10 Thoughts You’ll Have When You See A Penis For The First Time

Penises (penii?) are pretty weird, right? I mean, they just kinda hang there and aren’t all that appealing to stare at. I’m sure there are some people who are really into looking at them, but the general consensus is that we’d rather not.

When you see a picture of a penis in biology class or in a movie or even when you get a penis pic, it’s a lot different than seeing one in person. Seeing an actual penis for the first time is like… whoa. It’s not that you didn’t know what to expect, but it’s just different seeing all that junk in real life. And you’ll definitely have these 10 thoughts:

1. “So… this is it.”

It’s happening.

2. “Is that color normal?”

I don’t really know.

3. “That must be really annoying to have between your legs.”

Like, what do you do with that?

4. “How do they sit on bicycles?”

Seriously. HOW?

5. “Is that too much/too little hair?”

Did he manscape for me?

6. “Why is it pointing that direction?”

Is it supposed to curve left?

7. “It’s looking at me weird…”

8. “I wonder what it’s like to have one.”

You can literally pee anywhere!

9. “Am I supposed to keep looking?”

Like, I don’t really want to stare at this forever.

10. “I’d be okay if I didn’t see that in the light again.”

Penises are great, but I really don’t need to look at them all the time.

 
Did you have these thoughts when you saw a penis for the first time? What other thoughts did you have? Tell us in the comments!
 

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  • EmmaBobenna

    A friend of mine was gay just because it hurt too much to have sex with men. So I guess any girl can just decide to be gay?

    • Stacy

      A girl attracted to a girl is technically called “lesbian,” not gay. Sorry! Grammar queen! 😛

  • chi

    1. Holy crap that huge
    2. thats not gonna fit.

  • A

    Surprisingly the first time i saw my boy friends dick it wasn’t even awkward.
    it was a night in a new environment and i was feeling adventurous and i was just drawn to give him a blow job…. it wasn’t even horrible!

  • YAAAS

    THIS IS SO ACCURATE AND HILARIOUS I’M DONEEE :”’D

  • Alishia

    One thing that fascinates me about my bf’s penis is how much it moves! he can control it with little jerks, and it grows and shrinks as he is turned on and off!

    • Minx

      Thats how most of them work.

  • Mashenka

    I think dicks are gross looking. I guess that’s why I bat for the other team, lol

    • Kelsey

      Tell me about it!! Hahaha XD

  • raspberry_fizz

    The first time I saw my boyfriends penis, I totally freaked out. It seemed huge, and it was just there, standing straight up, just staring at me. I looked up at the sky so I wouldn’t have to keep looking at it. He saw that I was a little weirded out, so he gave me a hug and was so sweet about it. I’ve seen it since and it doesn’t freak me out anymore

  • pinkheart

    The first penises I ever saw in a sexual way were online, I think I was 11. When I looked at them I got tingly feelings in stomach and my vagina started throbbing, so it was a good experience for me, and I ended up masturbating. Before that, I saw them on statues and in drawings so the first real adult penises were close ups from a website about penises, it wasnt porn but they also showed erections, ejaculations, what foreskin was, so it was very interesting, I remember I started masturbating a lot. I learned about circumcision and that most men in the world still have foreskin. Since then I have seen many many of them in porn and in movies and online. I dont mind the way they look and to me they are a turn on, but I can see why they arent to some of my friends.

    Not all dicks are attractive and not all of them are ugly, there is such a variety of the way they look, I can see why they say, there is one special penis for each of us.

    • Tammy

      I think that the human body, whether man or woman, are quite remarkable. not trying to sound cheesy lol. Both are really just flesh in between the legs haha. I also used to search website where i could see guys masturbating and ejaculating, just cause i was so fascinated by it and what the penis does

  • Amina

    I never saw a penis in real life and i’d rather not to, god those thoughs are scary and discusting … EWWW,k bye

    • Alishia

      you’re being very closed minded about that… penises are great, one day you’ll get that

      • Kelsey

        Hey now, don’t say that for sure. I’m a lesbian and can say I never got the appeal of dicks and doubt I ever will, and I’m almost 24. Not every woman out there likes them.