Anyway, from Post-It notes to finding out you’ve been dumped on Facebook, there are some pretty horrible breakup stories. And there are a ton of equally horrible excuses. I’m actually not above the bad breakup. I went on a break with my college boyfriend because I “wanted time to focus on my internship,” when really I just wanted time apart from him. But I didn’t want to tell him that. We got back together for another two years, but I regret lying about it because that was not okay.
One of my friends recently ended things with her sort-of boyfriend (I don’t really know what they were and neither did they) because he went on this whole thing about how he wasn’t good enough for her. He was going on about how he was a bad guy and was just going to hurt her in the long run. He was saving her the trouble, how noble! Ethan’s addressed this before, and the reality is still the same.
In reality, this guy sucks. They were sort of friends with benefits, but he wanted to be exclusive without being in a relationship (red flag #1). Then he kept telling her he hoped that she was seeing other people because he would be a bad boyfriend (red flag #2). Then he pulled this nonsense about not being good enough for her (red flag #3).
Apparently his last relationship was really crappy, and he was still carrying around a lot of baggage from it. My friend responded to his freak-out by letting him know that if he ever needed to talk about anything that she was there for him. She told him that he was pushing her away, and she was right. That’s exactly what he was doing.
He freaked out because he didn’t actually want to commit to something. So he pulled the “it’s not you, it’s me” card and ran away. It’s a cowardly move, and it’s really annoying. Just be honest and say that you don’t want anything more. That’s all it takes.
If a guy is telling you that he’s not good enough for you, he thinks he’s making things easy. But you’re left wondering what’s really going on. You’re thinking about how to make him feel worthy or what happened in his past to make him feel that way. You see the good in him because you like him so you don’t understand why he feels unworthy of your affection.
Honestly, he’s just not brave enough to end it.
Has a guy ever said this to you? Have you ever used this on someone else? Tell us in the comments!