If you haven’t had your first kiss yet, you probably find yourself thinking about it a lot. You consider what the moment–when it finally happens–will be like to a T, planning out your location, partner, and time of day. In your head, everything can be 100% perfect.
Obviously, it’s normal (and fun) to think about these first kiss situations. Chances are pretty good, however, that your first kiss will…not be like what you imagined (you know, with Harry Styles at sunset on a beach in Cabo, right after he finishes singing a song that he wrote about you). Here are some sad-but-true (but also, you know, funny ’cause it’s true) expectations vs. reality for your first kiss:
1. Your boo:
Expectation: The person you’ve been wanting to kiss forever.
Reality: Not that person. They aren’t sure about you either.
2. Your pre-kiss banter:
Expectation: Smooth. Confident.
Reality: Neither smooth nor confident.
3. What you you’ll look like in the moments leading up to the kiss:
Expectation: Flawlessly flirty.
Reality: Trying hard. Not necessarily succeeding.
5. The location:
Expectation: Beachy. Beautiful. With multiple kissees available if one doesn’t work out.
Reality: Wherever you can do it.
6. What you think the lead-up will be:
Expectation: Tender, yet intimate.
Reality: A little too scared to think about logistics.
7. How skillful you’ll be:
Expectation: Inherent perfection.
Reality: Grudging acceptance of your own inherent flaws.
What you think you’ll look like to random passerbys:
8. Expectation: Objectively cute and romantic.
9. What you think the tongue situation will be like:
Expectation: Juuuust enough.
Reality: Too much. TOO MUCH, I SAY.
10. The aftermath:
Expectation: Mutual adoration.
Reality: Awkwardness. Forgetting how to speak. You know.
11. The entire experience, overall:
Expectation: The perfect blend of classiness and sexiness.
Reality: The acceptance that, hey, first kiss perfection can be challenging.
Have you had your first kiss yet? Was it anything like this? Let us know in the comments!