Last night, I was sitting in my apartment binge-watching Felicity on Netflix and decided to I needed to paint my nails. But this was before I showered and washed the dishes and got ready for bed. I realized I made a colossal mistake since I had so much to do, and I was left helpless with wet nails.

You can’t do anything when your nails are wet! It’s awful. You can’t even pee! And they always take way longer to dry when you paint them compared to when you go to the nail salon.

Here’s why painting my nails totally ruins my life:

Everything starts out just peachy.

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You successfully painted your nails perfectly.

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But then you realized how much you have to do.

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It’s okay, though. You can do this.

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You have to walk around like so:

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You essentially can’t touch anything.

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You have to be super gentle.

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You have to type very slowly.

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Your friend asks you to hang out, and you’re just like:

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Forget about getting your pants on or off.

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You have to get creative to scratch an itch.

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Then you smudge a nail.

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So you try to chill out and fix it.

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And you decide you’re not going to move until they’re totally dry.

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Success!

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And then you chip a nail the next day.

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I should have painted my nails instead of going on this blind date

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