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That’s happened to me also. My best friend growing up dated my first serious boyfriend after we broke up, and it completely wrecked our friendship.
All of this falls under the unwritten rules of the “Girl Code,” which is just filled with gray area. I didn’t have to tell my friend that I hooked up with this guy, especially since it wasn’t a big deal to either of us and we don’t have feelings for each other. But if I didn’t tell her and she found out from him or someone else, that would have changed things.
The fact that I was upfront about it and said something to her right away made it a non-issue. I told her that as her friend, I thought she deserved to know. And she did!
When it comes to exes and your friends, there’s so much that can go wrong. In the case of my ex and my BFF, she didn’t tell me. They secretly dated for months before I found out, and it felt horrible! I felt betrayed. He could have said something, but we didn’t talk after we broke up so why would he talk to me then? It was her duty as my friend to come to me before anything even happened to make sure I was okay with it, which I wasn’t.
I think in the case of exes and friends, your ex should have the decency not to go after your friends. But things happen, and this is a pretty common problem. If you do find out your ex has a thing for one of your friends, I would talk to your friend about it if she doesn’t come to you first.
Going through your ex is the wrong move, especially if y’all don’t talk anymore. Sure, you could go to him and say that it’s making you uncomfortable and you don’t like it, but y’all are broken up. You don’t have ties to him anymore, and he doesn’t necessarily owe you an explanation for anything.
But you do have ties with your friend. Talk to your friend and let her know how you’re feeling. Explain that while you can’t tell her who she can and can’t date, it would really hurt you if she got together with your ex. Let her know that it would jeopardize your friendship if it happened. If she really cares about you, she’ll take your feelings into consideration.
Has your ex ever fallen for one of your friends? What did you do? Tell us in the comments!
And here’s your complete guide to stop thinking about your ex!
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Yes, its happening right now actually. My class was on a field trip (Me and my BF broke up 4 days ago) We were hiking on this trail, my Ex and friend were walking together in front of me ALL day. When he’d text she’d put her arm around him, or on his love handles, or rub his back so he wouldn’t fall. They flirted and secretly texted each other when they were right next to each other. I wanted to cry.