From The Message Boards: Does Being Feminine Make You Stupid Or Weak?

I love it when y’all discuss things that are happening in society! I know there’s been a lot of talk about the gender war and gender gap, but I was really intrigued to see the topic of femininity pop up.

This idea that being feminine makes you lesser really interested me. Let’s see what y’all had to say!

Laurenthenerd5 said:

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about femininity. How girls who like pink and wearing dresses and baking are considered “weak” or “stupid”. How feminine feminists are criticized because apparently genuinely enjoying sparkly things is degrading. How boys who like clothes are bullied because being like a girl is somehow an insult.

I think it really boils down to the sexist idea that anything relating to women is bad or weak or stupid. Out culture has just built all of these ideas of what femininity means: dresses, pink, sparkles, fashion, makeup, baking, sewing. But those things aren’t “stupid” things.

Nyctimene said:

It bothers me because on the flip-side, anyone who doesn’t like dresses, pink, who doesn’t wear heels, etc is considered “butch,” “tomboyish,” ungirly, unfeminine.

As long as you’re female, you’re feminine. People need to stop stressing heels and skirts and looking like a Barbie doll as the ONLY ticket to being considered “feminine.”

hotjamale said:

I don’t think it’s the dresses or the baking that make people think girls are stupid, I think it’s that so many girls who try to be this textbook description of “feminine” act ditsy and make themselves look highly unintelligent. Obviously not all of them, but a lot of girls who dress in sparkles and pink and wear dresses act stupid, and WANT to be thought of as weak.

As someone who grew up around mostly boys, I found myself trying to portray a more girly image because I didn’t want other kids to call me a boy.

Today, I think I’m pretty feminine. I love sparkly things, pink and makeup. But I’m also a feminist who’s independent, strong and intelligent. Just because I love fashion and pretty things doesn’t mean I’m stupid or weak.

Femininity does apply to women because we are females, but men can be feminine as well. Just as women can be masculine. If you like baking and pink and puppies, you can still be smart and strong. It doesn’t make you any less of a person to like what you like. Your personal preferences quite frankly are nobody’s business.

What do you think about femininity? Does being feminine make you stupid? Tell me in the comments!

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  • Kim

    As someone who kinda obsessed with the color pink and is really academic ( I plan on getting a PhD one day), I don’t understand why wearing a certain color is considered stupid. People who say that pink is girly and stupid, are pretty much saying that being a girl is stupid. The way our (American) society portrays the stuck up mean girl, who wears pink, is just a stereotype. A person’s intelligence has no bases on their personal likes and dislikes.

    Does wearing all black and wearing glasses make a woman smarter? I don’t think so.

  • Josephine Shaffer

    Love my feminine side ilike dresses which are Pink, Red i am a virgin.

  • LittleLamb

    This is a topic that always makes me very sad, but must be discussed.

    It breaks my heart to see qualities I respect, like gentleness and aestheticism, being treated as laughable, pathetic traits. It puts us gals into a corner to get laughed at. Sometimes it seems like… when boys aren’t drooling over our bodies, they’re making fun of us and the things we like. And boys have nearly all the power in the world. It’s like they can say what’s good and what’s bad, and make it the law. (But not all boys are like that of course. I just feel so small and powerless, some days.)

    I’m not a ditzy valley girl though. I’m a more sophisticated lady…

    As for pink itself, I love it very much, but usually only as an accent. Turquoise, periwinkle, mauve, these shades are much prettier and more unique.

  • Lolly

    I wore a pink dress this morning and couldn’t remember my address or basic addition. I can only type this comment now because I changed into a sober navy pants suit.

    • Laurenthenerd5

      I’m not sure whether you agree with me and do understand it or if you agree with me but couldn’t see what I was trying to say.
      The title of this article about what I wrote does make it seem like I’m trying to promote femphobia, but I’m not. I just wanted to start having a discussion about it, so people would think about femininity shaming. I belive that your gender, sex, and gender expression, have nothing to do with your intelligence or worth.
      Just to clear that up.

      • Caitlin Corsetti

        Lauren I don’t think you were trying to promote femphobia at all! You started a great discussion. I think it’s really important to recognize that being “feminine” as far as stereotypes are concerned in reality doesn’t reflect how smart or strong or successful someone is.

    • whoa

      I know right! After removing the pink laptop sleeve my laptop is working sooo much better! Maybe a bit of manly camouflage would help!

  • Lullaby

    I think pink is cute, but doesn’t make us weak, too much pink might though

  • Laurenthenerd5

    Ahhhhhhhhhh someone made a blog-y-thing about something I wrote. Okay. This is weird. Thanks?

    • Caitlin Corsetti

      Thank YOU for sparking such a great discussion!