From The Message Boards: I’m 19 And I’ve Never Been Kissed!

I’m always intrigued when I see questions about age and what’s acceptable or not for certain ages. Sometimes society suddenly determines what’s okay and what’s not. This week y’all are talking about how old is too old for a first kiss, and I love that this topic came up!

Let’s see what y’all had to say:

MatildaLove said:

I still haven’t experienced my first kiss and I have recently turned 20.

The first guy to like me, as in really like me, not just a guy who wanted a girlfriend and would chat all kinds of girls up, I met in November when I was still 19. I went on my first date in December, haven’t been on any since but one of my guy friends and I are working on setting up a double date.

I wouldn’t really sweat it, what most of those other people were experiencing wasn’t love. At times I have felt a bit insecure about it, but then I think forward and am much happier that I wasn’t going around kissing a bunch of wrong guys.

OwlCityFreak said:

I’m 19 as well, I’ll be 20 in July, and I’m right there with you! I’ve never had a boyfriend, and I’m a virgin. I’ve been made out with twice, but I don’t really count those as ‘real’ kisses.

I had the opportunity to get together with a guy, and after thinking about it, I decided I wasn’t ready. I’ve learned that I need to love myself before I love someone else wholeheartedly, and I’m insecure about my body.

My point is, everyone has a different time when they are ready to pursue relationships. If you’re not ready, then that’s fine! Don’t let anyone tell you you’re too old. If you’re young at heart it doesn’t matter what age you are.

skaitlin said:

You are normal! I don’t want to just repeat everything everyone else has said, but I want to stress that being almost 20 and never kissed is NOT a bad thing. It is a blessing that so many people don’t realize. I know that the culture these days says that if you are in high school and never kissed then there is something wrong with you, but that is such a lie!

I encourage you to focus on your life right now, whatever things you are passionate about, dive into those things. And before you know it, there will be a guy who notices you and loves your passion for life! Trust me, don’t waste time looking for the right guy, he will come along. Be patient and don’t stress.

I totally agree! Some people have their first kiss at a very young age and some don’t. Everybody is different!

Not having your first kiss in high school doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. You just haven’t found anyone that you want to have a first kiss with. If you haven’t felt attraction toward anyone enough to kiss them, that’s totally fine.

Don’t dwell on the fact that you haven’t kissed someone yet! Keep being you and doing the things you love. It will happen when it’s right for you!

Have you had your first kiss? How old were you if you did? Are you waiting to kiss someone? Tell me in the comments!

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  • Cecilia

    I’m almost 20 and I have never kissed anyone, but it’s not because I’m not ready or don’t want to. It’s because I’m pretty fat and not very attractive. I have lots of friends and I’m a really fun person to be around, but seriously there has never been a single guy who has been into me in that sense. I have so many friends whom I love to death and vice versa, but no one has ever liked me, and all the guys I’ve liked have liked skinnier, hotter girls. 🙁

    • NS

      Don’t be discouraged! I’m turning 20 in about two weeks and just recently had my first kiss. I was getting really upset about turning 20 without being kissed and legit would lay awake at night crying about it because I felt so horrible about myself. I’ve always been super self-conscious about my weight and because of that, I always felt utterly unattractive. All my close friends that I talked to about this told me that I have to stop focusing on it and learn to love myself, but to be honest, I’m not even close to that. I met a guy a couple months ago who shockingly likes me for who I am and makes me feel all-around more confident and comfortable with myself. I’m really glad that he was the person I was able to share my first kiss with because even though it was something that I’d been very conscious of, while it was actually happening, that didn’t for a second cross my mind. Believe me, if it can happen to someone with as many issues as I have, it can happen for just about anyone.

  • Lauren

    I’m 17, almost 18 and I just had my first kiss with my first boyfriend. It was his first kiss as well so we were able to share something that was meaningful to both of us. Don’t worry about not kissing anyone yet! Everyone is different and has a different time when they feel comfortable with sharing that experience with another person. Just relax and let it happen

  • JustDMarie

    My “first kiss” was when my “boyfriend” pushed me up against the wall during lunch at school and kissed me on the lips 2 minutes after he asked me out…… I don’t count it as my first for the reason of that being incredibly stupid.

  • Cyga

    Don’t stress! I’m 19 and just had my first kiss a few days ago. At first I didn’t know what to do, but once I stopped thinking about it it was great. Just let it happen–hopefully with someone you really care about.

  • twilightluvrxox

    I’ve never kissed anyone and I’m 16. I’ve just been rejected a lot and I’m not sure why, I am naturally nice and a lot of people think I’m pretty (not meant to come across as bragging). Just whenever I like a guy and tell them they turn me down -.-

  • maya

    I felt really insecure about my kisslessness for a while! Until I moved from a convent to a city school in Ireland, where one of the girls asked me if I had ever had a boyfriend. When I said no, she gasped and asked if I had ever been kissed. I said no and she whispered to me not to tell anyone, because they’ll ‘think I’m a lezbo’. I realised then that I didn’t need to kiss someone to be the confident person I am today, it needs to come from myself. Still, kissing looks fun.

  • Shelby

    I am 16 and I have never been with anyone or had anything! I don’t need those things to feel better about myself!

  • Delia

    I’ve never kissed anyone, but that’s a choice. I am saving my first kiss for my wedding day. It’s not that I think kissing before marriage is wrong, it’s just that I’m the type of girl who regrets things very easily and I know I would regret it if my first kiss wasn’t with my husband. I want it to be with someone who loves every part of me, who I know I can trust and who will protect and honor me. That’s why you should be happy you haven’t had your first kiss yet; you have the chance to make it special and meaningful.

    • zingo

      Aren’t you afraid of looking like an idiot in front of everyone at your wedding ?