It’s no secret that dating can be really tough. Getting to know someone during the highly stressful environment of a first or even second date can make people act really, really weird. While some people know date etiquette, too many do not. If you’re ever in the mood to lose faith in humanity, consult the Internet for real life terrible stories about dates.
There are so many out there that we decided to use some of them in place of hookup confessions – it’s basically the same thing anyway! So, from this Ask Reddit thread, here are 10 dating horror stories so bad that you won’t actually believe they’re real. In fact, you’ll probably end up hoping that they are not real. Enjoy!
A New Meaning For Cheap EatsImogens: I met up with a guy for a date in college who I had met through my roommate, she swore he was a great guy and we liked the same stuff so it seemed like a great idea. He told me he was going to make me dinner and then we could go watch a movie, it was sweet. So he comes to pick me up from my dorm and we start driving towards to store. I think ok so we need to get groceries first a little weird but fine. Nope. He drives around back, stops the car and tells me he is going to check the dumpsters for food. He also adds I can come too if I want, "its fun". I sat in the car and watched him rummage through bins for like 20 minutes. Not a good first date tactic. Source: iStock
The Phone Stealeraxianaa: not my story, but a friend's. she met this guy online and they went to a restaurant for dinner. in the middle of dinner she excused herself to go to the bathroom, and she left her phone on the table. a few hours later, she got some texts from about four or five of her female friends saying "uh...what?" she checked her messages and the guy had texted several of the female names in her phone book asking if they wanted to have sex. she did not return his calls. Source: iStock
WTF Happened Here?from_my_phone: I was young and dumb. I met a guy online and let him pick me up. When I answered the door, he accused me of lying about my stats because I was taller than him. I'd told him I'm 5'7", he told me he was 5'9". I'm really about 5'6.75" - so who was lying? For some reason, I didn't shut the door in his face. We'd decided on dinner and a movie. He drove me to the restaurant: Taco Bell, the drive thru and then he looked at me to pay. I did, as he said he'd pay for the tickets. I would have appreciated a heads up, but whatever. We eat in his car, because that's super fun, and go see some blah scary movie. No funny business. After the movie, I'm giving him directions to take me home. He pulls off somewhere and wants to get something started. I have enough time to wiggle out of his grasp before I realize his dick is out. Gross. I make it clear nothing is gonna happen, so he gets out, and jacks off onto (?) The side of the car (his mom's car, might I add) before taking me home. And that was my worst date. Source: iStock
When Your Date Insults You...711x: I was on a second date with a guy who, I thought, was pretty normal. We went to a movie and after it was done he suggested going to an ice cream place across the parking lot. I agreed and we walked over. When we were close to the ice cream shop, he grabbed my love handle and said, "I can tell you like ice cream, Fatty!" (I was 5' 6" and 130 lbs) I continued with him to the ice cream shop, loaded my bowl with toppings, let him pay for it and walked to my car. He asked where I was going, I said, "Home." He asked what I was going to do. I replied, "Nothing." FOUR years later, I got a text with a pic of him trying to reconnect. I guess his dating tactics weren't working for him. Source: iStock
When Hiking Goes Wrongbutter_and_bacon: One time I decided to go on a hiking date. I am not outdoorsy. First off, I could not get the day off work. So in my 22 year old genius mind I decide to swig ipecac syrup to make myself sick so that I can be sent home. (Oh my god my stupidity makes me cringe over 10 years later). So, it works, I puke and leave work. Meet the guy at the state park. Neither of us have any hiking stuff, you know...trail mix, maps (this is pre smart phone era, gasp!). ..WATER...who needs that stuff in 100 degree heat. It was July in Florida. Loooong story short: we get hopelessly lost. For hours. I passed out from dehydration and land in a red ant hill and was stung probably 500 times. The guy had to sling me over his shoulder and walk around screaming for help. Eventually some (real) hikers rescued us. I landed in the hospital overnight for heat exhaustion and severe dehydration. The guy awkwardly came to visit me, but I felt like I was going to die and just ignored him. We never spoke again. Haven't been hiking since. Source: iStock
