10 Signs Your Ex Isn’t Over You

Depending on how a breakup goes, figuring out that your ex isn’t over you can either be a good thing or a bad thing. I’ve been in both situations. One time, I found out an ex wasn’t over me and we got back together and everything was happy and wonderful. But another time, I realized that my ex wasn’t over me and it was pretty awful. For over a year, I dealt with a lot of confusing emotions and it was really difficult.

For whatever reason, we all like to know if our exes have moved on for good or not. It can be difficult to figure it out, especially if your ex is usually hard to read, but luckily, there are some telltale signs. I’ve watched so many of my guy friends be in love with their exes and I’ve seen so many of my friend’s exes obviously not over the relationship that I feel like a bit of an expert at this point. Here are 10 signs your ex isn’t over you just yet.

'); } else { jQuery('.gallery-wrapper').addClass('side-gallery'); jQuery('.ad-gallery') .append('
'); } var imgToShow = parseInt() - 1; if (window.location.hash && window.location.hash !== '#') { var imageIndexFromHash = parseInt(window.location.hash.substr(1)) - 1; if (!isNaN(imageIndexFromHash) && imageIndexFromHash >= 0) { imgToShow = imageIndexFromHash; } } if (isNaN(imgToShow)) imgToShow = 0; var totalImages = jQuery('.ad-thumb-list li').length; var galleries = jQuery('.ad-gallery').adGallery({ cycle: true, effect: 'slide-hori', loader_image: '/wp-content/plugins/alloydigital-nextgen-gallery/ad-gallery/images/loader.gif', start_at_index: imgToShow, animation_speed: 400, slideshow: { enable: true, autostart: false, speed: 10000, start_label: 'Back to Gallery', stop_label: 'View All', stop_on_scroll: true, countdown_prefix: '', countdown_sufix: '', onStart: false, onStop: false }, callbacks: { afterImageVisible: function (new_image, old_image) { var thisGalleryInstance = this; imageVisibleCount++; try { if (!window._is_gallery_init) { window._is_gallery_init = true; } else { if (typeof googletag.pubads().refresh !== 'undefined') { googletag.pubads().refresh([lbSlot, rectangleSlot, rectangleMobileSlot, skyscraperSlot]); } } } catch (err) { console.error(err); } jQuery('.thumbnail_view .images-to-thumbnail-wrapper') .html( jQuery('.ad-gallery .ad-controls').clone() ); jQuery('#description') .html( jQuery('#description_' + thisGalleryInstance.current_index).html() ); jQuery('.ad-info') .html( jQuery('.ad-info').html().replace('/','OF') + '  ' ); // var thisImg = this.images[this.current_index].image; // thisImg = thisImg.split('gallery/')[1]; // _gaq.push(['_trackPageview', thisImg]); var thisPic = parseInt(thisGalleryInstance.current_index) + 1; window.location.hash = '#' + thisPic; if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker( 'send', 'pageview', window.location.pathname + window.location.hash ); __gaTracker( 'send', 'event', window.location.pathname + window.location.hash, 'load' ); } jQuery('.ad-image img').swipe({ swipeLeft: function() { thisGalleryInstance.nextImage(); }, swipeRight: function() { thisGalleryInstance.prevImage(); }, pageScroll: 'vertical', threshold: 75 }); if (disableGalleryAd === false && imageVisibleCount % 5 === 0) { jQuery('#ad-gallery-wrapper').remove(); var galleryAdDiv = $(''); jQuery('.ad-image img').remove(); jQuery('.ad-image').css('background-color', '#fff'); jQuery('.ad-image').append(galleryAdDiv); googletag.pubads().refresh([gallerySlot]); // Hide nav button for 2 secs to wait gallery ad to load $('.ad-next, .ad-prev').fadeOut('fast'); setTimeout(function() { $('.ad-next, .ad-prev').fadeIn('fast'); }, 2000); } } } // end of callbacks option }); if (!disableGalleryAd) { googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.display("div-gpt-ad-gallery"); }); } var theGalleryInstance = galleries[0]; jQuery('.ad-slideshow-controls').live('click', function() { var divClass = jQuery('.ad-slideshow-controls span:visible').attr('class'); var label; if (divClass == 'ad-slideshow-start') { label = 'Back to Gallery'; } else { label = 'View All'; } if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', label, location.pathname); } jQuery('.ad-gallery, .thumbnail_view').toggle(); }); jQuery('.thumb-wrapper img').click(function() { // var current = parseInt(jQuery(this).index()); if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', 'View All Thumbnail', location.pathname); } var current = parseInt(jQuery(this).index()) + 1; window.location.hash = '#' + current; window.location.reload(true); }); jQuery('.ad-thumb-list img').click(function() { // var current = parseInt(jQuery(this).index()); if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', 'Carousel Thumbnail', location.pathname); } }); jQuery('.ad-prev-image').click(function() { // var current = parseInt(jQuery(this).index()); if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', 'Previous Image', location.pathname); } }); jQuery('.ad-next-image').click(function() { // var current = parseInt(jQuery(this).index()); if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', 'Next Image', location.pathname); } }); jQuery('.ad-skip, .ad-prev, .ad-prev-image, .ad-skip-next, .ad-thumb-list img') .click(function() { jQuery('#ad-interstitial-wrapper').hide(); jQuery('.ad-skip') .hide(); jQuery('.ad-skip-next') .hide(); jQuery('#ad_interstitial_frame').attr('src', 'about:blank'); jQuery('.ad-next') .show(); jQuery('.ad-image') .show(); jQuery('.ad-controls').show(); jQuery('.desc-wrap') .show(); if (typeof __gaTracker !== 'undefined') { __gaTracker('send', 'event', 'Gallery', 'Skip Ad', location.pathname); } // theGalleryInstance.slideshow.start(); window.location.hash = '#' + theGalleryInstance.current_index; // window.location.reload(true); }); });

