You could go to the store to pick up a Hallmark card with a sweet message for Mother’s Day… or you could head over to Etsy, where you can buy a Mother’s Day card that discusses your mother’s vagina, along with a detailed image. I mean, let’s be honest here, which one sounds more appealing?
In all seriousness though, I love checking out Etsy for homemade cards for different holidays. They are always more personal, and usually way funnier, than anything you would find in the store. While there are a ton of great Mother’s Day cards to choose from, there are also a ton of terribly inappropriate ones to choose from. Now, I have nothing wrong with talking about vaginas (I basically do it all day for Gurl), but talking about my mom’s vagina? That’s a different story. Here are 20 terrible and inappropriate, but admittedly funny, Mother’s Day cards from Etsy.
1. This one that will remind your mother of her painful labor.
2. This one that basically says, “Thanks for making me need therapy, mom. Have a great day!”
3. This one that’s like, LOL you can’t do things, you’re a woman!
4. This passive aggressive one that basically says, “You’re annoying.”
5. This one that basically equates your mom to a uterus (because why?).
6. This one that is just mean and horrible.
7. This one that will happily remind your mother of all of the things she couldn’t do once she had a baby.
8. This one that might as well say, “YOU’RE OLD HAHA.”
9. This one that your mom will not be able to show to anyone because it’s awkward.
10. This one that is like, “Well, thank God I’m around to make you look like an actual human being.”
11. This passive-aggressive one that reminds your mom that her parenting just might be the reason you’re in therapy.
12. This one that reminds your mom of something she’s probably REALLY grateful for.
13. This one that is sweet in a weird way?
14. Yet another one that shows that you’re weirdly obsessed with the birthing process your mother went through.
15. This one that is like, “Thanks for having me even though I made your boobs saggy. YOUR BOOBS ARE SAGGY.”
16. This one that is a joke, sort of.
17. This one that brings up the unnecessary subject of your mom’s whole down-there area.
18. This one that really doesn’t seem like a joke at all.
19. This one that is actually just not nice at all.
20. And this one that is basically like, “Leave me alone, have a great day!”
Which of these Mother’s Day cards is your favorite? Would you buy any of these for your mom? Which do you think is the most inappropriate? Tell me in the comments!