11 Things About Being In A Relationship That Are Actually Overrated

You see them everywhere – walking down the hall, sharing popcorn at the movies, clogging your Instagram feed. Holding hands, making out, enjoying date night. Who am I talking about? Cute couples, of course! If you just looked at their lives on on social media, you would probably assume that they have it made and are happier than any other two people in the world. But believe it or not, there’s a flip side to all that happy-go-lucky love.

Sometimes, being in a relationship isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Those things that look great from the outside can actually be a pain in the butt to participate in. Single people don’t have to worry about constantly checking in with their significant other, or remember “important” dates like a three week anniversary. Being in a relationship can be overrated sometimes, guys! I’m not saying it’s all bad, but I am saying that we should stop assuming the grass is SO much greener over there in couple land. Don’t believe me? Here are 11 things about being in a relationship that are actually overrated: 


1. Cuddling


Sure, being the small spoon sounds all cute and comforting, but after more than a few minutes, snuggling is just sweaty, sticky, and uncomfortable. Your ankle really itches, but you don’t want to scratch it in fear the movement will bother your significant other. How did it get so hot under this blanket? It’s really hard to watch TV with your neck at this angle. Why does that position look so comfortable when it is actually the worst? Is moving too mean? Ugh.


2. Cute text messages… all the time.

text message

Getting “good morning” and “how is your day” texts feels great in the beginning. But after a while, all of the texting starts to feel a little bit more like nagging. Is it weird to only talk once in a while?


3. Presents


Yes, it’s awesome to know you have someone in your life who is going to buy you a really good present on holidays, anniversaries, and birthdays. But, uh, that means you have to buy awesome presents for them too, and that gets expensive, fast. Being in a relationship costs a lot of money!


4. Always having someone to hang out with


You never have to wonder who will go see the latest movie with you, or who you’ll ask to prom, or worry about having nothing to do on a Saturday night. Your boo is always there to be your partner! Except now it’s expected that you’ll hang out all the time, and sometimes you want a little space. It’s weird to feel like you have to ask for “me” time.


5. Hooking up

making out

Of course intimate moments are one of the best things about a relationship. But after the honeymoon stage is over, you don’t have the urge to do it as much as you used to. It can get awkward!


6. Holding hands

holding hands

Clammy palms aren’t the only drawback of holding hands. Sure, strolling down the sidewalk hand in hand looks cute, but it’s not a very convenient way to travel. Walking with your arms around each other is even more difficult. Why do movies make this look so easy?


7. Date night

lady and the tramp

In theory, this is one of the most fun parts of being in a relationship. You can dress up and go out for dinner and a movie, or mini-golf, or a jazz show, or…what else? Nothing makes you realize how boring your town is – or how expensive it is to go out – than continuously needing to come up with fun ideas for date night. This will quickly morph into pizza and Netflix, and you can do that on your own.


8. Becoming friends with their friends


Adding two friend groups together means you end up with twice as many friends, right? Wrong. It means your friends will annoy his friends, or his friends won’t like you because he spends all his time with you, or hanging out with his friends means video games and burping.


9. Being able to post lovey-dovey stuff on social media

best friends

Admit it: you feel a little smug when you get to post lovey-dovey pictures and captions about your relationship on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. But you know what sucks about being a couple on social media? Feeling the pressure to post and do stuff like this. It’s stressful!


10. Taking couple photos

couple photos

You finally get to be one of those perfect #nofilter couples on Instagram! Trust me – you’ll need a filter. Those adorable “candid” photos were planned. It took six tries to fit both of your heads into the frame. You won’t get as many like Likes as you think you will. It’s kind of a disaster.


11. Celebrating anniversaries


Congratulations! You’ve made it to one week/one month/one year! Now what? Some people like celebrating anniversaries and some people don’t even remember them. If you’re in a couple that has one of each, good luck. If you do choose to celebrate, you set the precedent that the next anniversary has to be even bigger and better. Why set yourself up to fail?


Which of these things do you disagree with? What did we forget to include? Tell me in the comments!


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  • Elizabeth Fields

    I found this article to be extremely judgmental. Is there something wrong with people if they enjoy all those things? Yes, I understand that some people actually do feel that all these things are overrated but you’re alienating the people that like all these things.

  • Sarah Yu

    This is just overall a very pessimistic and not a completely realistic picture of being in a healthy relationship.

    With clear communication, there should be no pressure to do any of these things, but you do need to put in the effort, as does your S.O.

    Of course there will be times when the relationship will get mundane, but if you’re with the right person, you’ll enjoy the mundane moments.

    In my relationship, communication is something we work on a daily basis to make stronger, but overall it’s stable and steady.

    If we don’t feel like cuddling or don’t want to post stuff on social media or be friends with each other’s friends, we tell each other and we’re on a level where we can do it without fear of retribution.

    For date nights, you and your S.O. can either choose to sit in and watch Netflix or to put in the effort and time to come up with something free or inexpensive to do.

    You shouldn’t always or often feel weird or awkward when expressing yourself to your S.O. and if you do, then you’re not in the right relationship and should seek to resolve it or to break it off.

    This may or may not happen to people in relationships, but I don’t think it’s wise to take this post as more than a grain of salt, because when you’re in a healthy relationship, you’ll find these to be misleading and/or stereotypical.

    My hope is that every girl realizes what it truly means to be in a healthy relationship and to not focus on the bad or ‘overrated’ things about being in one. Date yourself before you start dating someone else.

    • Elizabeth Fields

      Thank you so much for posting this. I was worried I was the only one that was offended by this article. All of your points are so true.