What Should You Do If Your Boyfriend Calls You A Whore?

In relationships, it’s really important to respect your partner. Unfortunately, some of us get stuck in bad situations and might not even recognize that we’re not being respected because we’re blinded by the relationship. Abuse comes in many different forms, and it’s not always physical. Mental and emotional abuse is just as serious and difficult.

This week on the message boards, I came across a pretty heavy topic: what should you do if your boyfriend calls you a whore? Let’ see what you had to say before I chime in on this:

pepsiface004 asked:
“My boyfriend thinks I’m a whore because I’ve dated two dudes. BEFORE I MET HIM. I’m 22 years old. I personally think 1. it’s messed up to look down on me because I had a life before I even met him. And 2. it’s a little possessive and crazy. Am I the only one who seriously thinks this because his family agrees with him?”

naughtylicious said:
“GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP… quick. His family is as crazy as he is and so very narrow-minded too.They are not a progressive lot and if he is doing this to you now just imagine what the future holds for you. LEAVE THE JOKER.”

summerchica734 said:
“In my opinion, you should ask him and his family to apologize. It is NOT okay for them to call you a whore, even if you’ve been with 100 guys. If he doesn’t apologize or continues to call you names, I’d advise you to break up with him.”

S0Exciited said:
“If it’s causing this much strain on your relationship, that’s really ridiculous. I wouldn’t waste another breath arguing about it. Whenever he brings it up, I’d simply say that I was done talking about it. If he keeps this up, it seems like he is going to lose you which is something you should let him know.”

stayclassy said:
“I think that he is finally showing his true colours. First of all, having two boyfriends before 22 does not make you anything besides a person who had two boyfriends before 22. Second, I know you feel you have invested a year and a half with him, but a year and a half is not a long time in the grand scheme of things. Meaning, do you really want to invest another year and a half, so it will be three years from now you are still unhappy and won’t leave because ‘you invested three years in this’ to enjoy the next 50 years if you want to be with him forever?

What I am trying to say is that that’s not only sexist but absolutely ridiculous, and there is probably more up his sleeve. That is a way to control you to guilt you into something from your past you can’t change (not that you would want to). His family is obviously from the 1800s so you should leave them there and join us in 2014.”

Rissaxo said:
“If he’s calling you a whore, there’s something wrong with him. Not you.”

I know what it’s like to be in an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship, and this is exactly something that happens when you’re with an abusive partner. I dated a guy for a long time who made me feel horrible about myself, called me names and made me think something was wrong with me for having a past.

It was awful, but I didn’t see at the time that I was actually in an abusive relationship until one of my friends helped me realize that my boyfriend calling me the c-word was not okay. If one of my friends had come to me with the same problem, I would have seen it immediately, but I was in too deep in my relationship to step outside and see what was going on. I realized that this guy was controlling and jealous to the point that I isolated myself from my friends and only had him to rely on.

If your boyfriend calls you a whore or makes you feel badly about the fact that you had a life before him, it’s a form of abuse. And this guy’s family sounds terrible too. I would get out of the relationship as soon as you possibly can, which I know is easier said than done. Unfortunately, if he’s calling you a whore for having two boyfriends before you even knew who he was, it’s probably going to escalate from here.

You have done nothing wrong and do not deserve to be verbally abused or made to feel like you’re less than. You are wonderful and amazing, and you deserve someone who is going to treat you right and who won’t call you names or judge you.
 
What do you think? Have you ever been in this situation? What did you do? Tell us in the comments!
 

Need advice on a different topic? Do you have a story you want to share? Post your own thoughts and questions in our boards and start chatting with other girls.

 

What should you do if you like a younger guy but are worried about him being too immature?

 

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Posted in: Boards, Health, Sex & Relationships
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7 Comments

  1. avatarKaterina says:

    I have to say one thing ladies be strong!!!!! I am 28 years old and I have 2 kids and my youngest is from my boyfriend now he’s 30 let me say I was called whore by him yesterday sept. 11, 2014… You better believe I do not let no man call me names especially whore.. And what did I do??? I slap his face 4 times and throw his glasses out the 3rd floor window!!!

  2. avatarSplushh says:

    If you’d leaving a relation ship like this, be careful. They may try to stalk you, or physically harm you (even if they’ve not done it previously) set up a plan with your friends, an try not to let him convince you to stay.

  3. avatarAnonymous says:

    My best friends boyfriend called her a whore and she is still together with him because she says she’s in “love” so I don’t know what to do.

  4. avatarPhillip Sinclaire says:

    I have never called my girlfriend a whore or commented on her past relationships with other men. I would only ever say anything only if her previous lovers were to approach me and say something negative. On the other hand I don’t know too many men that would bother going to their x girlfriends new boyfriend and trash talk her. But it has happened. If photos or I overheard discussions of my girlfriend by friends or acquaintances that were not in the best light I would maybe investigate them. Again, face it nobody likes to see his girlfriend bent over getting from strange man on a I phone. Again, I would think things through before saying anything to my girlfriend. Maybe she was raped or taken advantage of and doesn’t even know the existence of tapes or videos. All potentially damaging but would never let me think that calling her a whore is justified. If I am in a good relationship,hopefully I Know my woman is a good person. And just maybe she was to frightened to tell me about things that may of happened to her.

  5. avatarGrace says:

    I WOULD KICK THAT GUY SO HARD IN THE FREAKING BALLS AND JUST SLAP HIM AND PUNCH HIM AND DO WHAT ELSE BECAUSE HE AIN’T NO BOYFRIEND HE’S A D-HEAD HE DESERVES TO DIE NO BOYFRIEND SHOULD EVER CALL YOU A WHORE AND GET AWAY WITH IT.

  6. avataryellagyrl***34 says:

    OMG sounds a lot like what iam dealing with now i been wih my sons father for 7years and i be dog on if he calls me names be cause of my past but thing here is he dosent even know my real past life he is going on from what he has heard from other ppls.he aways accusing even when me and his sons are having a day out in the park. he swears i meeting someone.So its true when someone say your not the one doing wrong they are they just telling on them selves…..or they either a jealous and have very low self esteem about themselves Pray4 your lover

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