When it comes to faking an orgasm, it’s usually the ladies that get a bad rep. That may seem unfair, but let’s admit it – it’s kind of understandable. After all, when guys orgasm there is usually… evidence. When girls orgasm? Not so much. Therefore, it’s easier for women to get away with fake orgasms. As demonstrated by this scene in the classic movie When Harry Met Sally (watch it… now), it seems that all we have to do is squirm around and make some noises for it to be believable.
But maybe this assumption is a little bit more unfair than we originally thought. According to new research, guys do fake orgasms… and the reason why is pretty surprising. But we’ll get to that in a minute.
Dr. Abraham Morgentaler explores why guys fake orgasms in his new book Why Men Fake It: The Totally Unexpected Truth. It’s not because they want to get sex over with and it probably usually doesn’t happen when it’s a one-time hookup. According to this research, guys fake orgasms because they care about their partner more than they care about themselves. In other words, they want their partner to believe that they’re doing an amazing job, even if it’s really not working for them so much at the moment.
Even researchers were surprised by this finding. Dr. Morgentaler says that, “once a man is in a relationship, he seems to care more about his partner than himself. For every man who behaves badly, I can give you 10 who are dedicated and thoughtful and doing the best they know how to be a man and a solid partner.” This all makes sense, because the main reason anyone fakes an orgasm to begin with is because they don’t want to hurt their partner’s feelings.
Another reason men fake it is because they feel ashamed that they can’t finish. As the doctor says, guys sometimes “suffer a crisis of confidence about their masculinity.” If they can’t get to the finishing point, they may feel like there is something wrong with them, so they have to lie about it to seem more like a man. This is ridiculous. Obviously not everyone can orgasm during every single hookup and there’s nothing wrong with you if it happens!
So now I think the big question is… how exactly are men faking orgasms? Like I said before, when a guy orgasms, there’s evidence, so faking this seems like it’s pretty tricky. Unfortunately, researchers didn’t go into any of the ways dudes are getting around that little problem, but I’m assuming it’s not easy.
Have you ever witnessed a guy faking an orgasm? Have you ever faked an orgasm yourself? Would you be insulted if you found out your BF faked it? Tell us in the comments.