Texting is SO HARD. I’m not being dramatic- trying to decode and read into messages from people in your life is downright exhausting. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sent a screen grab of a conversation to a friend asking, “What do you think this means?“ We analyze the emoji usage, the number of characters, and the punctuation to arrive at our conclusion. It’s a high stakes mission for sure.
Sometimes you get a text that makes you feel… well.. bad. You can tell that something is bothering the person you’re texting, but they haven’t explicitly said so. Instead, they’ve opted to send a passive aggressive text in the hopes that you’d be able to decipher what is going on. COME ON. You’re not Carrie from Homeland– you don’t have the skills or the time for this CIA sh*t.
If you are the unfortunate recipient of a passive aggressive text, have no fear- we’re here to help you figure out what’s going on. Here are what 12 passive aggressive texts REALLY mean.
The Seemingly Casual 'No Worries' TextWhat They Say: "No worries." (Period included) What They Mean: Sometimes this does actually mean "don't worry about it" (usually when accompanied by an exclamation mark or an emoji). But most of the time it means "I'm saying no worries but what I'm actually saying is a soft 'eff you' because I don't want to get in a fight with you right now but i will hold it against you." If you receive this on its own, it probably means the sender is actually a little hurt by your actions. You better do some damage control. Maybe even *gasp* give them a call so you two can hash it out in real time.
The 'If You Want To' TextWhat They Say: "If you really want to, sure." What They Mean: "I actually don't want to do that at all, but I don't know how to tell you that so instead I'm hoping you'll pick up on it and decide NOT to go through with it on your own." If someone wants to do something, you'll be able to tell. If they don't want to, but they don't know how to say that, they'll say something noncommittal like this.
The 'I'm Ignoring Your Question' TextWhat They Say: Everything EXCEPT the one answer you were looking for. What They Mean: Either "I don't know how to answer this so I'm just stalling until I figure out what to say" or "I don't want to do what you're asking so I'm hoping you'll pick up on that by my non-response." If they don't come right out and text "Yeah!" or something similar, they are passively aggressively giving you a big fat "NO." Your over-analytical mind might say, "Well maybe he/she wants to hang out but they just didn't get around to texting me a confirmation." Your friends might even corroborate your delusions. WE SO BADLY WANT THINGS TO WORK THAT WE COME UP WITH ALL KINDS OF EXCUSES. Don't be fooled- this kind of response is a coward's way of letting you down easy.
The Dreaded 'It's Fine' TextWhat They Say: "Fine" or "It's fine." What They Mean: They are literally the opposite of "fine." It's 2015 - we all know that "fine" actually means NO THAT IS AWFUL AND I HATE YOU. Okay, maybe it's not that serious, but it's close. If you get a "that's fine" or "it's fine" or just "fine" text, know that it's not, but the sender either doesn't want to elaborate or wants you to figure it out on your own. Or they want to act like it's okay but let you know it is NOT okay. Fair? No. But it happens.
The Half-Joking 'Fine Don't Answer' TextWhat They Say: "Lol k don't answer I guess." What They Mean: "What exactly are you doing that means you can't text me back right now? Are you seriously being this rude and annoying?" You probably had to step away from the phone to drive, take a shower, or LIVE YOUR LIFE, but the other person took it as a personal dig. (Some folks are needy like that.) This kind of passive aggressive text comes in many different forms. "..." or "okay bye" or "well have a good night" are all ways a person lets you know that they are hurt that the conversation abruptly ended.
The Dreaded 'So' TextWhat They Say: "So..." What They Mean: "I'm about to launch into something that is difficult to say and/or difficult to hear, so get ready." UGH. This text is the worst. It's basically the person's way of saying, "I have something really big/important/awkward to say to you but I want your permission first." JUST COME OUT AND SAY IT! If you get this text- brace yourself. You're about to receive a text from a dramatic person. (Maybe pick up the phone and call them to say you the awkward exchange.)
The Clearly Annoyed TextWhat They Say: "Hope it's worth it." What They Mean: "You know I don't want you to do this and you're doing it anyway, which is making me reconsider our relationship, so if you do this just know that I am going to be pissed and it's going to cause a huge issue... but hey, if you don't care about all of that, then go for it. Also, don't have fun. I hope it sucks." Whenever someone says "hope it's worth it," just know that whatever you're about to do is going to make a huge problem.
The Infamous 'K' TextWhat They Say: "k" or "Okay." (Period necessary) What They Mean: "I am pissed and instead of saying I'm pissed, I'm saying "k" because we both know what "k" REALLY means." This is the one letter of the alphabet that strikes fear into the hearts of all recipients! Everyone knows by now that responding this way to a text is a clear way of saying, "THIS IS NOT OKAY BUT I'M GOING TO PRETEND THAT IT IS." Aka whatever you just said pissed the other person off, but they're too chicken to say that.
The Emoji ResponseWhat They Say: Some sort of emoji that is kind of cute. What They Mean: "I don't know what else to say because I either disagree with you or I'm confused and I don't want to get in the middle of things, so I'll text this little emoji to take place of the words I can't say." When you text someone something really heartfelt, vulnerable, or revelatory, you might be confused by the all emoji response. This is usually their passive-aggressive way of saying, "I'm not on the same page," "I'm uncomfortable," or "I don't think we're close enough to talk about that." If you receive a text like this, it might be best to take a step back in the relationship.
The 'Do Whatever You Want' TextWhat They Say: "Do whatever you want." Maybe they throw in an, "I don't care." What They Mean: "LOL don't do that. I mean, you can do it, but if you do it, I'm going to be mad at you. I care. I care A LOT." or "I'm not going to tell you what to do but I wish you had decided to do what I wanted to do." If this is accompanied by some exclamation marks or cute emojis, it might be genuine, but otherwise this person is going to hold this against you BIG TIME. Expect some arguments in your near future.
The No Response MoveWhat They Say: Nothing. NOTHING. What They Mean: "I don't want to say anything because if I do it might start a fight" or "I don't know what to say" or "I'm over this, please stop texting me." When you text someone a question or confess something to someone and they don't respond, it's safe to assume this person is passively agressively giving you information you don't want to hear. Instead of coming out and and telling you, though, they are taking the easy way out by not writing back. Don't fixate over it, don't double-text, don't call. . .just cut your losses and move on.
The 'Never Mind' TextWhat They Say: "Never mind" after starting some sort of argument. What They Mean: "Forget it. You clearly don't get it and this isn't worth my time." You didn't respond/weren't able to help in the way that they had anticipated, and they don't know how to tell you that. This text is like saying, "I hope you feel really bad right now because you let me down." OUCH.
Which passive aggressive texts do you hate receiving? Are you guilty of sending any of these? Let me know in the comments below!