Very important research has discovered that women who have butts that are larger than average are healthier and have more intelligence. The study found that ladies with big butts tend to have lower levels of cholesterol are more likely to produce hormones that metabolize sugar – so these women are less likely to have diabetes or heart problems. Also, big butts come hand-in-hand with an excess of Omega 3 fats, which help with brain development, which explains why researchers found that children born to women with bigger butts are intellectually superior to children born to less curvy women.
And it doesn’t stop there! Researchers also found that big butts “favor” leptin levels and dinopectina in the female body. Leptin is the hormone that regulates weight and dinopectina is known for a few healthy things including anti-diabetic attributes.
Basically? It’s a pretty great time to be proud of your big butt.
Which brings me to my story: I have a big butt (and I cannot lie. SORRY I couldn’t resist!) and even though I used to hate it, I have learned to love and embrace it. In fact, my butt is probably my favorite physical feature. I like how it fills out my jeans and looks in dresses and a lot of the time, it makes me feel more confident in whatever I’m wearing. It’s also something I’ve always had to deal with, so it feels like, I don’t know, a defining feature for me. And, I’m not going to lie, my butt has gotten me many compliments, which is always a nice perk.
But truthfully, I wasn’t always a fan of my larger behind. When I was a kid, I hated my butt. There were many reasons why. It was always sticking out. I looked different than the other little girl’s my age. It made finding the right size jeans really difficult. And honestly, I wanted to be skinnier than I was and having a big butt made that feel impossible. This sounds very sad, but don’t worry, I’ve gotten over it.
One memory that always stands out when I think about how much I hate my butt is from when I used to go to ballet class. I took several different dance classes for seven years through middle school and high school, but nowhere else did my butt stand out as much as it did in ballet class. Forced to wear a skimpy leotard and tights, I had nothing to cover my (what felt like huge) butt with. I couldn’t tie a sweatshirt around my waist (that was still cool back then, okay?). I couldn’t hide in bulky sweats. I couldn’t sit in the back of class. My butt stood out, because it naturally stuck out, but also because my leotard never fit perfectly. #Bigbuttproblems
For the entire hour of each and every ballet class, I would stare in the mirror and try to mentally flatten my butt using some sort of telekinetic superpower I wished I had. I would look at the other tiny, slimmer girls, skipping around the room with flat little butts that didn’t make them look ridiculous. I was so jealous of these girls that I spent the majority of class staring at their butts, which in retrospect, is very creepy and weird. But I couldn’t help it. Why DID my butt stick out so much? Why was I the only one like this? I would NEVER be a dancer with this butt, I thought. Never mind the fact that I’m just not a great dancer… it was my butt that was holding me back.
In school, hiding my butt was easier because of jeans and long shirts and stuff like that. But once I got to high school and started getting a little bit more into fashion, it became harder to hide the true size of my butt. By the way, my butt isn’t even abnormally large. I know I’m making it seem that way, but it’s really just sort of big – it’s not like Kim Kardashian big. I’m just dramatic.
Anyway, at some point, I don’t remember exactly when, I started embracing my butt. Maybe it was when my crush told me that my butt was exactly the thing that attracted him to me in the first place (so sweet and sentimental, I know). Maybe it was because a few of my friends were complaining about their smaller butts and telling me how lucky I was and I had never thought about my butt that way. Maybe it was because Jennifer Lopez and her shapely butt became famous and I was like OMG, big butts can be hot! Or maybe it was because I stopped caring about my butt because I was too busy focusing on the other things I couldn’t control about my body, like acne and periods and cramps.
At any rate, I started to appreciate my big butt. But that’s not to say that I don’t still have some issues with it. Buying jeans is really, really difficult because my waist is smaller than my hips and butt – this means that I always have an awkward gap going on at the top of my jeans. It’s also hard to find bathing suit bottoms that fit without being too revealing. I like my butt, but I’m not so comfortable showing it off in that way. Long shirts or tunics never drape right on my body because my butt sticks out too much. And, much like dealing with unwanted cleavage, I don’t feel comfortable wearing tight skirts or dresses to work because they fit so tightly in that area. Also, I have to deal with a lot of icky comments from creepy dudes, which I’m sure we’ve all experienced.
But at the end of the day, I’m happy to say that I’m pretty proud of my butt. I’ve embraced it and I’ve learned how to dress for my curves so that I compliment them rather than try to hide them. I love that my butt makes me feel more confident (and apparently makes me more healthy). Embrace your own booty, whatever size it is!
Do you feel the same way about your own butt? Can you relate to my story? What’s your favorite physical feature about yourself? Tell me in the comments.