Whether you’re a virgin or a little more experienced, telling your boyfriend that you’re ready to have sex for the first time can be nerve-wrecking. Letting him know that you want to be that intimate with him can leave you feeling vulnerable and maybe even a little insecure… especially if it’s something you guys have never talked about.
But it’s okay! Talking about having sex for the first time is something every couple goes through at some point. The conversation might be a little uncomfortable, but it’s not as bad as it seems. In fact, sometimes it’s super simple. So, if you’re ready to go all the way with your man, and you’re not sure how to let him know, keep reading. Here are 10 tips on how to tell your boyfriend you’re ready to have sex.
Make Sure You're REALLY SureBefore you say anything, make sure you really do feel ready to have sex. Think about this a lot before you speak up. Of course you have the right to change your mind after you tell him (and please know that it's absolutely okay for you to do that), but it will make things a lot easier if you try to figure it out beforehand. Just give yourself time to think about this - it's not something you should jump into quickly. Source: ShutterStock
Be Ready To Have A Conversation About Safety FirstSafety is the most important part of sex, so consider your options before talking about it, and be ready to have this conversation with your BF. Do you want to go on birth control pills? Will one of you be willing to buy condoms? Have you guys talked about STDs yet? Do you know if he has anything, or if he's been tested? These are all things you need to think about before having sex. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Overthink ItI know you might be freaked out, but try not to stress about this too much. Chances are, your boyfriend is going to be thrilled that you're ready to have sex. Even if he's not ready, it's not like he's going to get mad or upset with you for bringing it up. He's not going to think you're too forward, he's not going to think you're weird, and you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Building it up too much is just going to make this harder. Source: ShutterStock
Know It Might Be A Little Awkward, But It Will Be OkayOf course this conversation might be a little awkward, especially if you're really nervous. But that's okay! Not everything can go movie-set-smoothly all the time. Just be able to laugh off any awkwardness. And honestly, if you're even too uncomfortable to have this conversation, maybe you guys aren't ready for sex yet. Source: ShutterStock
Bring It Up When You Guys AloneThis isn't the kind of topic you should bring up in school or when you're with your friends. Tell him when you're alone. The easiest time to let him know is when you're already fooling around. Things will already be hot and heavy, so all you have to do is say something like, "I think I'm ready to have sex," and it will seem much more natural. Source: ShutterStock
Or Do It Through The Phone If You're Really NervousIf you would be more comfortable telling him when you're not face-to-face, that's okay too. You can tell him when you guys are texting or talking on the phone. This might be easier, because then you can talk about everything right then and there, without both of you being really in the moment, feeling distracted. Source: ShutterStock
Or You Can Always Show Him Instead Of Saying AnythingCan't get the words out? Show him until he gets the hint. Flirt heavily, start fooling around and making out, and then as things get more intense, just make it clear that you're ready. You can do that however you want. Chances are, he'll ask you, or bring it up on his own. Then you can say that, yes, you are ready. Source: ShutterStock
Just Do It!When it comes down to it... just say it! Like I said, he's your boyfriend: he's not going to freak out if you say you want to have sex. He's probably going to be thrilled, or at least really flattered. And even if he's not ready, it's good for you guys to discuss what you both want! Source: ShutterStock
Be Open and Honest About What You WantThis is also a good time to discuss what you're both looking for, especially if you're not a serious couple just yet. Don't leave this conversation until after sex, because things can easily get emotional and messy that way. Before you get into it, maybe even before you tell him, be clear about what you want out of him and the relationship. Source: ShutterStock
Respect What He Wants To DoNot every guy is an oversexed maniac who just wants to do it. Your boyfriend might not be ready, and if he's not, you need to respect that. Don't pressure him into anything, and don't make him feel bad for not being on the same page as you. Show him that you'll wait if he wants to. Source: ShutterStock
Have you ever had to have this conversation with your boyfriend? What did you do? What did I forget? Tell me in the comments!