What You Had To Say About Losing Your Virginity

Earlier this week, we specifically shared things women wished they knew before having sex, but a lot of the time the comment sections are full of conversation about losing your virginity.

Whether you’re thinking about doing it or have already done it, the comments are full of advice, thoughts and personal stories related to the topic of virginity.

We’ve gone ahead and dug up a sample of some of the things that you all have shared with us and each other related to having sex for the first time. Have a look!

From “I Have Terrible Anxiety About Sex”

 

From “My First Time Having Perfect Sex”

 

From “From The Boards: Do Girls Really Get Attached To The Person They Lose Their Virginity To?”

 

From “Does Your First Time Having Sex Set The Tone For The Rest Of Your Sex Life?”

 

From “What Is Virginity?”

 

From “From The Boards: How Young Is Too Young To Lose Your Virginity?”

 

From “Reader Hookup Confession: I Planned On Waiting Until Marriage But…”

 

From “Confession: Waiting Until Your Ready”

 

From “My First Time Having Sex”

Do you have something you want to share about virginity? Tell us in the comments. 

 

Setting The Record Straight On Virginity Myths

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131 Comments

  1. avatarBloop says:

    I lost my virginity when I was 15 to my boyfriend of then 1 year+. It was actually by accident…and not by his penis.. We were at that time pretty sexually intimate but through oral sex and hand stuff but that was it. Then one day he was fingering me pretty vigorously when I suddenly felt this sharp pain inside but ignored it assuming it was probably just his nail accidentally rubbing against y’know. When he took his finger out though, it was covered with blood. I freaked out and was super embarrassed,thinking my period had come while we were at it…since it was about the time anyways.
    Recently when we tried to actually have sex, I expected a whole deal of pain but he just penetrated me.i was like wtf.since when did I lose my virginity…then I remembered^ so yea..

  2. avatarJaki Lowe says:

    I lost mine when I was 14 to a “boyfriend” of mine who I had grown up with as a neighbour. In our younger years, we used to go and play out in hay fields when the grass was long and had shown each other our “parts” when playing games which was a giggle. After a while he started to get erections and I was amazed at the difference in size between his soft and erect penis, and after a while I used to stroke it for him and used to watch it “twitch”. He did mention once or twice that he had started masturbating to ejaculation and would I like to watch him “cum” which I did and was amazed to see his fluid spurt out :-) I wanked him off a few times and I could detect when he was going to ejaculate owing to his penis getting rock hard and him convulsing when he was on finals. We did used to rub each other against each other, like his bell end along my pussy lips until I started to get wet. One day it went a bit further and as he was rubbing his bell end along my pussy lips he moved a bit closer and his bell end actually penetrated me. Just his bell end and no shaft. He immediately withdrew and ejaculated all over my legs. That was the first time I actually had a penis inside me, but only the tip and not the full shaft. After a while he moved away with his parents and I started having full sex with my new boyfriend. I sure wish I had had full sex with my young friend and he ejaculated inside me, but can’t turn back the clock

  3. avatarJosceliaP12 says:

    I lost my virginity to 2 guys and a girl. I agreed to have a foursome with my boyfriend, my bestfriend, and her boyfriend. First it just started with me and my boyfriend just makeing out half naked. My bra was UN hooked but I still had my underwear on. Then my bestfriend and her boyfriend. Came in and asked to join. I Wanted to say no., but they just barged in anyways and started to make out. After about 10 or15 mins. My bf and my bffs bf switched partner. So my bffs bf is on me and I was pretty weirded out,… then I got use to it and then everyone was naked. It was usually boy and girl, but then we were so into it… me and my bff was making out and figngering each other, while the boys just watched and masterbated. Then when it was enough. The glpenetration started .. The first couple of times it had a small bit if pain. Then the deeper he put t in.. The mire I fell in love with his penis. Then we switched partners again and again. We did so much all you could hear was moaning and the beds pounding and squeaking. And all we did was fuck and orgasm. I thought that was the best time of my life.I felt like I lost something and gained something. I lost my virginity and gained experience, and lots of stuff… But it was very weird. To know that I lost my virginity to 3 people including a girl… I don’t regret what I did. I remember that day like it was yesterday. But I wish I could have waited. :(

  4. avatarmeaghan says:

