8 Signs Your Standards Are Too High When It Comes To Dating

In the latest episode of The Mindy Project (do you watch it? if not, start NOW), Mindy’s friends accuse of her of being too picky when it comes to dating. Of course, this makes Mindy totally freak out and so she goes on a date with a dude who is obviously really wrong for her, just to prove to her friends that her standards are not too high (I won’t spoil the end for you). The episode made me think: what is the difference between being way too picky and simply having high standards?

I kind of hate when people say someone is “too picky” just because they have standards. I consider myself a pretty open person – I don’t really have a type and I’ve given all sorts of guys chances, some that worked out and some that didn’t. But I do have a few standards and, once, when I rejected a guy for not meeting them, a friend rolled her eyes and said I had to stop being so picky. It really bothered me. Sometimes, people just aren’t attracted to someone or they don’t like something about someone – that’s not a bad thing! You don’t have to say yes to every dude who asks you out. You can pick and choose!

So, I think it’s great to have standards – it’s very important to know what you want out of a relationship in order to have a fulfilling one. But at the same time, I think it’s also really important to be open to dating people who aren’t your usual “type.” Being open to new people can sometimes lead you to some awesome experiences and being too closed off can hurt you sometimes. Here are 8 signs that your standards are too high: 

Do you think your standards are too high? Has anyone ever told you that you were too picky? Do you have a specific type? Tell us in the comments.


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  • Ruben

    Wow what a men hater

  • BethRFinch

    I don’t disagree. If you like men better than women, then that’s who you should be with. Nothing wrong with that.

  • Wes

    Im definitely too picky. I agree with this article.

  • Grant

    You are right Gurl. Just read an article on the very same thing at http://yourejustadumbass.com/2015/02/03/want-love-stop-doing-dumb-shit-that-gets-you-no-one/ This is becoming a huge problem.

  • kate

    Wow, reading this only reaffirmed that despite rejecting tons of guys, I am actually not picky at all. I just have a pretty fair set of standards. None of the guys were right for me and that’s exactly what the little voice inside of my head was telling me. Don’t feel bad for rejecting guys, girls! Just trust what your gut tells you!

    • jab7168 .

      are you commensurate with your standards, why would a top tier man want you?

  • Nazi Ned

    Heil Hitler!

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  • Rose

    OH MY GOD thank you Jessica! I need to show this list to my girlfriends because they have a VERY high standard. Like if the guy is too “short” or too “fat” they don’t want to date him! And that’s really unfair! I hate to say this, i love my girls to death but maybe there’s a reason they’ve never had a boyfriend in 23 years, you know??

    Prince Charming doesn’t really exist. There are tons of great guys out there, they just never give any of them a chance!

  • muzii

    I know I’m really picky, but not about what a guy does and doesn’t have. I’m extremely picky about how I feel around them. If I feel the slightest bit awkward and uncomfortable (not like, first time meeting someone kind of awkward, but more the idk if i really want to talk to this person kind of awkward) then I don’t want to be with them. Also, I’m highly sarcastic, so if they cant take my sarcasm and hand it back to me, I can’t be with them. Ive tried dating someone that didnt and I just couldnt…i got SOOOOO bored. Its helped me in a lot of ways in that I don’t fall for the first guy to bat his eyes at me, but at the same time its hard for me to find people im THAT comfortable around within the first few times i hang out with them because I have social anxiety so its difficult for me to connect with people in general. Pretty sure I just got lucky with my current relationship.

    • Wes

      Doubt it.