Do you think your ex isn’t over you? Would you be happy if you found out he wasn’t or would you be annoyed? Tell us in the comments.


10 signs your boyfriend is a keeper

Follow Gurl, pretty please!
Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr and Instagram

Posted in: Love Advice
Tags: , ,
  • Laura

    Me and my ex boyfriend have been broken up for 2 months. We stayed friends went on day trips ect. It was all good fun, and we got on well. Then a week ago he asked to meet up for a drink (we didnt speak for about two weeks so it was pretty much out of the blue) and he was saying how much he misses me, misses my hugs, then the next day hes got a new girlfriend.
    We spoke yesterday and he said hes too scared to talk to me.. apparently he doesnt want me ruining the relationship, but i thought maybe hes scared he’ll fall in love with me again, and ruin his relationship that way.. i mean thats not my fault.. right?

  • thisfieldmustbeuniquebutimlazy

    My ex boyfriend and I dated for 2 years but he broke up with me and it was a messy break up. I blocked him for a year and then unblocked him in April. I thought I was over with him but I still haven’t dated anyone since him. Two weeks ago, he texted me and apologized for hurting me. He said, “you were my best friend and I fucked you over.” I forgave him and said “if we are meant to be friends, we can overcome anything.” He hasn’t stopped texting me. He ask me what I am doing, sends me goodnight messages, and even asked me to go to dinner once he comes back home. He apologizes if he doesn’t reply back and I go on about my day but reading his messages makes me feel better.