    I am 21 now but I was almost 13 when I lost my virginity. I was very very naive, had absolutely no idea about sex and extremely innocent which was probably a great turn on for the guys I had sex with. My first guy loved the “little school girl” look. I could tell he was absolutely turned on when I went to his place after school. He would refuse to let me take my school uniform off until it was time for him to penetrate me. He was a real hunk and a pretty cool guy who was way older than me. I know he used to travel abroad a lot and was in some kind of research thingy. He was also a rugby player and had such a bod!!! I was so infatuated with him and I got to know him through some friends of mine. He was hell bent on oral sex with me and he would spend hours making me orgasm and would get me to masturbate and teach me everything I had to know about sex. The sex was mind blowing and for naive me it was great because he took every precaution not to get me pregnant. I ddnt have a clue as to what to do. He had a perpetual hard on and I was the biggest turn on for him. He would spend hours making me orgasm repeatedly. To him watching me orgasm was a big turn on and he would get so “hard”
    My mom was busy with her new bf at that time. So to her me being away for prolonged periods of time was not a problem as long as I got back at night. Weekends were great because I would tell her I was with friends, when in fact I used to spend all hours at the weekend having sex with my older lover.
    He was a really nice guy and he was so gentle the “first time” with me. He took a lot of trouble making sure I was well lubricated and when he first penetrated me it was the most gratifying feeling. I couldnt believe how easy it was because he was a BIG guy and being a rigby player he was so muscular and everything was huge. I was like a little doll in his hands. I dont know how girls say that the first time hurts. I find that strange. Perhaps they are not well lubricated and most likely their guy are inexperienced too. My first experience is what all girls should in fact experience. I think because he was older and a lot more experienced he was really very very good at it. That weekend when I lost my virginity, I spent the whole night just with him having sex repeatedly. He just kept going like a machine. I would fall asleep and I would be woken up having a huge orgasm with him inside me pounding away. I dont think he slept at all that weekend. I had to go back to school on monday and I was totally exhausted. I was so tired but I wanted it again that evening after school. I couldnt help thinking about it and wanted to pretend I was unwell so I could go back to him again.

    • avatarJosceliaP12 says:

      Dang that’s really deep.

      • avatarlizgrl says:

        LOL, couldn’t have been that DEEP. She said he was BIG..LOL
        She was 13 and from what she says she had a friggin good time. Lucky her!! I bet he was very happily and extremely pleasantly exhausted. I am sure he was like a machine working overtime. I am so happy for her.
        My first time was so crappy. He ejaculated even before he entered me. So there was no first time with him. We split up soon after. Thank god. I hooked up with up with this guy who worked in the sports shop at the mall. He was so cute. It didnt take very long for him to take my virginity. The sex was sensational. It was like having unlimited entry to orgasm heaven. LOL

  5. avatarRachel says:

    Does it hurt to get a penis inserted into your vagina? Do you bleed? I want a penis in mines. I want him to feel my pubes. After I want him to stick a hand I. There and feel. Oh yeah

  6. avatarJordyn says:

    I kinda lost my virginity when i was 13. I had cheer tryouts and we were doing toe touches and splits. I was doing a split then i freaked out bc it hurt so much. But the weird thing is i was able to do them. I started bleeding and i thought i had my period but it was a week early. I told my mom and she took me to the doctor they asked me if i had intercourse i lied and said nope. They said i lost my virginity and i said ok. So actually what happened was the guys penis was… Yeah and it didnt break all the way. This was the first time i said this. Haha story of my life

    • avatarnikki says:

      So I am 14 definetly a virgin. So far I have done oral sex on this guy who I have no romantic interests. In but I just have. Such a hard time controlling my self around him. And he is such a player I guess you could wayne only hooks up with me because I’m easy and have big hips. He has been a lot of my friends first kisses and even first times having sex he is 16. I don’t know why he pursues younger girls maybe because they are so Mich easier than people his own age. The point is I want to do things with him so badly but I am preventing things from going further becayluse I know is is bad for me and will hurt me ( not mtly vagindla but me) but seriousltu when I’m with him I want him to tear off my cloths but ugh… so many. Implication. Tell me what you think on the whole situation

  7. avatarshailene says:

    I lost my virginity when I was 13 and I regret it every single day. I’m obviously not with that guy anymore and it didn’t even feel like anything. I did it because I was pressured by my friend and let me tell you, it was awful. It felt so wrong afterwards and the guy went around telling the which whole school. Everyone knew I was the 7th grader who had lost her virginity. Wait until you know you’re ready.

    • avatarnessie says:

      I lost my virginity too at 13 and under similar circumstances. My friends took me to this guys place. They knew him. He was a lot older too but he was so cool. It was my first time meeting him and that was my first time I was ever introduced to sex. My friend encouraged me and pushed me to do it. yes it seemed like being pressured but it was more to do with the anxiety, nervousness, being unsure and emabarrassed being naked with a guy youve just met a second ago. Whe he started doing oral on me I almost died but it felt good. My friends kept popping into the room while he was doing stuff and I was mortified. But he kept maing me orgasm over and over again and again and things just happened. Being my first I kept seeing him for many months after that. I wanted t have sex with him all the time.
      Remember the first times are always confusing. This doesnt mean the experience was bad or that what you did was wrong. Unfortunately we are fed to believe that such things are bad. I am not sure why? To me this was a fantastic experience even though at first I felt pressured into having sex.
      I think the difference in my case was that he was a lot older and really nice to me. I hve never liked guys my age. They are pathetic and so immature. Clearly what your guy did was bad. You never kiss and tell. That is so bad that he spread it around the school.

