It can be hard to recognize when someone is taking advantage of you, especially when that someone is a guy you really like. We all want to believe the best about people, even more so when it comes to our crush or our significant other. Sometimes, our gut notices these signs and tells us that something is wrong, and we choose to ignore it because we don’t really want to believe it.
No one deserves to be taken advantage of, and if the person you trust is doing that to you, you need to leave the relationship. Sticking it out and hoping it will change will never make things better – it will only make them worse. Let me give you a quick example. I have a friend who has been dating a guy for a very long time. He’s been taking advantage of her from the beginning and now, even after years of being together, he still won’t make things official or even do anything nice for her. It’s really depressing to watch.
You deserve better than that! Look out for these 10 signs a guy is taking advantage of you, and if he is? Kick him to the curb.
You Only Hang Out On His TermsI was once with a guy who was clearly taking advantage of me. We only hung out when he made plans, and those "plans" were usually made at the last minute. When I asked to make plans, he would either ignore me or say he was busy. Once we were hanging out, we only did what he felt like doing - we never did what I wanted to do. If this is happening for you, it's a bad sign. Stock photo © mihailomilovanovic
He Wants To Hook Up Every Time You're TogetherA real relationship is about a lot more than just hooking up. So, if a guy is using you just for sex, he's going to make everything about sex all the time. What are your hangout sessions like? If they consist only of you going over there, starting to watch a movie, hooking up, and then leaving shortly afterwards, that means he's only in this for sex. Stock photo © RapidEye
He Refuses To Make Things OfficialHow does he react when you ask to make your relationship official? A dude who cares about you and really wants to be with you will make a commitment to you. If he has all sorts of excuses like, "I don't like commitment" or "I'm not ready for a relationship" or "I just want to keep this casual," then something is holding him back. If he won't make things official no matter what, watch out - he's taking advantage of you because he knows he can get away with it. Stock photo © Wavebreak
Everything Is Always About HimDoes he ever ask you how you're doing? Does he ask about your day and genuinely care about the answer? Is he ever concerned with your feelings? Remember that guy who was taking advantage of me? Yeah, he was super selfish and made everything about him. We could hang out if he wanted to, but not if I did. We could go out if he felt like it, but not if I wanted to. We could talk about him and his problems, but never mine. Take note of this stuff. Stock photo © Lise Gagne
He Always Asks For Help Even If He Doesn't Help YouSometimes a guy isn't taking advantage of you for sex - sometimes he's doing it for something else you have. That could be money, or a car to ride around in, or even just someone to lean on whenever he's feeling lonely. I have a friend who dated a guy who clearly only kept her around so she could give him a ride and lend him money when he needed it. He NEVER did anything for her. A relationship is a give-and-take thing. If he asks for help, he should be willing to give it to you when you need it. Stock photo © annebaek
He Is Only Romantic and Nice When He Wants SomethingStart keeping track of any romantic gestures or especially nice moments. Do they always seem to happen before he asks you to do something for them? If so, he's manipulating you and taking advantage. My friend's boyfriend who takes advantage of her gets super, super sweet every time he needs a big favor. Also, whenever she tells him she's done, he pulls out all the stops when it comes to romance - sending her flowers, buying her gifts, sending sweet texts. Once she's back, it all stops. Pay attention to when your guy is extra nice. Stock photo © mediaphotos
He Won't Make Things Official But Expects You To Act Like You're OfficialThe guy I dated who took advantage of me did this all the time: he refused to be my boyfriend, but he wanted me to act like he was my boyfriend. He got furiously jealous every time I flirted with other guys (even though he flirted with other girls). He expected me to be around whenever he needed me, and he wanted me there when he needed to talk - but he never showed he cared in any other way. Stock photo © PeopleImages
He Flirts With/Sees Other GirlsOne huge sign that he's taking advantage of you? If he flirts with or hooks up with other girls while keeping you on the side. This means he just wants you there when he wants you. That's selfish and gross. Stock photo © Izabela Habur
He Never Goes Out Of His Way For YouDoes he ever help you without being asked? Does he ever do nice things for you without complaining or without you having to beg him? Does he make compromises for you? If he doesn't, get rid of him. Stock photo © BraunS
He Never Says Thank YouHow does he react when you do something for him? If he never says thank you or expresses any sort of real appreciation, this means he just expects you to do this stuff and isn't actually grateful for any of it. In other words, he's taking advantage. Stock photo © helenecanada
Do you think your guy is taking advantage of you? What do you disagree with? Tell me in the comments.