Comments of the Week: Losing Your Virginity

Whether you think the concept of virginity is sacred or stupid, there still comes a time in our lives when we lose it. Yeah, whatever it means to you will definitely differ from person to person, but we’ve still been socialized to see that moment as some kind of personal, sexual milestone. Good or bad, you always remember your first time.

Of course, we love talking about v-cards here on Gurl, and our readers do, too. Here are seven of our readers’ comments about their first times. See which stories you might relate to.


From Losing Your Virginity May Not Be A Big Deal!

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From From The Boards: Do Girls Really Get Attached To The Person They Lose Their Virginity To?

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From From The Message Boards: My Boyfriend Said I’m Bad At Sex!

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From From The Boards: Do Girls Really Get Attached To The Person They Lose Their Virginity To?

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From From The Boards: Do Girls Really Get Attached To The Person They Lose Their Virginity To?

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From Losing Your Virginity May Not Be A Big Deal

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

From 8 Tips On How To Deal With Regret After Sex

Illustration by Sarah Wintner

What was your first time like? Are you waiting for that special someone? Are you a virgin but aren’t too caught up about virginity? Tell us in the comments!

10 Things Virgins Are Sick Of Hearing

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Posted in: Virginity
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  • Danni

    im with an older guy who wants sex and I do to hes very kind and mature about me been a virgin and he respects me oh so very much but the only thing stopping me is what if his dick dosnt fit and it gets extremely awkward!! What do i do ?? please help me please!?!?!?

  • confidentGurl

    Phew! I lost my virginity on Valentines day this year. I was out at the mall with my friends and we were having a great time. I bumped into this guy who was travelling around the world from Denmark and he was so cute. He was in his twenties. I lied to him about my age and he asked me if i wanted to go to his place. He was so nice to me and we got chatting and got really really close and it was the first time I french kissed. I let him touch me and finger me and I let him do stuff. It was first time ever for everything. I had never had a boyfriend never knew what oral sex was but I never felt weird or anything with him. He was the nicest guy I had ever met. I spent the whole day with him and I lost my virginity to him that day. Later he told me he knew I was much younger but didn’t mind and really enjoyed doing it with me. I had just turned 13. It was awesome.

  • Annalea

    I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a month and I feel like I’m already ready to have sex. I AM a virgin still at almost 19 years old but I’m very scared to do it. What do I do?

  • ness

    I was 13 he was 19 when I lost my virginity. It was exciting and I knew I was ready. Whats the big deal I don’t know. Isn’t sex natural. If it is then why is there so much concern and negativity about losing ones virginity. I was so thrilled and I let him do it.

  • Precious

    I think i’m stil a virgin,bt nt 2 sure. Ma bf wnted 2 do it bt i cudn’t bear d pain,so i told him 2 stop

  • Precious

    M nt really sure if i,ve done it,i felt d pain bt i told him 2 stop.

  • Bells

    I’m 17 and my boyfriend and I have been together for a year. We gave each other our virginity about three months ago. I haven’t regretted it, and neither has he. Since then we’ve had sex.. a decent amount, and we’re happier than ever. For us it just worked, we love each other and when the time was right I looked in his eyes (we were kissing) and told him “I’m ready” and right before he went in he looked in my eyes and asked “Are you sure?” and I nodded. He was super gentle, it didn’t hurt at all, and it was great. It didn’t last long, but it didn’t matter. We made love and it was incredible. Afterwards it was kind of weird for both of us, not bad weird, just weird. It took a few days for our minds to get wrapped around the idea that we had sex. There was no doubt thought, neither of us regretted it, and it brought us so much closer. We talked about it a lot and tried to work our minds around it because it really didn’t make us feel different in the larger aspect of things, but it did bring us closer together and have feelings for each other in a whole new way. Like I said, we’ve had sex more since then and it’s great every time (I don’t mean that we both climax every time, just that because we love each other the passion that’s there is all that it takes to make it amazing). So, not all first times are horrible, don’t let the bad stories discourage you.

  • Robert

    To the girls whining about the “property” comment. There is nothing wrong with being somebody’s else’s property. It is the epitome of humility to serve another. My body belongs to my wife and she belongs to me.

  • Celeste

    I am 20 and have been married almost 2 years now, I have been together with my husband for 5 years. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was married because I believe it’s something special you don’t just give away to anyone. Girls there is NO rush. Save it for a guy you know will love you for the rest of your life <3

  • elleelephant96

    I lost my virginity about two months ago with my friend, who is now a fwb, i never thought of it as being a massive deal and still dont, i didnt want to be in a relationship losing it as i am focusing on my future (being at college) and i knew i was ready. I have been friends with him for about 2 and a half years.. he knew he could trust himself and i knew i could trust him as well.. even though we did kind of fall out the day AFTER i’d lost it.. its complicated but we have a solid friendship, with a benefit haha:’)

  • aaaamy

    I’ve been with my boyfriend over 2 years now and I still haven’t lost my virginity. It’s not that I don’t trust him, he is the sweetest, most thoughtful and trustworthy guy on the planet, it’s just I’m kinda scared I might regret doing it at my age (17). Like all of my friends lost theirs aged 14 to 16, so I feel pretty pressured from them. I think I’m ready, but it’s only my mother who’s standing in my way, she says I have to wait until I’m 18, but I’m ready now, what do I do? Like surely this is my decision to make, not hers?

  • Allison

    “It would be a great reward and assurance to him that your his property”.

    Please ladies, remember your body is your own. You are not someones property and thinking that way is dangerous.

  • zerolove17

    I am 17 years old and just lost my virginity a few days ago. I knew the kid for a month now and just look at him as a friend. I was very nervous and scared. I have a high pain tolerance so at first when it was happening I was tense as shit and he helped calm me down. If you loose it to someone who will ease you through it and don’t rush it it’ll be perfect. It also helped he has Some Experience. I don’t regret loosing it to him and you shouldn’t regret it either.. Wait for the right time or right person. It should feel good and not bad. 🙂

  • belinda

    am still a virgin and am so scared to do it….i guess jst hv to wait until i fil lyk doing it

  • JuniorGirl15

    “If we wait until we’re READY, We’ll be WAITING for the REST OF OUR LIVES.” …. I feel pretty confident in losing my virginity really soon.

  • Suzanne96

    Well, I know this will sound stupid. . But when I was 16 I almost had sex, he was a jerk and I WAS completely stupid and ” innocent” .. But it didnt happen. . But I regret everything that happened that day. . He calls sometimes, and start saying bad things. . I live in an Islamic place ( kind of) , and living in an Islamic society without belonging to it actually sucks, I guess its the reason I feel bad
    ( excuse my terrible English)

  • Alex

    The guy I lost my ‘virginity’ to was a friend, and we’re still friends to this day. He’s in a relationship with a lovely girl now, and I’m enjoying the single life.
    But he took his time with me and ended up not hurting at all, it was actually fun when I taught him how to pleasure me (communication is not only important, but fun), and it was just a great hour of exploring each other and I’m lucky to have done this with a friend and still come out as only friends.

  • Max

    Most of these are quiet negative. I lost it at a very young age, right before graduating middle school. My boyfriend was also my best friend, and we continued seeing each other until freshman year began and we drifted apart. Even though we didn’t live happily ever after, it wasn’t a bad way to lose your virginity. The unfortunate thing was that there was such a stigma attached to having sex that young that, when I came clean about not being a virgin, I got called a lot of names for it. I haven’t been with anyone else, but I don’t regret anything.

  • DaynaMarie

    I was with the first one until the thing about “assur[ing] him that you’re his property.”

    Gurl, you are you’re OWN property and no one else’s.