Big Boobs

Dear Heather,

I need advice for this question that probably seems stupid: how do I feel confident about my big boobs? I’m 14-years-old, and it feels so weird to already have a D-cup. I’m pretty thin too, it’s not even proportional. I have stretch marks on them, which isn’t helping. Once when I complained, my friend told me, “Don’t worry, most boys have big boobs on their porn search list.” That made me feel even worse. I don’t want to look this way at age 14!

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Everyone is always talking about how great big boobs are, which is nice, but also not so nice at the same time. Like anything else, there are perks to having larger breasts, and there are also downsides. Having big boobs isn’t always the best thing in the world. And learning to feel okay about this part of your body can be really hard when so many people are sexualizing it so much. So, I feel you, girl.

First, know that the only people who are going to sympathize with your insecurities are other girls with big boobs. They’re the only ones who truly understand the struggles. You can of course complain to whoever you want, but know that some people just aren’t going to get it. Second, you have to realize that along with the struggles come a lot of positive things. There are great things about having big boobs! It’s normal to feel uncomfortable about them because they’re new, but give yourself some time to adjust.

There are plenty of things you could do to try to minimize the appearance of your breasts. You can avoid low-cut tops or wear baggy clothes. You can consider getting a breast reduction, although that’s very serious. But first, you should focus on learning how to feel okay about them rather than learning how to hide them (which never REALLY works anyway). Go to the mall and figure out which style of clothing you feel most comfortable in. Maybe v-neck tops aren’t for you, but try on all different things until you find something that makes you feel good.

One of the hardest things is dealing with male attention. Dudes love boobs, especially young dudes. They can be obsessive, completely perverted, and more than a little creepy about them. When you don’t want that attention, that attention is embarrassing. Try to ignore them – and when that doesn’t work, tell them off. Unfortunately, some guys are going to be jerks and say things and make you feel weird. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel uncomfortable and stand up for yourself if you need to.

Learning to love your boobs will probably take some time, honestly. It’s worth noting that almost every girl needs time to like her breasts. Girls with small boobs might think you have it made, even while you’re envious of them. Body acceptance is a big struggle! So, good luck, be patient, and try to focus on the things you DO like about yourself. You are way more than just a pair of big boobs, so remind yourself of that!

take care,

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