  8. avatarhedleyr says:

    There are 2 reasons I have waited to have sex
    1. The main problem people worry about is pregnancy but what they don’t realize is that almost EVERY time you have sex, protected, or not, you will most likely get some kind of disease and never get symptoms. Unless you get tested YOU WILL NEVER KNOW… until five years later you realize you can’t have kids.
    2. You will always compare the sex you have with the man you TRULY love who may not be that good at it, to an ex from years ago. That will make the experience less special.

    • avatarRM says:

      Are you really such an idiot. Look at your first comment. I bet your virginity is a matter of circumstance. No guy would want someone so dumb. Sorry but such comments are idiotic.
      Your experience with the one you love will always be special no matter if youve already had sex or not.
      Virginity is an ignorant artificial value placed on an unmarried girl. This is a price decided by the males in society. So go ahead be slaves to those males who have decided your value even without your involvement. Lovely advice.
      Being a virgin should be YOUR choice not because your lover will value you more. By doing that ( ie being pure to enhance your value, that has been decided by males ) you become his slave and you have succumbed to that subliminal pressure.

    • avatarBee says:

      Hey, I’d like to say that I think it’s great that you’re waiting because you don’t want to have sex, but what all of you’ve said is totally incorrect.
      Most people do not get STDs if they use proper protection. I’m sexually active and I don’t have and have never had an STD, because I practice monogamy and use protection (and I don’t sleep with people who don’t do the same things or people who I don’t trust to be faithful).
      Second of all, as somebody who hasn’t had sex before and is somewhat misinformed (check your information sources), you seem to have a lot of misconceptions about sex. In the past I had sex with another partner. I have never found myself comparing sex with my current partner to previous sex. First of all, in a loving communicative relationship, you will generally have decent to FANTASTIC sex because you care about each other and try to please each other. If you’re not having good sex, it’s probably something to look into (talk about it, try new things and never settle). The most special sex I’ve ever had is with my fiance because the depth of care we have for each other makes it special. I haven’t found it to be marred by my prior experiences. Again, this is something you wouldn’t know about as a virgin.
      Furthermore, sex gets better over time with practice – I’m not saying hook up randomly to practice. I’m just saying that it’s VERY unlikely that you’re going to lose your virginity to some guy at whatever age (I was 17) and say “Damn! This is the best sex I have had and ever will have.” I have never heard anyone express this. Losing your virginity is usually painful and awkward. It can be a nice experience if you’re in love, but yeah…still not mind blowing or even good sex. So chances are your relationships and sex will only get progressively better. People generally learn from their mistakes and progress to better things.
      Lastly, sex, as long as it’s consensual and with someone who you trust and who treats you well can be pretty great. It’s like a much better version of chocolate cake; if you’re eating some delicious chocolate cake and you can’t stop thinking “wow, this cake is good but it can never live up to that chocolate cake I had three years ago at that restaurant” that’s more a problem with your attitude.

  9. avatarsharlina says:

    that’s good advice I love keeping my virginity because it worth a lot that’s what I think im a very strong girl for some to break my virgin

  10. avatarMary says:

    I want to lose my virginity. I’m completely in love with my boyfriend of almost 2 years and feel like he really could be the one. He is my boyfriend, and my best friend. He is, however, a freshman in college this year while I’m a Junior in High School. I’m old for my grade and he’s young so there is only a little more than a year between us in age. I’m currently 17 and we are seriously talking about sex. He and I both want to do it. The only problem is both of us think I should be on birth control before, and I don’t want to go behind my mom’s back to go on birth control. I was wondering if there is any advice on how to bring this up with my mom? I know she’ll help me, but she might be disappointed because she waited until marriage (she was 29 years old) and always complimented me on waiting when we talked about it briefly in the past. But, now I don’t want to wait anymore and I’m scared to talk to her about it. Any advice on how to make the conversation (and sex the first time) easier?

