What Does Sexuality Have To Do With Being A Good Friend?

Some psychologists got together and decided that gay men and straight women make great friends because “they aren’t in the running for the same suitors.”

Well, OBVIOUSLY. Basically, this study says that women don’t trust their girlfriends when it comes to advice because we’re all competing for male attention. And “the relationship was similarly advantageous to gay men, suggesting they too distrust their friends who are gay men – whom they see as competition for suitors.”

I’ve had a few gay “boyfriends” that I was super close with, and I’ll admit some gave me very honest advice when it came to guys. But I don’t think they gave better advice because they’re not competing with me.

I don’t like this idea that women are skewing advice because we’re secretly vying for male attention. And if this study applies for gay males and straight females, then shouldn’t it apply for lesbians and straight females and gays and straight males?

I don’t think your sexual orientation has anything to do with how good of a friend you are. That’s just ridiculous. If it were true, then girls would rarely be friends with other girls, and guys wouldn’t be friends with other guys. I’ve also had some pretty bad gay friends so what does this study have to say about that?

Bottom line, good friends are good friends. Sexuality doesn’t really have anything to do with it.

What do you think? Are gay guys better friends because they’re not competing with you? Does sexuality determine a good friend? Tell me in the comments!

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Posted in: Friends & Family
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  • FairyGayBoy

    The reason that girls wanted to be friends with me is because since I was girly and loved boys, its like having a girl friend without the drama that girls have. My friends and I basically lived at F21 and VS and we would talk about guys all the time, but we werent competing for the same guys. I wanted the gay ones and they wanted the straight ones.

  • Caitlin

    I don’t understand how that makes sense though…Gay men and straight women technically are in the running for the same people; they’re both attracted to men…what’s to say a woman and a gay man can’t like the same guy?

  • Raven

    I think a lot of girls like having gay best friends because there’s no chance for it to get weird ie, the guy crushing on you (I think Gurl posted something about this not too long ago?). They say that in a friendship between two people of the opposite sex, one person will inevitably start to feel more for the other person and want to take it to the next level, even if the other person doesn’t feel the same way. Being friends with a gay guy solves this problem (unles you fall for him, that is!)