  • Rose

    So ill try to make this long story short…basically my husband and i seperated for about 2 months during the 2 months my son and i moved out to my moms then a friends moms house…now the friends moms house was my husbands friends…which ive know for as long as i was with my husband(5 yrs)…they offered to let us move in cause they said they wanted to help me and they were more on my side because they knew and saw how my husband wasnt helping me with my son. Anyways..i started falling for his friend but i had always had somethin for him..my feelings grew stronger a few weeks Before i left my husband because he was helping me take care of my son..i know it might sound like i left my husband for him but i promise thats not why. But anyways i told the friend how i felt and he felt the same way. We both agreed to wait a little while since everything had just happened so we could start talking. A few weeks passed and the friend did everything first..said i love you holding cuddling kidding etc. Everything was done in secret though because his mom had said i think it be perfect yall have known each other long enough but just wait a little bit…so we kept it a secret with everything we were doing but we never had the actual title of “boyfriend girlfriend”. Out of no where he cut me off..saying he didnt want to risk pregnancy and didnt want his friends thinking he stole me but had Also said he didnt care what his friends thought?? But he cared what his family thought but also said that he knows his family loves me but he doesnt want his family especially his mom to be upset. I explained to him that i was confused that i thought if you’re happy then your family should be happy for you and not to care what people think of you because im sure your mom felt the same way and now shes happy( shes 40 something her boyfriend is 20) and everyone is happy for her because she deserved better than her ex husband. One week i was gone to my moms while there house was getting fixed. I got a message from his mom saying her kids ( she has 6)..saw me and her son cuddling on the couch together…which was know by us that the kids saw but the friend never said anything about moving or getting up so the kids wouldnt see so i thought it was ok. Even the boyfriend of the mom saw us and had said you dont have to hide it from me i wont say anything to my girl. Anyways i told the friend what his mom sent me and he said not to say anything. So i did that.i kept my mouth shut and took the blame saying im sorry i didnt mean to disrespect you etc. Later on my husband called saying he wanted to tell me stuff that will benefit me if i told the truth about if me and his friend were doing anything or together. I told him and he told me that they were siding with both of talking bad about each of us to each other. Calling me a whore and other bad names over social media and spreading lies about me that i swear to god are not true. The family kicked me out and i havnt talked or seen the friend in almost 3months. After this long story my question is after doing all of this why do i still have those feelings for him and does he still feel the same way about me? I keep having dreams and he pops up in my head every single day. Ive heared he talking to a girl he was talking to before me but they stopped talking before cause she was mean and rude and wemt through his phone when they wernt even together. Ive seen his social media and they dont seem to have amy kind of relationship showing at least not that i know of and he had always told me no matter what even if i was mad he be there for me…i want to know if that still applies and I want to know if i should reach out to him to find out so i can have closure and move on so my mind is at ease or just leave it alone? Ps ive gotten back with my husband and im giving it my all 100% to make this marriage work but i feel like itll never be the same..especially if there a possibility that me and his friend could be something. I need to figure this out and be honest ….All iI ask is for advice please. What do i do???

  • kng2505

    Me and my boyfriend of five years broke up in December. It was kind of a breakdown for me. I got scared that our relationship was going no where so I thought if we broke up he would think it was over and realize that I am what he wants. Same for me, I thought it would help us be stronger to have time apart. Instead I find out only a few weeks after our breakup he’s seeing someone new. Now I won’t lie, I went on a few dates and tried conversations with new guys, but none of them were him. Looking back on how I ended it I don’t completely agree with how I ended things. I completely ignored him, wouldn’t speak to him without being kind of grouchy. I practically made him think I was over it. But now that he’s talking to this new girl he is doing the same thing to me. Won’t return my messages or calls. How do I handle this? I love him and I wanted to talk to him in person in hopes we could maybe talk about starting things again…

  • Britney Cole

    My boyfriend and I broke up and then after like 2 days he has another girlfriend. She is obviously a rebound. Well my ex wants me back but he couldn’r break up with his rebound because that girl is his bff’s relative and he doesnt want to destroy his relationship with his bestfriend. But he’s telling me that he really do loves me i just have to wait for him and let him fix this. But it seems like he’s not doing anything about it. What will I do?