The Guy Who Never Learned Mannersnepaligirl: I went on a date this one guy I met off of tinder. He came to pick me up, which was a total rookie mistake because I had no escape -_- but anyway, he showed up high as a kite. Took me to a sushi place that I frequent and boasted about how hard it was to get reservation there. The place is decent but not "reservation needed" type, if that makes sense. Anyway, he was SO effing rude to the waiter. Like snapping his fingers and all. When he went to the restroom, I had to pull the waiter aside and apologize for my his behavior. It was THAT bad. I, honest to God, thought I was in a bad TV show. But nope, real life. He spent the ENTIRE two hours talking about himself and how rich and successful he was. Anytime I tried to tell him something about me, he HAD to one up me. Like no matter what I said. If I said I went to a baseball game, he told me about how he caught the f****** ball and had some players sign it. If I said how one time I was on TV for like 15 seconds, he told he about how he went to a "private" Jason Derulo concert and was called up on stage and was on TV the entire time. Made no sense. Whatever, buddy. I just want sushi. After the dinner, he wanted to hang out more, but I made up a bullsh*t excuse about how I had to work early the next day and told him to drop me off. He offered to let me take a hit of his weed, which I politely declined. So he proceeded to hot box the car. Probably got second hand high but whatever. He tried to call me and set up a second date. Needless to say, there was no second date. I still get really bizarre snapchats from him. I keep him around for entertainment. Ohh forgot to mention, but he also PROUDLY told me how he didn't tip the waiter. Source: iStock
Police InterruptionBewarethewulf: After the date, he was driving me home, did a stupid, illegal move, and got pulled over. He decided to run from the police (with me in the car). He tried to pull into a driveway and hide, but they found us. Aaaanyway, they put us both in handcuffs while they searched the car. They ended up giving me a ride home, and took him to jail. Apparently it was a stolen car. I never saw him again, as he was extradited to another state for outstanding warrants. So that was exciting. Source: iStock
The Creepy Stalkerescapevelocity11: I had been sleeping with this guy for a few months and towards the end of things he started randomly showing up at my house (we lived in a similar area of town and he rode a bike) when I wouldn't answer his calls/texts. I was in the middle of a horrible semester of my PhD program and spent a lot of weekends napping on my couch after working all day. One night, he showed up at my house at 3:30am and woke me up by knocking on my door. I didn't even go to the door - I knew he'd go away eventually. The next morning you could tell he had been treading in my bushes trying to peek into my bedroom window. I sent him a text the next day telling him I was no longer interested in seeing him following his creepy behavior and that I didn't want to talk to him anymore. He FLIPPED out. He called me hundreds of times and sent me hundreds of text messages. At one point he showed up at my department and was searching the halls for me. He finally told me he was going to turn on my spigots and flood my yard if I didn't come to my house to talk to him. I called my landlord and he went over and found him ripping up the bushes in front of my front window. He told him to leave, etc. This guy texted me daily, then weekly for about 2 months following this incident. It was the most bizarre thing I've experienced since I moved for graduate school. Source: iStock
The Crybaby Storyronniejean1: I met up with this guy at a restaurant, conversation is going well, up until we order. He then excuses himself and is gone for a seriously long time. I thought he just left, and I was considering paying the bill and ditching out too. Maybe ten minutes later he walks back in with blood shot eyes. I thought he went out and smoked, which is a deal breaker for me so I knew the rest of this date was pointless. Then, he apologizes for his absence and told me I ordered the same dish as his ex and he got emotional and went and cried in his car. Seriously, I ordered the chicken alfredo, pretty common meal. Needless to say, that was our first and last date. Source: iStock
When A Fetish Gets Awkwarddustyglass: Long story short he wanted to pay me and photograph me in lingerie from a low angle. He has a fetish for giant as in Titan-like women, he even showed me his collection of photos. He wanted to photoshop us into city like landscapes and make himself look tiny as I stepped on him. It was.. Something alright. I rejected the offer and he was cool about it. But it was.. Unexpected to say the least. Source: iStock
What is your worst dating horror story? Tell us in the comments or email us at firstname.lastname@example.org anonymously!