How Does Watching Porn Really Impact Your Sex Life?

The subject of watching porn always garners a lot of debate. Some people think porn is natural and actually healthy, something that is really no big deal. Others feel like watching porn is a form of cheating. Even researchers seem to have different ideas about pornography – a few past studies have given us the idea that watching porn can negatively affect our sex lives.

But new research proves something totally different. (Not to go off on a tangent or anything, but why are studies constantly contradicting themselves? Is any study real, ever? How do we know what’s true and what’s not? I’m too tired for this.) A study done on over 4,5000 men and women between the ages of 15 and 25 looked at pornography use and sexual experiences. Researchers found that only 0.3 percent to 4 percent of the “risky sexual behaviors” those studies displayed were connected to porn use.

In other words? If you thought that watching porn makes dudes have higher expectations for women when it comes to doing stuff in the bedroom, you’d be wrong. This study shows that watching pornography doesn’t impact our sex lives that way. Just because guys (or girls) are watching porn doesn’t mean that they expect to see what happens in porn happen in real life.

Gert Martin Hald, a clinical psychologist and the lead author of the study, told HealthDay that “pornography is not as big and bad a wolf as we thought it was and maybe we should focus on other factors. It explains a portion of sexual behavior, but it is modest.”

This isn’t the first time I’ve heard this defense against porn in the last few weeks. A little while ago, I told you guys about a class on pornography that attempts to get rid of the stigma surrounding it. That professor had similar things to say about porn – that it isn’t as evil as some people think it is. He strives to get us to see porn in a different light and to not be so intimidated by it.

I have to agree with this study. I think porn is more innocent than it sometimes seems. I don’t think all guys or girls watch porn because they are unhappy with their sex life or because they’re looking for something they’re not getting. I mean, I’m sure some people watch porn for this reason, but I don’t think the majority do. I think people watch porn because, I don’t know, they like it. It’s fun. It passes time. It gets them off. Whatever. I don’t think they’re watching it because they wish their girlfriend would do the things porn stars would do. And that’s why I don’t think there’s a big reason to be jealous of your boyfriend watching porn (unless he’s replacing sex with porn. Then he has a problem).

I know that a lot of you girls have an issue with your BF or your crush or anyone watching porn and I get it. I used to be uncomfortable with my first boyfriend watching porn. It sort of made me feel threatened, I guess. But since that relationship, I’ve started thinking of porn in a different way. And, who knows, maybe this study will help you see porn in a different light – it’s not something that’s really affecting our sex lives (according to this study).

I’m not saying that you have to be like, “YEAH PORN” and start watching it with your BF and encouraging him to watch it. I just think it’s important to keep in mind that when your partner is watching porn, it’s not something you should take personally. 

Are you okay with your partner watching porn? Do you watch porn? Do you think it affects your sex life? Tell us in the comments!

 

Should you be worried about your BF watching porn?

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  • Ashley

    Well, I myself watch porn and get off during my alone time some times, so I’m sure my bf probably does too. Would it bother me to find his porn stash? No, but it might be one of those moments where I would mutter “awkward …” l0l!

  • Stan

    My GF likes to watch porn as much as I do, at least once a week! WE try some of the stuff we see. For instance, my GF will perform oral on me and the swallow. She will let me shoot on her face and on her breasts. Then we have intercourse. Because of porn, we have tried and ENJOYED anal intercourse! Porn is good for us and we both love it!!

  • Gicelle

    I usually have a ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ understanding, lol

  • Kitty

    I don’t know if my boyfriend watches porn or not. I feel like he probably does or has. A young man who does have some idea of sex without ever having had any… seems likely ;). However, I don’t care in the slightest. *I* used to (had to stop when I started sharing a computer again…), and I am not gonna be a hypocrite about it :)

    I am not one to judge, but I am curious… Girls who are uncomfortable with their partners watching porn, why do you feel this way? I understand it feels uncomfortable for them to get off to naked women other than yourself, but… can you see the similarities to you obsessing (I’m using this word lightly/with a grain of salt) with attractive actors/celebrities? I feel like your partners are just slightly more sexual about it, and that shouldn’t be as worrisome as it is made out to be.

    I’d love to hear some more in depth reasons for this discomfort, I am quite honestly curious. I’ve heard the “feels like cheating”, but… if you feel like answering, can you take a quick step back and really think about it? Again, I am very curious about this.

    Peace,
    Kitty :*

  • Jay

    I personally don’t care if my boyfriend watches porn although since we have been together (a year now) he only will watch it if I say I don’t mind and I’m not in “the mood” but honestly I don’t need him to check in. There are times when we both watch it together its a great way to get us both aroused and sometimes even learn something new.

  • Savagegrl

    My boyfriend doesn’t watch porn anymore, cause he has me. lol but I really don’t think I would mind if he did still watch it, guys had it before they got into a relationship, so why not let them keep it? I watch Hentai btw ;)

  • Sally

    My bf and I always watch porn together it’s actually kinda sexy watching him masterbate to porn. I think you just have to find the right kind for you and be confident in yourself to know that it’s healthy for men espesially to watch porn. You can’t take it too personal. Plus it helps to experiment with porn or to watch female freindly porn and see what you’d like to be done to you and suggest it to your partner. If porn makes you uncomfortable then talk to your partner about it if they do watch it and figure out what you can do together to get on the same page.

  • Leah

    I found porn on my boyfriends computer and to be honest, I didn’t take it very well. I didn’t think that knowing that he’s watching and getting turned on by other naked girls would bother me this much. I do think it has to do with my confidence and body issues. I wish I wouldn’t have taken it so personally (because I know it’s not) but its stuck in my head. I cant be the only girl feeling this way?

    • Amy

      no youre not trust me I think my bf is worst he has a whole page of links he loves to watch of hot naked woman and over 45 names of porn starts I actually was furious and felt like slapping the teeth out of his mouth…it might be my own insecurities but seriously fuck him he has me I don’t think it has anything to do with that I think it has to do with the fact hes watching half naked woman with a pair of double D boobs naked and hot and hes “getting off” with watching someone else even though he’ll never have these woman its like a slap in the face. I give him sex and now in your free time he wants to watch someone else I really want to say well you and your hand have a great time tonight because if you touch me im breaking your hand off and smacking you in the face with it. Im sorry for the rant but I actually just found a ton of porn on his computer and I want to beat his face in with a shovel.

  • SmileyVamp

    I’m very aware that my bf masturbates to porn. I honestly don’t care. I’ve actually suggested we watch some together sometime.

  • Bidisha Nath

    I m not so bothered with my bf watching porn. I too watch porn sometimes. In fact we even share porn videos sometimes! :p my bf gives me some really good videos at times!! Yeah lol!!! We laugh, talk etc abt wat we saw and all.. So i guess it should not be such a big deal after all to watch porn!! And on the important note we definitely dont expect either of us to be like any porn stars we see. And yeah our love life is awesome, no complains!! ^_^

    • Gicelle

      Wow! Good for you guys!

  • Tayylove96

    My boyfriend watches porn a lot and I don’t really care. He “gets off” on it too. He comes every now and then with new ideas to try just to see. At best we find something different and arousing to do, at worst it was funny to try. I don’t see the problem. My bf never turns me down for sex over porn. Sometimes we watch it together.