  • Sara Silva

    My boyfriend and I came down to Florida to get sober from using heroin about 6-7 months ago. We’ve been together for about 6-7 years and we’ve been using heroin together for about 3 1/2 years. He had a lot of court issues so he desperately needed to get clean this time so he could get his sentence shortened for jail or prison. Within the first month he was able to get clean and stay clean, so now he’s been clean for about 6-7 months and moved back to our home state about a month ago. I on the other hand, relapsed after 3 weeks from being in Florida. For about 4-5 months he begged me to go back to rehab but I kept going into a program and leaving within the first couple of weeks. About a month and a half ago he told me he still loved me but couldn’t take it anymore. He was leaving for our home state the next day and told me he didn’t want to speak to me anymore because I wasn’t clean and that I needed to get clean in order for him to talk to me again. Now, this is the man that tried to get me pregnant many many times and told me right before we left for Florida, that he wanted to marry me as soon as we get clean and move back home… He treated me like a queen and I treated him like a king…About a month ago he stopped talking to me completely.. I tried texting him sooo many times but he won’t answer me at all. I know he didn’t block me because I hear the phone ring like 7 times before it goes to voicemail.. It’s like he fell off the face of this planet. He literally won’t answer me at all… Even when I tell him that I’m gonna kill myself (I have an extensive history with suicide in which I wound up in the hospital several times and he’s well aware of that situation) Soo I decided about a month and a half ago to log into his facebook without him knowing and I wound up seeing him having conversations with about 5 really pretty girls… One of them, I knew and when I read it, all it was, was him talking shit about me… Nothing horrible but basically him just bitching about the wrong things Ive done in our relationship. I also noticed that they had those conversations about a 2 months after I decided to bail out of rehab the first time, so at that time I only hung out with him once within 2-3 months, so it was pretty close to our recent move to Florida together.. I thought that was very soon for him to start trying to get over me already.. Especially after being together for so damn long.. And after he decided not to answer me about a month and a half ago at the beginning of September, my cousin messaged me to show off her new breast implants (she looks sort of like me except now she has big ass boobs. She’s also very conceded and always tries to talk and act like she’s way better than me) She then told me that my ex was texting her talking to her about me… Not good things either. He was saying to her how unfaithful, untrustworthy, how much of a liar I am and how I recently started looking “terrible” and that I gained a lot of weight and that he just doesn’t like me anymore. (Just a side note, not to sound conceded but I think I’m still very pretty and although I gained a little weight, it’s mostly in my ass and thighs so Im just a little “thick” I still have a thin stomach and nice body over-all) She also preceded by telling me that he stated he wanted to gain her respect and apologized to her for being a dick to her for our entire relationship (mind you, he’s stated about a thousand times how much he hated her guts and thought she was a stupid whore and she felt the same about him) So I’m very confused as to why he would say something like that.. He’s a good looking guy too.. but let’s just say that a lot of my family and friends and even strangers have asked me why such a beautiful girl like me was with such an “ugly dirt bag like him”…. I don’t think that about him at all, I think he’s really handsome actually (but hey, beauty is in the eye of the beholder).. But now he’s acting like he’s God’s gift to the universe and that he’s too good for me and acting like he deserves someone better and someone who’s “really hot, like him” Now I just found out that he’s going to serve time in either jail or prison. Im not sure which one because I don’t know how much time he’s serving exactly… He hasn’t talked to me so I havent been able to find out… So I’m suspecting he’s emotionally distraught about going away for a while… Can someone please give me their insight on this… When I called from a random number about 3 weeks ago, I asked him if he still loved me and he said very angrily, yes but I’m not talking to you until you have some clean time. Stop worrying about me and worry about yourself.. you dont love yourself and Im doing my own thing right now so you need to get help and fix your life.So I really don’t know. I havent tried contacting him for about a week and a half now and he hasn’t tried contacting me so I’m still left in the dark… someone please help me understand what’s going on… And if I should hope for us to be together in the future or if I should just forget about ever being with him again… Its been almost 7 years with him so Im completely shaken with the thought that I won’t ever be with him again.. Mind you, he was amazing and loving boyfriend when we were together… He didn’t seem like he was faking his love… Especially those times when Id see him after work or when I haven’t seen him all day and his face would just light up with love… It didn’t seem fake at all..Oh and I have to add one last thing!! Please do not judge me either… But since my heroin habit is very expensive I had to resort to being an escort for the last 2 years which my ex was never happy about but he stayed with me through it because about half a year ago he was very addicted as well and let my profession slide since it put a roof over our head, food on the table and drugs in our system…But ever since he got clean, he DID NOT want me doing this anymore… Since he didn’t want to leave rehab with me I wound up finding a friend down here that helps me out with getting hotel rooms and my dope… He is about 5 years older than me and black (sooo you know what that means) But that’s not really the point, he’s just a friend to me and I DO NOT sleep with him or do anything sexual with him.. But obviously my loving and extremely jealous boyfriend wouldn’t believe me… Especially since I was a little bored in rehab and accidentally let someone kiss me and flirt with me in front of EVERYONE… So it eventually got back to him in his rehab in the house right behind mine.. I mean he forgave me for that… But still… He doesn’t trust me, especially since my black friend lives with me at the moment and I use his phone constantly since I don’t have one… I’m sorry this was soooo long, I just had to add in every detail so you guys can understand the entire situation… It’s very confusing , obviously, I guess that’s why I’m extremely confused as well at this point… It might seem simple, oh just get clean then! But there are other things in this story that are pointing in the opposite direction.. Especially with my cousin telling me that I should get over him because he doesn’t love me and he never did and that I need to get over it already and that Im pathetic because he doesn’t give a crap about me anymore (especially now that she’s best friends with him!! And that he wants to earn her respect so much because she’s more beautiful than me and has a way better personality: sarcasm) Btw she’s done this with every single one of my ex’s through out my entire life! lol What do you think guys… Help a broken hearted girl out… Should I just get over him asap or should I give it time, learn to love myself, fix my life and break my habits so that I can hope for a family and a continuing love between him and I in the future? 🙂 🙂 🙂

