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Hooking up can be kind of complicated sometimes and mistakes in bed are made by everyone at some point in their lives. Unfortunately, it’s pretty much unavoidable. It can be hard to figure out exactly the right way to act when you’re feeling naked and vulnerable.
Chances are, you’ve probably made a few mistakes of your own. In fact, you may be making them without even realizing it. In order to make your hookups the best they can be (hey, we look out for you at Gurl.com) and to avoid embarrassment, I’ve put together a list of 10 common mistakes women make in bed. Check ‘em out and keep them in mind for future hookups:
You're Not Confident
I've said this a million times, but it's true: guys dig confidence. If you're feeling down on yourself, it's going to show in the bedroom. Low self-esteem will not only affect your guy, but it will also make it harder for you to enjoy yourself since you're not feeling comfortable with yourself. Don't be afraid to shed your clothes, keep the lights on and let him see your body. Read this if you need some tips on boosting your confidence. Source: ShutterStockYou Stick To The Same Thing... Always
Maybe you've figured out what your partner likes and you've figured out what you like and so you just stick with those things to be safe. It's totally fine to have a fall-back move, but you should try switching it up sometimes. I'm not saying you have to experiment with anything crazy, but keep a hookup from being boring and predictable by trying new moves, saying new things or going to a new place. Source: ShutterStockYou Never Say What You Want
Sex is a two-way straight and that means you need to tell your partner what you want and what you like. He's not a mind-reader, so don't expect him to be. And don't think you're insulting him. Dudes love it when girls know what they want! Give him a little direction without being mean. You'll thank yourself later on. Source: ShutterStockYou Do Things That Make You Uncomfortable
Just like you should say what you want, you should also say what you don't like. You should never do something in bed just because your partner wants to or because you feel guilty saying no. Doing something uncomfortable isn't going to be enjoyable for you and is probably going to make you resent your partner a little bit. You should never be afraid to say no, no matter what he's asking for. Source: ShutterStockYou Don't Use Protection
Don't want to use a condom? Well then say hello to the big possibility of STDs, STIs and unplanned pregnancy. And no, I'm not being dramatic. You should always insist on using a condom no matter what, for your own safety as well as your partner's. Source: ShutterStockYou Call Him The Wrong Name
Calling someone by the wrong name is a major faux-pas, even if it is an honest mistake. Try to prevent this from happening by focusing on who you're with in the moment and not letting your thoughts wander too much. Also, if you're busy thinking about someone else the entire time you're getting busy? You might be hooking up with the wrong person. Source: ShutterStockYou Fake Orgasms
You should never fake an orgasm for many reasons. For starters, it's not going to help you get off in any way. You're only hurting yourself here! Also, if your dude finds out you're faking it, he's going to be extremely hurt. Stay away from a performance and instead tell your partner what will make you really orgasm. Source: ShutterStockYou Spend More Time Comparing Than Enjoying
When you're hooking up with someone, you should just be able to relax and enjoy the moment. After all, sex is all about feeling good, right? This isn't the time to compare your new man to your ex or to the last person you hooked up with. It also isn't the time to wonder if he's comparing you to someone else. Leave those insecurities behind and just focus on the moment. Source: ShutterStockYou Never Make The First Move
Your partner shouldn't be the only one who initiates a hookup - you can make the first move also! In fact, guys love when you do. I know it can be hard to overcome being shy, but I'm not saying you have to do anything over-the-top. Sometimes, just pulling him in for a kiss or getting a little touchy-feely is enough. Don't be afraid to be a little bit more outgoing. Source: ShutterStockYou Try To Act Like A Porn Star
Trying too hard is almost as bad as lying there like a lump on a log. Yes, guys are into porn and porn is all about dramatics. But that doesn't mean they expect you to act like a porn star. You don't need to talk super dirty, scream as loud as you can or dress up in elaborate costumes. I mean, if you guys are into that, fine. But don't make yourself feel like you need to put on a show in order to please your man. Source: ShutterStockHave you been making any of these mistakes? Have you ever made them? What are you going to do to change things? Tell us in the comments.
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Would You Rather?
Once I called a guy by my ex’s name. It was literally an act of God. I had never slept with my ex and because he was impotent (let me know way after we were into the relationship, after he said he loved me. The whole “waiting” thing was a ruse),, was one of the many reasons I dumped him. But the other guy…I wasn’t thinking about my ex, I was totally into what I was doing with that guy and BAM, it just came out. The both of them had the same initials (J) which is probably the reason. But I still think it was a real act of God. What was so wonderful about it (although scary and awful at the time) is that the guy flipped out in a bad way. It was borderline violent and I had to contact my neighbor and get away from him because he scared me. It quickly made me realize I was with a seriously awful person and luckily for me, I was able to get away from that horror show of a human. Turned out the guy really WAS a horror show in all kinds of ways (selling guns, druggie, racist, and routinely tries to latch onto women who will give him shelter, food, money, drugs etc.). I am so, so glad that happened because it really saved my life.