7 Signs Your BF/GF Is Too Insecure For A Relationship

When you hear the word insecure, you probably envision someone nervously wringing their hands, scared and unsure of themselves. That’s fair enough, but insecurity has other faces, too: The seemingly confident dude who is always ragging on people, that girl who is always offended when her friends don’t hang out with her, that friend who seems so happy and sure of herself, but complains about her BF having a passcode on his phone.

Insecurity rears its ugly head in loads of different places, including our romantic relationships. Don’t get me wrong, we’re all insecure in some way or another, and we can all exhibit those insecurities in our relationships with others. But you have to be on the lookout for relationships that are so steeped in someone’s insecurity that it starts to drive you up the wall.

Check out these seven signs that your boyfriend or girlfriend is too insecure for a relationship. Oh, and make sure you’re self-aware enough to recognize whether or not you might be the one who is too insecure.

They're Absolutely Smothering

They're sulky when you're hanging out with your friends. They want to cuddle constantly. They text you like crazy every few minutes. They're paranoid about people who are liking your Instagram photos... These are all signs that your partner is way too smothering. This can lead to super possessive behavior, which can be ultra annoying and potentially abusive. Watch out.

Freaks And Geeks

They're Obsessed With Going Through Your Phone

This is a huge red flag. Anyone who doesn't trust you is going to make your relationship utter hell, dude. Your privacy is special, don't let somebody violate it because they're deluded into thinking you're texting side baes.


They're Constantly Seeking Validation From You

Look, we all want our partners to tell us that we look cute or show how much they care about us. But when you notice your partner constantly seeking validation from you about everything from their outfit to how much you enjoy dating them, you should be on alert. Again, we all get a little nervous about these things every now and then, but when you feel like you're spending more time proving how much you like them than anything else, your partner might not be ready for a relationship.

Blue Is The Warmest Color

They'll Rush Into Things

Taking things slow is the way to go. When someone is rushing into relationship milestones like saying the L word two weeks into dating, it's a sign that they might be a little too clingy or possessive.


They're Rude AF Braggart Around You

People who feel crappy about themselves sometimes put down or mock others so that they feel better about themselves. They'll even talk very highly about themselves in he process. They want to convince you that they're rad, and whoever they just mocked is bad, so that you'll somehow be so dazzled by how cool they are. Don't buy into it.

The Breakfast Club

They Put You Down

They'll hurl petty insults your way when they feel like their ego is bruised, and then apologize for hurting your feelings later. This person shouldn't be someone you dedicate so much of your time to if they're constantly making you feel like garbage over little things.

Pretty In Pink

They'll Bug You About Past Relationships And Potential Feelings For Other People

Big sign of insecurity: They're convinced that you're still hung up on your ex, so they'll ask you loads of questions about your past relationships. Oh, and if they're not doing that, they're convinced that the guys or girls you talk to are your potential suitors and you could potentially feelings for them. Paranoid much? Avoid!


Does any of this sound like your BF/GF? Do you think that you show some of these signs? Tell us in the comments!

You can follow the author, Ashley Reese, on Twitter or Instagram. Don’t worry, she doesn’t bite!

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  • B Ried

    Well sometimes manipulative people cause someone to feel this way. These articles should also give examples of when someone should be suspicipous.

  • Cris

    my boyfriend fits some of these, and to be honest i’ve told him many times what bothers me and I’ve tried to deal with it, i tried to break up with him several times but he can’t let go of me, he is way dependent and clingy and i am getting a bit tired of putting up with his shit after a whole year of the same things. he has modified some behaviors but he still does many things that bother me and treats me in ways i do not like at all.