  • Nicole

    My boyfriend, 25, and I, 21, had been dating for almost four years, things had been going great, we’d been talking about getting engaged and had been looking at rings and really wanted to spend our futures together, until a year ago his sister and her boyfriend got engaged, and after that happened I got really jealous and mean towards them. Eventually my boyfriend got sick of all the negativeness towards them, but his sister and I have made up since then, and decided that a ‘break’ would be best for us so he can figure out if he really wants to be with me or not. He broke up with me august of this year and started talking/hanging out with a girl, who is younger than me,20, right after that. Exactly a month later they were Facebook official, and no one had even known that we broke up. We still have an apartment together, he stays at his parents house but also all his stuff is still at our apt, and bills together so we still need to communicate for that reason. He came over the 1st time to give me some money and we talked for awhile and he came out and told me that he still thinks about me and is really confused out his feeling and he’s not sure if he made the right decision, the second time he came over he was there for almost 4 hours!!…He also tells me that he lies in his bed at night and still thinks about the good times we’ve had together…

  • Lucia

    My Ex Boyfriend and I started dating after a few weeks we told each other how we felt,after he asked me out I was really happy knowing I was with someone like him …when if got to four weeks in our relationship he asked me if we could go on a break because he had family issues and he didn’t want to hurt me by shouting at me and saying things so I let the break go on ..one day I got my phone I facebooked him my mobile number like I told him I was going to when I got my phone , and then during that time he dumped me saying he couldn’t do the relationship anymore and it wasn’t my fault ,saying I was an amazing person and any guy is lucky to have me .
    But when me and him were not talking his mate kept on messaging me and we gotten talking .after a few months his friend asked me out and I said yes,only because I wanted to get close to my other Ex ,so when this happend halfway through the month I found out my other Ex ,wanted me back and was still in love with me ..so I asked him and then he said he got rid of his feelings when I got with his mate ..Since college started I’ve noticed my other Ex the one that I want to get back with before I went out with his friend I’ve seen him looking at me all the time ,and when I was with a guy friend ive seen him staring at me and so has my friends seen it too .I don’t know if what he’s doing means he misses me likes me or wants me back ?

  • yomainchik

    I was in love with this guy for the longest time, and february last year we became friends. After about 6 months of being friends he asked me out and we were taking things slow before becoming an official couple, however one month later things ended bc my family hates him… But it’s weird. Whenever I go to college I pass his workplace and he makes an excuse to just come out of the door, we and stare at each other for long periods of time almost all the time (as though it were a movie). However I saw him 2 days ago and he left his work to go up the road while I was going down but as soon as he saw me he almost sprinted back inside. Help!?

  • Claire

    My ex and I have been in no contact for weeks. He cut the connection between us.But doesnt delete our pictures on Instagram and Facebook posts. Is it possible that he’s stalking me?

