Losing Your Virginity May Not Be A Big Deal!


Losing your virginity may not be a big deal in the long run. | Source: ShutterStock

Losing your virginity seems like it’s supposed to be some big, huge, cathartic event in your life. You hear so much about it all the time and how it’s so serious and intense . . . so what happens if you lose your virginity and it’s, well, not any of those things?

When I lost my virginity, my boyfriend at the time and I had been together a few months. He didn’t know I was a virgin, and I didn’t tell him because it wasn’t really an issue for me. I hadn’t been saving myself for marriage or anything, but I simply didn’t want to sleep with someone I wasn’t in a relationship with–and he just happened to be my first real boyfriend. In any case, we’d messed around a bit before, but never gotten too hot and heavy. But we both agreed we were ready for it and I made plans for me to sleep over that night. I’d been on the pill for a while for period issues anyway, and he had condoms handy, so I knew we’d be safe.

So what happened? He grabbed dinner, saw a movie and started making out at his house when it was over–and then he asked if I wanted to go to the bedroom. We made our way there, did everything we’d already done before . . . and that sort of just led to having sex.

I was mentally preparing myself for something scary and emotionally taxing and magical all at the same time. But it wasn’t any of that. For me, as lame as it sounds, it was just something else to do. I didn’t feel any different when it was over, and I didn’t feel like my life nor like my relationship had changed in some drastic way afterward. My boyfriend didn’t act any different and I still felt like myself. Maybe a slightly sorer version of myself, but I felt like myself.

For some people, their first time is this huge ordeal, whether in an awesome or an awful way. And that’s great (or not-so-great) for them. But for a lot of us, it’s much simpler. Mine? It was nice. But it was nothing to blog about (even though I just did), so don’t feel weird if yours wasn’t either.

Did you feel like your first time was a big deal? Was losing your virginity a life changing experience for you or just sort of “eh?” Tell us in the comments!


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  • Siam

    You should wait for a boyfriend who really cares about you and will have future plan with you and a virgin. We bangladeshies think so…