One of the most awkward things ever is when one of your friends develops a crush on you… but you just don’t like them back like that. You genuinely like them, but only as a friend – and you have no idea what to do about the situation, because you don’t want this person to hate you forever! It’s so uncomfortable and is enough to make anyone feel totally stressed out.
I found myself in this situation a few years ago when a good friend of mine told me he really liked me. I didn’t feel that way about him at all, and I didn’t know how to react, so I ended up making a silly joke that really hurt his feelings. Our friendship recovered, but he never let me forget how he felt – and it was just very awkward. However, we got through it, and now we’re both happily with other people. So it IS possible to reject a friend without alienating him or her forever! Want to learn how? here are 8 tips on how to reject a friend (nicely):
Be Honest - No Lies, Excuses or ClichesWhen it comes to rejection, the easiest thing to do is ignore the other person until they get the hint - but the best, and nicest, thing to do is to be completely honest with them. It's hard, but think about it: how would YOU rather be rejected? Personally, I would rather be rejected by someone with enough respect for me to tell it to me straight. And if you want to keep your friendship intact, this is your only choice. Don't make up a lie like, "I'm interested in someone else," (if you're not), "I don't want a relationship right now" (if you really do), or "Maybe down the road" (false hope is not nice). And try to avoid cliches, like "Our friendship just means too much to me to date you." That doesn't come off as genuine - it just comes off as lame. Just say, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested." Source: ShutterStock
Stress How Much The Friendship Means To YouInstead of saying, "Our friendship means too much to me to date," say something like, "I'm not interested in dating you, but I do love being your friend." It's much more honest. It may not be what he wants to hear, but you still should stress how much his friendship means by letting him know you don't want to lose it. Say, "I know it may be awkward, but I would really love to stay friends." Source: ShutterStock
Compliment Him To Soften The BlowRejections are hard, and no one really wants to hear, "You're great, but I just don't like you that way." But I think it's still important to throw a few compliments in there. Stress the friendship by saying something like, "You're a really great friend, I just can't see us dating." Don't go too heavy on the compliments, because it will end up sounding weird. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Start Avoiding HimOnce you reject him, things are most likely going to be a little awkward. But if you want to stay friends with this guy, you have to try not to act awkward around him. That means don't avoid him or ignore him just because you feel weird. When I rejected my friend, I avoided him for a little bit because I felt so guilty... until he came up to me asking why I was doing that. Avoiding him will alienate him. Don't act like nothing happened and everything's fine, but don't ignore him either. Source: ShutterStock
Give Him Time To Get Over ItAt the same time, you may need to give this guy time to get over the rejection. Being told your crush doesn't like you back hurts - and if he was really bummed, he may need some space from you to move on. It stinks, but out of respect for him, let him have that time. When you reject him, if he says something like, "I can't be friends with you right now, it's too hard," say, "I understand if we can't go back to being besties right away, so I'll give you time. But I'd love if we could be friends again when you're up for it." Source: ShutterStock
Try Not To Discuss It Too Much With Mutual FriendsYou can talk about the situation with your close friends, but don't gossip about it with mutual friends the two of you have. If you were rejected, would you want everyone to know about it? Probably not. Talk about it only with close, trusted friends, and let everyone else figure things out on their own. Source: ShutterStock
Don't Flaunt Other Guys In His Face Right AwayYou can, of course, date other guys or flirt with other guys. But in the beginning, try not to do it so obviously right in front of the friend you just rejected. It's going to make him feel really crappy. You don't have to keep this up forever - just do it for a little while. I'm not saying you should try to actively hide your other romantic activities, but I wouldn't flirt with other guys while hanging out with him, you know? Source: ShutterStock
Don't Expect Things To Go Back To Normal Right AwayEven if you do all of this stuff, things still might not go back to the way they were for a long time. Sometimes, it takes people a while to move on and feel good enough about the situation to be able to go back to being friends with the person who rejected them. Try not to get frustrated with this guy, and like I said, give him the time he needs. Of course, there's always the possibility that the friendship will be ruined. It's sad, but at least you can know you were being honest. Source: ShutterStock
Have you ever had to reject a guy friend? How did you do it? What did I miss? Tell me in the comments.