  • Anita

    Hi, well my story is preety messed up. we had been together for 3 years and a half , we broke up and got back together alot of times, I cheated , he cheated we decided it was worth it to continue,even one time we broke up he had another girlfriend and broke up with her so we would get back together. this time he broke up with me blaming me because of the past saying that thats why it ended. We give a dance class together, found out that he cheated on me with one of our students. and he is still with her in my face they always kiss. last saturday I slaped him because he told me he really cared about her , when a week before he said the opposite, he even said I love you a week before that. I still have to see them this month because we have a big event so the no contact rule is preety rough for me, and now in every class he treats me with anger and he is not like indiferrent to see me he just gets like mad, so I think he still feels something even if he is in another relationship… Any help?

  • cathy

    So my X and i have a complicated past. We kinda knew each other growing up in a small town. I went on with my life. At 29 with a marriage and two kids. Different town. New years. My then husband and i were at a club. I literally locked eyes with this guy. That was it he came over, said hi to both of us (he knew both of us from 12 years ago) but even though we were both with other people, i just knew. My already horrible marriage made it easy to have an affair. So we carried that on for a year. He saw someone else, i was still married/seperated. It wasnt the right time. I moved on. He left town. This is 10 years later now. I have had on and off contact with him FB mostly. I am married to an amazing man. I cant shake my X. Im drawn to him. We are 2200 km away from each other, 10 years has passed, i tell myself im being stupid but i cant stop. He accidentally called me couple times. There are “I love you’s” “what did you do to me that i cant shake this” “He is a player”…..but when he tells me “I’m contemplating my life” and “We should gave been together”…..I just Love him. WTF DO I DO!

  • cathy


  • Jess R

    Hi there! I would like some advice. I’m trying to figure out if my ex is using me or truly still has feelings. We broke up about a month and a half ago because we jumped into things and they were moving really fast so we decide to stay friends. We’ve hung out twice since and they have been nothing but amazing however both times ended with sex. Last night he took me out to dinner, gave me a massage, put lotion on my sunburn, hung out talking for hours, and I ended up staying the night and sleeping with him. In the morning he woke me up to kiss me good bye when he left for work and I stayed at his place and went back to sleep. My friends think he’s just using me because neither one of us has a car so I take a 30 minute bus ride to go see him because he has to wake up for work at 3am for work every morning so it gives us more time together if I go there plus I live with my parents. I think him making time since he’s the one that always asks to hang out and all the things he does for me is effort enough. Thoughts? Thank you

  • samantha

    My ex says to me that he like a girl but its to try to get over me but he says its not working what does that mean

  • April Parker

    still love my ex boyfriend he tell me he loves me i think he was cheating on me cause he had a girldfriend i won kill him so bad we dont talk much he tell me he likes me as a friend i tell him i dont want be no friends with you then he tell me leave him alone but me and him need to talk cause looks like he have a dam promblem everytime i see him we is start to fight evrytime i see him he is look mad for no reason they need to leave my ex boyfriend alone still love him tho still haave feelings for him but i is won talk to him so bad thats myboyfriend i cant move on when he be with orthers girl i is won kill him so bad making me jeosleous

  • Prettylover

    He isn’t over with you. Why he will call you even if he has a girlfriend. I think his GF now is a rebound ?

  • Kylie Adams

    My ex boyfriend wants to be friends. However, we broke up due to arguing quite alot. We have broken up once before which was my decision, but we then got back together and everything was going perfectly. I hate that he has now left me, because he says im ‘to perfect for him’ and that ‘I can do better’. But he is all I want. He doesn’t talk to any other girls and tells me that he cares about me. I constantly try my hardest to make him jealous, but he doesn’t bother contacting me. He has also recently said that he ‘misses me too’. What should I do? I really want him back!

  • Guest

    ok my ex say he loves me and gone block me on face book and a orther girl come to my chat and tell me leave him alone like everyday i see this boy who i like and always be with his friends and he tell me on facebook he is go with this girl but she say she is go out with denigno caroll but he is still my boyfriend tho still love him he tell me dont go round him

  • Dee Riley

    It sounds like I would let him go on ahead about his business, he’s in love with his ex, and he likes something about you. They probably don’t get along because he’s promiscuous, and whatever else….I smell trouble, trouble….Good Luck with that