Brogurt: it’s a thing. Because regular old “feminine” Greek yogurt just doesn’t cut it for men (duh, where have you been?), someone has created Powerful Yogurt – the yogurt made for men, by men.
You didn’t know the world needed it, but now… I mean, it’s obvious. Guys can’t just walk around eating Greek yogurt like Fage or Chobani. Come on! How would you feel if your boyfriend started stocking his fridge with that girly stuff? You’d probably be like, “Ew, what are you doing? Everyone knows Chobani is for girls.” It’s basically like, if you don’t get your period on a monthly basis, you’re not allowed to eat delicious peach flavored Fage. Sorry, dudes.
But no, it’s fine, because Powerful Yogurt is here. And girls, don’t even think about taking a bite of your man’s Powerful Yogurt. Don’t even… that’s what the other brands are for, okay? Who do you think you are?
Powerful Yogurt’s mission? To give men abs of steel worthy of a Greek god. As they explain, “In a niche typically dominated by female consumers, we decided to develop a new Greek yogurt specifically suited to address the unique health and nutrition needs of the most neglected consumers in the category: men.” Also, it’s “man-sized.” Because why would guys want to buy those pitiful little female-sized yogurts that are being sold right now? If they do, a vagina might start growing out of their armpit or something. Seriously, it’s happened (it hasn’t).
Now, ladies, I know the flavors sound delicious (apple-cinnamon yogurt? GIMME!), but remember what I said: you can’t eat this! You can’t handle this man-sized Powerful Yogurt, so please stop fooling yourselves.
Serious break for a sec: I totally get that it seems like most yogurt advertisements are made with women in mind, but… isn’t this taking it a little too far? I mean, when are we going to stop with the men and women products? First pens and now yogurt?! World, stop! Just stop.
Do you think this Powerful Yogurt is ridiculous? Would you be turned off by a guy eating regular Greek yogurt? How do you feel about these types of products? Tell me in the comments.