It’s normal to have questions about your sexuality as you get older. It’s inevitable that you’ll have confusing feelings towards people that are difficult to categorize (Is it platonic? Romantic? Sexual?). The media, television shows, and our parents all like to tell us that we’re either straight or gay, but those narrow definitions don’t always make sense to you. It doesn’t help that sexuality is a difficult subject to discuss with friends. *insert stressed emoji face here*
You may be familiar with the Kinsey Scale, which explains that sexuality is not black and white (heterosexual and homosexual), but a continuum between the two. Living in a world that subscribes to the orientation dichotomy can be difficult for people who fall near the center of the Kinsey Scale. However, times they are a changin’, and it is becoming more and more acceptable to admit that you’re attracted to both males and females. Yay, progress!
Wondering if you’re bisexual? Here are some signs that you might be. But please remember, at the end of the day, no magazine, book, TV show, other person, or website (even Gurl!) can tell you what your sexuality is. You’re the only one who can determine that. And don’t rush yourself! You will figure it out, and you’ll know when you know. Does that sound infuriatingly vague? Yes, but it’s the truth! Good luck, girls.
You Genuinely Feel Like You Want To Hook Up With A GirlIt's totally normal for straight girls to think other girls are cute, or even gorgeous. Bisexuality comes into question when you're not just thinking about how pretty the other girl is, but when you're thinking what it would be like to kiss her, touch her, and be with her in a more intimate way. Everyone wonders about same-sex experiences, but if you think about it on a daily basis or imagine in detail about what it would be like, it's possible that you're bisexual. Think of your fantasizes as a road map to your sexual orientation. If they are taking you down the path of being intimate with a female, you shouldn't ignore them. Source: iStock
You Fantasize About Kissing Guys AND GirlsThis sounds obvious, but it's clearly important. If you ONLY think about kissing/being with girls, then you could be a lesbian. If you ONLY think about kissing/being with dudes, then maybe you're straight. But if you think about both genders in this way, then maybe you're bisexual. Source: iStock
You've Questioned and Researched SexualityIf you've found yourself Googling "am I bisexual" more than once, you might be answering your own question. We often look for answers from others when we had the knowledge inside us all along. (Is that a quote from Wizard of Oz?) Here is a good rule to live by: know thyself! Source: iStock
You're Into Lesbian PornIf you really like watching videos of two girls together, it could be a sign that you're bisexual. It doesn't necessarily mean that you are, but it might be a clue. It's not rocket science- if two girls together turns you on, it probably would turn you on in real life, too! Yes, it's totally normal for straight girls to watch lesbian porn - so this could go either way. Remember that if a few of these signs add up, it means more than if you just relate to one. Source: iStock
You Push Females Away Because You Feel ScaredIt sounds weird, but you might be afraid of showing signs that you're attracted to them or of making sexual jokes, so you keep your female friends at a distance. You avoid sleepovers or intimate moments because you're worried it will be apparent that you're bisexual. Even innocent things like touching them or giving them a compliment make you extremely self conscious. Source: iStock
When You Heard Of Bisexuality, Something ClickedIf you went through the beginning of your life with no clue that you could be anything but straight, felt confused, then heard of the term "bisexual" and felt less alone - that could be a sign. If it's something you can really relate to and feel describes you, then maybe it does! Source: iStock
You Could See Yourself Having A Future With Either SexBisexuality is about more than just wanting a sexual experience with another woman. Bisexual people don't just run around having sex with everyone (that's a common and unfair misconception). They also develop real, lasting relationships with guys and girls. Think about it in a serious way: could you see yourself settling down in a real romantic relationship with another woman? Source: iStock
You Feel Jealous When Certain Female Friends Are With GuysAnother common and unfair misconception about bisexuals is that they like all of their same-sex friends. That's not true, but maybe you do have a crush on a female friend and you don't even realize it. Maybe you don't realize that you're attracted it a girl, but all of a sudden you get pangs of jealousy when she's around her significant other. Those feelings can be confusing, but they may be a sign that you're actually sexually and romantically attracted to her. Instead of suffering internally, it could be time that you admit that you're bisexual and explore relationships with people of the same sex. Source: iStock
You Have A Type You're Attracted ToYou could probably name the qualities that turn you on in a guy (tall, dark and handsome perhaps?), but if you can also do that for women you could be bisexual. If you get that tingly sensation around super feminine girls or androgynous ladies, that might be a sign that you're closer to the center of the Kinsey Scale. You have a female "type!" Source: iStock
Your Inner Self Knows You're Not StraightThe most important thing is what you feel. Call it a gut feeling, a voice from above, or your subconscious- if you're inner voice is telling you that you're bisexual, maybe it's time to listen to it. After all, no one knows you better than yourself. Source: iStock
Do you ever wonder if you might be bisexual? If you are bisexual, how did you know? Let’s talk about it in the comments below!