Text messages, as a general rule, are kind of the worst. This is because they are, without fail, nearly impossible to gauge meanings from (like, the multiple meanings of the word “okay” and “cool” alone could fill an entire sub-heading on Wikipedia). Because of this, texting friends can be hard. Texting a significant other, too, can be a challenge. So, when you start texting someone with whom you aren’t sure what your relationship is, exactly–you’re not quite dating, but you’re not just friends, either–you can pretty much expect to throw every ounce of comprehension out the window.
Don’t worry, though. We’ve put our very best minds to the test to get down to the bottom of what those nebulous are-we-or-aren’t-we texts ACTUALLY mean:
1. The non-committal “hey:”
What it means: Ah yes, the ol “hey” text. It can mean a number of things–I’m bored, I’m lonely, I’m horny, etc. In most cases, though, I’d say to just take this at face value. Sometimes, a “hey” is just a “hey.” You can say “hey” back, probably.
2. What’s up, tho:
What it means: I’m putting what is literally the least amount of effort possible to keep this conversation alive.
3. That fine line between “lazy” and “chill:”
What it means: See the above. They want to keep texting you, but are relying on you to pick up the slack.
4. Time to put in some effort:
What it means: This text is significant, but only if it comes after like a month of them being totally MIA. In most cases, it comes as a response to something they saw that reminded them of you (a really great selfie on Insta, perhaps?). Note the unusual attention to detail here–there’s punctuation; a comma and a question mark.The underlying message, essentially, is Oh yeah. You exist.
5. Sliding into your DMs IRL, so to speak:
What it means: This says, “I wanted to initiate a conversation with you, but I don’t want to build it off of something concrete.” Enter an awkward discussion of your rapidly disappearing Snapchat story.
6. Netflix n chill:
What it means: “I want you to come over. I’m basically filling in the blanks according to your interests.”
7. Evaluating options:
What it means: “I may or may not want to see you. I would like you to be available either way, however.”
What it means: “I really want to see you, but I’m doing my best to sound as nonchalant as possible. Is it working? Do I sound “chill?” Not that I care.”
9. Emoji time:
You sent them a thoughtful, detailed message, and you get…this in response. K? Basically, they want to keep you in their texting inbox, but they don’t really want to put effort into it. Plus, they’re lazy and don’t want the texting ball to be in their court–they want you to be responsible for initiating any hanging out that happens later.
(My advice? Wait it out. Make them double text.)
What it means: I’m scared of being in my house alone. You should come over.
11. The classic:
What it means: Well, this depends on the time. If it’s the early morning? They just want to talk to you. Late at night (when this text, statistically speaking, is most likely to be sent)? That’s a bootycall, girl.
Have you ever gotten any texts like this from a hookup buddy? Did I forget any all-too-familiar hookup texts? Let us know in the comments!