My love of thrift shopping started in high school and has, if anything, only gotten stronger over the years. I’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years–buying overpriced items, convincing myself that I’ll get a dress altered, etc–but I’ve learned from them and now I sort of feel like a thrift shop demi-god.
Yes. I have the power of finding fly clothes for a bargain. If that’s now a super power then I don’t know what is.
For all of you fellow thrift obsessed people out there, I’m pretty sure you can relate to these 10 things. Yeah, some are a little embarrassing but hey…it’s time for all of us to come clean.
1) You’re very aware of the fact that some of your finds make you look like a grandma.
Whatever, grandma looks forever.
2) You see overpriced thrift crap on Etsy and you’re all…
These schemes. These lies. Why is this marathon t-shirt from 1997 $35? Also, fun story: I once bought a sequin jacket at a random junk shop for $10. A few weeks later I found the exact same jacket on Etsy for $45! I just…
3) But you still browse it anyway
You might find, like, two things that won’t break the bank. Might.
4) And you find out that that oh so rare shirt ain’t so rare because there are a billion people selling it on eBay for a fraction of the price.
The power of Google is strong.
5) You convince yourself that you’re going to alter that amazing dress even though you know you’ll probably never do it.
It’s a nice thought, okay?
6) You’re used to inviting your friends along with you even though they don’t understand why they don’t enjoy spending hours sifting through old, smelly, used clothes.
Just say no to my invite instead of making me babysit you!
7) When you find something amazing but see that there’s a stain on it.
My favorite game to play is Guess That Stain: Blood or chocolate?
8) But then you happen to find something designer for a super cheap price.
9) You realize that you reek of thrift shop smell when you first wear your new finds. But you don’t really care.
A mix of grandpa, mothballs and a dank, musty basement. Mmmm, arousing.
10) Sure, you could get it dry cleaned ahead of time but who the hell has the patience when you wanna look real fly real quick?
And it goes without saying that this is your reaction whenever you talk about thrifting and someone mentions that Macklemore song:
Just let me live! That joke is played out anyway.
What’s your thrifting weakness? Have you ever instantly regretted a purchase? Tell us in the comments!