    • avatarBee says:

      Hi! Great question. I would say that if you’re not comfortable going behind her back and you’re not comfortable going to her, you might want to wait on sex. If you really feel you are ready though, you don’t have anything to be ashamed about and you shouldn’t let anyone shame you, even your mom.
      Now, you can always get birth control yourself with a doctor’s prescription, and these prescriptions can be given out for lots of reasons (cramps, irregular periods, pms) so you can get on birth control without expressly telling your mother why. She may not even want to know if you do become sexually involved. If you have a very close relationship with your mother though, think she’d want to know/talk to you about this and you want to tell her, I would approach it delicately but directly.
      I’d say to tell her that you’d like to get on birth control because you’re happy in your relationship, emotionally ready and mature enough to become sexually active, and that you want to be honest with her about your decision and that you hope you have her respect regarding the issue. Say that you know you’re ready and that you want to be careful.
      As for the sex, I know it’s kinda awkward (losing your virginity is kinda awkward) but all I can say is LUBE. Seriously. The less friction the better and a regular drug store lubricant (not the warming or tingling ones; those increase sensations and your chance of infections) like KY jelly or the generic brand will make things go a lot smoother. Otherwise, I’d just say, relax beforehand. You just want to be comfortable and relaxed (not rushed) and feel good about yourself. You’ll be more likely to relax and enjoy it more. If you don’t enjoy it the first time for physical discomfort reasons, don’t worry. With time it will get easier and easier and less painful. Some people don’t even experience pain their first time, but most people experience moderate discomfort. It really hurt my first few times, but you just have to communicate with your partner so that they go at a comfortable pace. Starting to use lube made things a lot better; even though you feel naturally lubricated, you’ll really want the extra stuff. It makes a world of difference if you put lubricant on him. That’s about all the advice I can give. Good luck to you!

  11. avatarKrissy says:

    I always dream about losing my virginty. Most of my friends lost theres. So when they talk about sex i feel left out. Is it normal to feel like this?

  12. avataraddrienne says:

    I lost my virginity when I was 15 which was last year and I regret it cuz, I wasn’t ready I dint feel bad at first but, I thought about it and wished I waited

  13. avatarLili says:

    As you can guess I’m planning to lose my virginity.. I know that might sound geeky but I think it the best way. The guy has experience but is also someone I live and trust, we’ve been talking about it for a while and it’s never been a problem not being sexually active, a conversation earlier tonight (8th January 2014) and I told him I think I’m ready, he completely understood and said he’ll stand by what ever desicion I make, we’ve planned for me to go to his house in a couple weeks time and try things out, he said if i feel uncomfortable or change my mind at any time tell him and he’ll stop, I completely trust him and know he will. However what I need to know is how do I prepare? What should I do In these weeks leading up to it,what questions should I ask him, what do we need to talk about, what should I wear on the day, I need as much help advice and thoughts from people with and without experience! Thankyou girls<3

  14. avatarblondie_15 says:

    I just recently lost my virginity to my boyfriend, is it normal when im thinking about it if i feel like i didnt? Or if i cant imagine it ? He feels the same way, we know we did it but why cant we remember ? The first night i felt weird in my vaginal area but today i dont feel any different than i did when i was still a virgin, almost like i havent lost it at all. Is that normal ? Can anyone help ?

  15. avatarMaria says:

    I’ve met this awesomely wonderful guy. He is only here for vacation and he is the cousin of my guy friend. I really love his prospect in life and family but WE ARE TOO YOUNG FOR THAT. Im 19 he is 20. And, we tried to do it but i stopped. I wasnt really ready yet. Then now, we are thinking of etting a room in a resort and chill. Im confused if i would give my cherry to him or not. Can anyone help me? Yes, I trust him, but we arent really couples. Just a fling type maybe just for the reason we cant be together cause he will be going back.

  16. avatarmegan3955 says:

    i have never had sex but don’t rush into it because bad things can happen and u would have to pay the end result

  17. avatarJosh says:

    I’am 33 yr old woman n still a virgin…yeah theres lots of pressure out there but I believe in sex after marriage….theres lots of guys who can do it anytime n anywhere but according to my religion its important to stay pure n wait 4 ur husband….its a sinful act 2 have sex before marriage….iam single, independent, highly educated n average luking but I still belief in fairy tale love n do belief that theres someone out there whose my soulmate…..if i do meet one il marry n give myself completely n if i don’t meet any1 I still wouldn’t have regrets…Life is beautiful anyways!!!

  18. avatarCloe says:

    I want to lose my virginity but I’m scared. I am single but I know how to get a guy. Anyway I am not sure what to do. Guys try to pressure me but I am simply scared. I don’t know what to do

  19. avatarLosbeth says:

    I feel ready put and my boyfriend keep asking me to do it with him I want to put my friends keep saing nooo I don’t know what to do

    • avatarKiersten says:

      If you feel ready then you should do what you want! If you are because for bf is tell you that you should then don’t, if your friends are telling you not to or to do it then they arnt good friends for trying to control your sexuality. Bottom line is don’t listen to anyone but yourself because only you will know when you are ready. :)

  20. avatarALICE says:

    I disagree with theresa’she don’t have to say that

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