Ask A Guy: I Hooked Up With Someone And Now He Won’t Leave Me Alone

Teenage Girl Victim Of Bullying By Text MessageHey Joel,

I went on vacation and was introduced to a guy over the phone. One thing led to another, then we were sexting, sending nudes, etc. The next day we met up with some friends at the beach. We snuck off and I let him finger me and gave him a blowjob and a hand job. Now he won’t stop texting me and he is trying to come to the house I am staying at. He has become OBSESSED with me but the feeling is not mutual. What should I do?

Summer flings like yours and one night stands are always difficult after the fact, as it’s inevitable one person is more into things than the other. Also, when most guys find a hookup that they enjoy, they do all they can to keep that person in the mix.

In many ways, this comes down to just how little you actually know about someone until you meet them face to face. While online relationships may feel just as real as knowing someone in person, being behind a keyboard allows people to only present exactly what they want. So many parts of their personality can be hidden, and this often leads to disappointment and worse when face to face finally happens. That’s not to say that online relationships can’t be great, but you really need to be cautious until you meet them.

All that being said, you have a right to your privacy and to not, from what it sounds like, be stalked to a certain extent. What you need to do is be very clear with him and let him know it was a one-time thing and that you’d prefer he didn’t contact you anymore. Once you’ve made that clear, simply ignore him. Most phones can block specific numbers, so that will help in you not having to deal with him. If he continues to pester you and just won’t leave you alone, you may want to involve your parents, or in the worst case, the police.

In the end, one-time hookups can be fun for sure, but there’s always a chance you’ll get someone overly obsessed and make you never want to do that again. Whether you meet them online or out in real life, some people get attached quickly and jump in way too far way too fast. Guys like that are few and far between, but give yourself some time to recover from Captain Obsessed before you head out on another date of any level.

Good luck!


Joel Freimark has done a lot in life and seen even more. From last minute international travel to bizarre places to writing award winning books, he’s here to bring his wisdom to all your problems. He hosts a weekly advice series on Youtube and a music series also on YouTube.. No question is too outrageous or personal, so go ahead and fire away! Follow him on Twitter.

Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Joel, email him at!


Ask A Guy: I Want To Have Sex But My Boyfriend Doesn’t. What Should I Do?

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