For most of us, the only real purpose of underwear is to stay clean. It can have it’s perks, like looking sexy if that’s what you want or keeping you, uh, dry, but basically I think we all wear underwear because we’ve learned that we have to (and going commando in jeans is just… not good). So it’s always kind of weird when we read about underwear that has another purpose.
Take, for example, these crazy pairs of hi-tech underwear I’ve rounded up for all of you. These undies don’t just keep you dry and sanitary or looking sexy and alluring – they have other goals in mind. Some of them are actually a pretty good idea while some will just make you be like, WTF?! At the end of the day, you have to admit they all have one thing in common and that’s that they are intriguing. Here are 8 pairs of crazy, weird hi-tech underwear you need to check out:
OhMiBod Vibrating UnderwearThe newest item in hi-tech underwear is... wait for it... vibrating underwear. Yes, it's a real thing. We wrote about this possibly becoming a thing (under a different brand) a while ago, but I don't think it ever happened. Anyway, these vibrating undies are going to be $129 and work along with an app. The app has a remote control to control vibrations and all that - it was made for couples to do it to each other. You can even record sounds, like your partner speaking, to create a unique vibrating pattern. These sound crazy, but kind of... interesting?They go on sale in March, so we'll wait and see. Get more info at OhMiBod.com
FundiesI'm assuming the purpose of Fundies (which are built to be worn by two people at the same time) is to get closer to your boo. But... why? Am I supposed to think that having sex while wearing the same pair of underwear is comfortable? Or is this supposed to be foreplay? I don't know. I mean, do whatever gets you off, I would just pay to see people try and make this work. You can buy these here
Shreddies (To Hide Farts)These are hilarious. I don't really get exactly how they work, but they basically use a filtering system to make sure your farts don't smell. No, seriously. This is a thing that people buy. You can find these here
Butt Enhancing UnderwearConsidering padded bras are such a thing, I guess I really shouldn't be surprised that padded underwear is a thing too. I mean, if this makes you feel better about yourself, I'm all for it, but... I'd just rather you be happy with what you have. You can find these here
Pandeez Disposable UnderwearThese disposable undies are made for when you have your period... or when you have an "accident." I don't know, they just sound weird. And after seeing this picture of what they look like, I am officially completely turned off. No. You can find these here
iBoxerI love finding convenient pieces of clothing that will hold my iPod/iPhone! But in my underwear? That sounds more than mildly uncomfortable. Also, I mean, pockets. You can find these here.
Thinx Period PantiesThinx underwear looks like any regular pair of underwear - but secretly, they are made with leak and stain-resisting material that makes having your period a lot less embarrassing. I'm not going to lie, these don't sound too bad. You can find these here
Anti-Rape UnderwearThese anti-rape underwear aren't a thing... yet. But there was a fund going to make them a thing. They are made of material that can't be ripped or cut or even pulled down - in theory, this is to make it harder for a woman to get raped. While that might seem like a good idea, it is still problematic. First of all, why should women feel like they have to wear underwear that won't rip or tear so they won't get raped? Why can't people teach others NOT to rape in the first place? And second of all, the attacker may not give up so easily... what if the attacker gets angry and does something violent? I just don't know about these.
Which pair of underwear do you think is the weirdest? Which do you think is a good idea? What did I miss? Tell me in the comments.