Boards
Over the weekend, Harry Styles was asked about his split with Taylor Swift on a radio show. Harry handled the situation really well, and it got me thinking about how to deal with those awkward post-breakup questions that get asked.
It’s not just celebrities who deal with things like this! Breaking up is tough, but sometimes it is that awkward period where people are learning about the breakup that makes it a zillion times worse. Having people ask “So, why did you break up?” or other intrusive personal questions can be super annoying.
Sometimes the askers are well-meaning and sometimes they are just gossip mongering, but the reality is that it is bound to happen to you. What should you do if someone asks what you feel could be a rude question about your ex-relationship? Here are a few things to keep in mind to own those prying questions and stay on a path that makes you comfortable and able to move on.
Be Calm
Harry could have gotten super angry about that DJ asking about his relationship(I mean, it is his personal business, after all), but he didn't. Whether or not you're going to answer, if you deal with the initial question calmly, people will likely lose interest pretty fast, and allow you to deal with the situation privately. After you get one of these pesky questions, maybe just take a deep breath before saying anything to make sure you won't snap. Source: Will Alexander/WENN.comAccept That It Is Going To Happen
Regardless of whether or not you want them to, people will ask you about your breakup. I know, it's frustrating, but if you are at least expecting it, you can think ahead about how to handle it. Though people should respect your space, it's likely some will try to invade it, so just mentally prep for that before you start going nuts. Source: Shutterstock.comStay Busy
First off, if you're busy, you may be able to avoid these questions from the get go since people may be less likely to pry if you're clearly invested in something else. Second, it also gives you an easy out. If someone asks you about your breakup, just say you're too busy to talk about it at the moment. What? It's true! Source: Shutterstock.comWho Is Asking? Part 1
Okay, if it's your mom or your BFF asking, before you dismiss it as rude, try to see where they are coming from. They are probably asking because they just want to know if you are doing okay, not because they want all the dirty details of your life. Completely shutting down on them may hurt their feelings, so simply appreciate their concern and say you need a little space before you can talk. Or, if you're up for it, try opening up to them. Sometimes talking about this stuff with people you're close to can make you feel better. Source: Shutterstock.comWho Is Asking? Part 2
If it's that girl who sits next to you in French who you've never spoken to until this moment, you don't need to give her the "I appreciate that you care" line. Be polite, but straightforward, and say you'd prefer not to talk about it. It's not rude to gently remind them that it's your personal business and not their right to know. Source: Shutterstock.comDon't Spill Every Detail
Even if you feel comfortable talking about your breakup when someone asks, in general, don't start going into a whole list of everything that went wrong leading to your split. If anything, this will just fuel their curiosity even further or get people talking about how you seem still hung up on it. Take a cue from Harry and instead give mature well wishes and respect to your ex. If you truly can't, it's probs better to say nothing at all. Source: Shutterstock.comDon't Start A Rumor
If everyone is asking you, it can get frustrating and lead you make a sarcastic or off-hand remark. These types of responses are the things that will start spinning out of control and make it worse for you, your ex and maybe others. It may be tempting to play with all these people begging you for the details, but making up something so they leave you alone isn't going to help you in the long run. Source: Shutterstock.comBut Do Talk It Out If You Want
In the end, it's totally your decision if you want to talk about your breakup. The thing is that you might actually feel better if you do kind of talk about all those feelings and get a little help sorting them out. But it should be YOU who initiates the conversation so that you can set the terms without other people thinking they have a right to know. Source: Shutterstock.comRemember This Feeling
Next time your friend goes through a breakup, make sure your own experience has provided a lesson about how to help a friend during this time. You didn't want people prying, so even if you're curious, keep the focus on just being supportive rather than the failed relationship. If everyone can start adopting that sort of approach, maybe then the dreaded question "So, why did you breakup?!?" will disappear forever. Source: Shutterstock.comWhat is the rudest thing that someone has ever asked about your relationship? How did you handle it? Tell us in the comments!
Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter
Would You Rather
Would You Rather?
Yay for Harry for dealing with it so smoothly! That has got to be difficult… This is a great article, by the way. I’ve never really had to go through a breakup but this totally makes sense.