This is going to sound totally weird and antiquated, but it’s true: what you like in bed used to be taken into consideration when diagnosing someone with mental illness. And lo and behold, if what you like in bed is kinky sex? Until recently, you may have been considered crazy. But you’re not!
The American Psychiatric Association published a new edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (usually abbreviated as DSM, in this case, DSM-5). While before, stuff like spanking, fetishism, transvestism and S&M used to be considered a disorder, now kinky sex practices are only considered a mental disorder if you’re unhappy or stressed about them. (Bet Rihanna is breathing a sigh of relief right now, right?)
To give some perspective on how stuffy these people were before–homosexuality was once included. Obviously, it isn’t anymore!
There’s no “normal” standard for what you should or should do in bed, and as a result, what someone considers kinky sex could easily be construed as snoozeworthy sex for someone else. The fact that what you like in bed can be used to determine whether or not you’ve got a mental illness–provided whatever you’re doing is legal and with people who are legally able to give consent–seems to not really be about whether or not someone is actually sick, but about the weird, puritanical standards, judgment and discomfort with sexuality people have in general.
Who or what you like in bed is your business, period. If you and your partner (or partners, if that’s what you like in bed–no shame!) are happy, satisfied, communicative and honest–and not doing anything illegal or that you’re otherwise uncomfortable with–let your freak flag fly. Because chances are, it’s not nearly as freaky as you think it is.
Do you think that kinky sex is a sign of a disorder? Are you into kinky sex? Do you think what you like in bed should determine whether or not you have a mental illness? Do you think what you like in bed should be used to diagnose mental disorders? Have you ever been judged for what you like in bed? Tell us in the comments!