Back in high school, I had a few female enemies who I seriously disliked. My mom tells me to never use the word “hate” about another person, but there was one girl who I particularly could not stand. The girl, Sam, was rude, very conceited, patronizing, and basically thought she was better than everyone else. To make matters worse, she had a not-so-secret crush on my boyfriend, and hated me simply because I was dating him. She had a lot of people fooled, but I knew what she was really like.
One year, she had a huge party and invited almost our entire class… except for one person. Yup, you guessed it – me. When my loyal best friend asked if I could come along, Sam gave her a flat-out no as an answer. One time, she IMed me on AIM just to tell me that no one in our high school liked me (when I asked who did like me, she said “the shorter answer would be, who does?”), for no reason whatsoever. Another time, she spent over a year anonymously commenting on my online Deadjournal, leaving nasty comments that made fun of everything about me (I later found out it was her all along). There are many more things that Sam said and did to get under my skin and leave me feeling miserable, but I’m not in the mood to rehash them.
I wasn’t only hurt and furious – I was also really confused. I had been friends with this girl when we went to a Catholic middle school together, up until she left for public school. When I switched to my public high school, I was comforted by the idea that I would at least know and be friends with Sam, but I guess I shouldn’t have been. Sam had transformed into an angry, bitter bully, who disliked me for no real reason at all. She made it her personal mission to make me feel like crap in high school, despite the fact that I had never done one thing to her.
I don’t know what Sam is like now, and I really don’t care to find out. I saw her once during college, and when she tried to act nice to me, like nothing had ever happened, I blew her off completely. I have no room for people like her in my life, and you shouldn’t either.
Every single day, girls are treated like this by other girls. Who knows the reasoning behind the bullying? It could be jealousy, intimidation, fear, insecurity, or a mixture of all of that. What I do know is that dealing with a girl you dislike who doesn’t like you either is really, really hard. You don’t know whether to lash out, ignore her and wait for it stop, or try to get revenge. If you’re in a similar situation, check out these 8 things you shouldn’t do when you hate another girl. Avoiding this stuff will ensure you end up on top, getting the best revenge of all.
Don't Sub-Tweet, Or Do Anything On Social Media*Supposedly* Katy Perry and Taylor Swift are fighting right now, and *supposedly* this tweet is Katy Perry throwing shade at T. Swift. Taylor gave an interview in Rolling Stone magazine where she called out another female pop star for trying to sabotage her tour, saying she didn't get along with the person and things were awkward. All signs point to Katy Perry being that pop star - including this sub-tweet Katy sent out this morning. I'm all for #TeamKaty, but let's be real: throwing shade via social media is never a mature way to handle a disagreement. Sub-tweeting or making Facebook statuses about each other, or even throwing out some rude hashtags via Instagram is not the way to go. Not only does it make things even more tense, it also invites everyone else into your business.
Don't Retaliate By Saying Bad Things About Her TooOn that same vein, don't try to get back at this girl by talking badly about her behind her back... yes, even if she's doing that to you. I know it sounds lame, but being the bigger person will only make you look more mature. Talking about her behind her back makes you seem just as petty as her! It's hard to complain about something someone is doing if you're doing the same thing, not to mention the fact that it will only encourage her to continue being nasty to you. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Cry In Front Of Her For SympathyThe aforementioned Sam once made me so upset at school that I dramatically ran out of class crying and demanded to be sent home. I thought that my show of sadness would maybe get Sam to realize that what she was doing was really hurting me. Instead, it added fuel to the fire. My crying showed only my weakness, and she used it to make fun of me even more. Awful? Yes. But that doesn't change the fact that some people are just like that. Instead of showing her how upset she's making you, make it seem like you could care less. It will make her feel much less important. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Start Fights During SchoolI know that sometimes things get so heated with the person you don't like that there's nothing left to do but exchange angry words... or yelling. I get it. We can't all be composed 100 percent of the time. But if you're going to fight with this girl, or speak up and say something to her, don't do it during school. You're going to attract unnecessary attention, and you'll probably both get in trouble. If you want to say something to her, say it after school on your own time... or through the phone.
Don't Try To Get RevengeIf you watch a lot of movies like I do, you know that revenge plot lines can be some of the most exciting and satisfying stories to watch. Unfortunately, real life isn't like the movies, and your revenge scheme will probably fall apart, leaving you to pick up the pieces. Instead of plotting revenge (like Cady did to Regina in Mean Girls), just focus on yourself. The best revenge is living your own life and showing her just how little she means to you.
Don't Bother Paying Any Attention To Her At AllSeriously though: the thing you can do that will most get under this girl's skin is ignore her completely. People don't like to be ignored, especially people who are trying to hurt you. If a girl is being mean to you, she wants a reaction from you, the more dramatic the better. If you ignore her, she'll feel like you don't care... and that's a good thing! Show her that you have your own fabulous life to worry about, and her actions don't affect you in the slightest. Then vent to friends on your own time. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Feel Too Embarrassed To Get Someone Else InvolvedIf this girl really starts to bother you or cross the line, don't feel like you can't speak up. You can always go to a counselor, teacher, parent or trusted adult if someone really starts bullying you and you feel that uncomfortable or unhappy. It's not embarrassing and not something you should feel ashamed of. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Let Her Make You Feel Bad About YourselfThe most important thing to remember is that you should never let this girl (or anyone) make you feel bad about yourself. Don't let someone else determine your worth. Not everyone in this world will like us, and that's okay. If someone is putting time and energy into being mean to you, it's because they have a problem, not you. They're more than likely jealous, insecure, and unhappy with themselves. Picking on someone makes them feel powerful. Remember this, even when they say things that hurt badly. Source: ShutterStock
Do you go to school with a girl you really don’t like? How do you deal with her? Have you ever been bullied? Tell me in the comments.