Being a good friend isn’t always easy – it takes time, commitment, energy, and sometimes selflessness to really be there for a person. Sometimes being the best friend you can be takes as much effort as a romantic relationship does! This is probably why so many people mess up and become bad friends… it’s like taking the lazy way out.
But how do you know if you’re being a bad friend to your besties? Well, for starters, you can check out this Reddit thread about what it takes to be a terrible buddy. I’m sure that we’ve all done a few of these things at least once – that doesn’t make you a terrible friend. Doing them all the time, and not trying to change any of that is where you go wrong. Here are 10 qualities that make someone a bad friend.
Being A One-UpperEnaplena: Always having to 1-up whatever you say or do. UGHHHH, the absolute worst. I hate when people are like this. You don't ALWAYS have to have the better, crazier, more interesting story. After a while, it's really frustrating to listen to. Source: ShutterStock
Not Listeninglaurahrahrah: People who confide in you and then aren't there to listen to you when you need to confide in them. I'm happy to listen to all of your problems and help you work through them, but I lose the desire to do that if I know the second I want to tell you something about my day, you change the subject back to you. Being a good listener is key. I had a friend who is was needy - she wanted me around when she needed someone to talk to, but when I needed someone to talk to, she was too busy. Or she would talk, but consistently change the subject so things went back to her. Is it any surprise we're not friends anymore? Source: ShutterStock
Acting Really Fakefountaindiving: Acting like they are your number one supporter, but then belittling you behind your back. I recently stopped being friends with a girl because she did this. To my face, she would support everything I said and agree with me. Behind my back, she would run to other friends and tell them everything I said, making fun of me and making me seem terrible. Don't do this to your friends. Acting fake only makes you look like a jerk. Source: ShutterStock
Being Sneaky and UntrustworthyiMajorJohnson: Not being able to trust them, there's nothing worse then having a friend that will go behind your back trying to get with your SO and all that bullsh*t. Realizing you can't trust a friend is one of the worst feelings. Don't be that friend who everyone feels like they can't trust - don't do things behind your friend's backs, and treat people how you would want to be treated. Source: ShutterStock
Acting Like You're Better Than Thempetiteasiatique: Taking advantage of you, acting as if they're superior, failing to acknowledge your contributions to the conversation. Yup, all of these things stink. Don't ever take advantage of your friend - don't use them for something, and then ditch them. That's just rude. And don't like you're better than anyone - that's annoying. Source: ShutterStock
Making Lame Excuses Instead Of Being Honestunrecoverable1: When they make lame excuses just to flake you out. Damn, just tell me upfront that you don't want to go instead of wasting both our time. I hate when my friends do stuff like this. Excuses are usually pretty transparent, so why bother making them? Just be honest and say you don't feel like doing that! It's not that hard. Source: ShutterStock
Being There Only For The GoodSHITTING_SHURIKENS: Being there for the good times, but not the bad. Someone you think is a good friend can conveniently disappear when times get hard. They are not your friends. We've all had a friend who has failed to step up when you really need them, and it's a pretty terrible friend. Don't be this person. If you think your friend really, honestly needs you, put aside some time for her or him. That really makes people feel a lot better. Source: ShutterStock
Ditching Your Friends For Other OpportunitiesImplozion: If they ditch you for other things. Everyone ditches their friends once in a while. But if you're always ditching one friend for "better" things that come along, that's messed up. When you make plans, you should do your best to honor them. Source: ShutterStock
Acting Like A BullyMystion: Laughing at you or giving non-constructive criticism, then getting pissed at you when you do the same (usually means they think they're a better person than you: you should listen to them but they're too good to listen to your opinion) This is really, really annoying, and I have a friend who does it to me all the time. She constantly makes fun of me or talks about the bad decisions I make like it's no big deal - yet if I do the same thing back to her, she acts like I'm the worst person in the world! Don't be like this. If you can't take it, don't dish it out. Source: ShutterStock
Always Expecting To Get Something Backvalkyrieone: A friend who always accounts for what they do for you. Especially when money is involved and they completely discount the time and effort you put into things for them (things that don't have a dollar amount attached) and they come back telling you how ungrateful you seem for not "paying" them back. Friendship shouldn't be about a scoreboard. Don't make lists of everything you do for your friend and expect them to "pay" you back for everything. Friendship is about sacrifice sometimes. Of course you shouldn't be the only one doing everything, but you can't act like just because you did one thing, your friend owes you her life. Source: ShutterStock
Do you think you have any of these qualities? Do you think you’re a good friend? Do you have friends who have these qualities? Tell me in the comments!