Have you ever felt like you should lose weight for your boyfriend because he wants you to? If so, you’re probably not alone. According to a new study, almost 60 percent of people in relationships want their partner to lose weight. And they’re not just talking a pound or two – almost all of them want their partner to lose at least a stone (which roughly translates to about 14 pounds). Ugh. This study is a major bummer.
Unfortunately, this does happen in real life. So what are you supposed to do if your boyfriend drops major hints that he wants you to drop a few pounds? What are you supposed to do if he just comes right out and tells you to lose weight? No one wants to be told they should go on a diet… especially if that unwanted advice comes from someone they love and want to impress. Saying that to someone (unless their life literally depends on losing weight) comes out mean, superficial and degrading, no matter how nice you try to make it sound. And it stinks.
Here’s the deal: unless, like I said, your life is in jeopardy, your boyfriend should never ask you to lose weight for him. Ever. It’s rude, it’s mean and it’s not cool. A relationship is not all about looks – as corny as it may sound, your boyfriend should love you for who you are, not how much you weigh.
Even if you’ve gained some weight (and that can be normal when you start a new relationship), that still doesn’t give him the right to criticize you for it. Sometimes our weight fluctuates – there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m not saying you should go out and eat chips until you gain 15 pounds, no big deal, but gaining a little weight over the course of some time is nothing to beat yourself up over.
If your BF asks you to start hitting the gym, take a minute to think and try to stay confident. I know that can be a pretty big blow, but if you’re honestly happy with yourself and your body, then what he thinks shouldn’t change that. Let him know that you’re perfectly fine with your weight and you don’t appreciate what he just said. If you keep your self-esteem up and tell him off, he might figure out on his own that he’s being a jerk.
Should you break up with him over a comment like that? Maybe – that’s your decision. But if your BF starts messing with your self-esteem, that may be a sign that it’s time for the relationship to end. Your boyfriend should be one of the people in your life who makes you feel good about yourself for who you are. You should feel comfortable in your own skin around him. If he makes you feel awkward and unattractive, then you shouldn’t be dating him.
Always keep in mind that if you decide to lose weight, you should be doing it for you and no one else. You should never try to change your body or yourself to make someone else happy. One, it will never work the way you want it to and two, that’s not going to make you happy and that’s what’s most important.
Has your BF ever told you to lose weight? Have you ever felt like you had to lose weight for a guy? Tell us in the comments.