7 Ways To Deal With Your Boyfriend’s Family

When I was a kid, I was constantly hearing from my parents and every other adult about how annoying in-laws were. I always thought, what could be so bad about your significant other’s family? I wondered, could they really be that annoying? I was very skeptical of this, for some reason. I couldn’t wait to meet a guy and get a second family of my own. It sounded great!

These naive feelings lasted until I started dating a guy who had one of the most annoying families ever. Suddenly, I understood why everyone complained about their in-laws. It’s one thing to be stuck with your own sometimes annoying family, but it’s an entirely different thing to be stuck with a family that you don’t even have to be stuck to. At least your family is flesh and blood! 

Okay, so not every other family is annoying. I’m sure there are plenty of in-laws or soon-to-be in-laws out there who are perfectly lovely. But if you’re dating someone who happens to have the kind of family members that make you bite your tongue, there is help. Here are some tips on how to deal with your boyfriend’s family, from the pain in the butt little brother to the over-protective mom:

In the end, keep this in mind: you really can’t change your boyfriend’s family. They are who they are! The best thing you can do is learn how to deal with them and accept that they might sometimes annoy you. Remember: you’re dating your boyfriend, not his family. If he’s worth it, then that’s all that matters.

Have you ever had to deal with a boyfriend’s annoying family? How did you do it? What kind of family members did I miss? Tell me in the comments.

 

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35 Comments

  1. avatar Hope says:

    The creepy over affectionate second cousin that has a crush on your boyfriend. The rude immature younger sister that is an adult but laughes behind your back and spews hatred at your children.

  2. avatar Mbali says:

    My boyfriend’s brother hates me. My boyfriend says its because he thinks that i’m speading rumours that me & my boyfriend are dating.

  3. avatar panda_luvr says:

    My boyfriend’s parents are total monsters! From day one to this day, they hate me for no reason. One time his parents even called the police on me and tried to have me put away in a mental institution. His dad’s reason was, “I’m only trying to protect my son.” Oh please, you don’t even know me! I have tried EVERYTHING, but to no avail. No matter what I do, nothing pleases them. I am at my wits’ end – I don’t know how long I can take anymore of his parents’ hypocrisy. Me and my man are super stressed, that we don’t know what to do anymore.

    I’m 20 and he is 24, we live with his parents in a one bedroom studio apartment. Once we get settled, we are planning to move out. But unfortunately, his mom refuses to give him back his social security money because she is super controlling and want to take control of his life. She doesn’t care whether he is happy or not. She FLIPPED OUT when she found out that me and my man have plans to get married! She told my man as long as I am in his life, she will NEVER give back his money.

    Please help, what should I do? I love my man with all my heart and I know that he loves me too. He has always taken my side against his parents and promised me that no matter what, we will always be together forever. Since day one he has protected me from his parents and family. They all know that I am the most important woman in his life. He loves me so much, that he has even changed his life style and gave up alcohol (the reason why his mother is his payee and manages his money), he doesn’t drink anymore and has started going back to church with me. I couldn’t be anymore proud of him. I love him with all my heart and soul, and I never want to lose him.

    Please help, any well meaning advice would be of much help and appreciated. And for all of you who dare to judge me and my man, this is OUR life. Not YOURS, so if you have anything negative to say keep it to yourself.

    • avatar longlick says:

      Get a job each to get some money and move out tell em to get fucked nothing guna tear you apart if your strong

  4. avatar Denise says:

    Well.. it’s says in here, concerning each family member, to talk to your bf if you have tried, but can’t seem to find a happy medium. What if your bf is the root of the problem. He goes to his mom for advice on our relationship. He talks about my flaws with his mother all the time, yet he denies it. The reason I know that he does tho, is because during a conversation that I had with his mother, she was upset and admitted to my bf telling her things. It hurt me badly! My bf’s mother is a gossip with the entire family, which is the reason I feel shut out by many of them. My bf and I have lived together for 3 years, and we have a baby together. So to leave is not that simple! My biggest complaint … I really wish he would keep our life private. He does not need to tell his mom about our sex life, our relationship, my insecurities, my flaws, my everything. He should be my best friend not hers!!

  5. avatar Vanessa says:

    Me and my boyfriend bin living together for 5 months. Under the same roof are his parent’s and grandma. His mom and grandma are Makeing me look like i dont do anything and in reality i do i used to wake up at 5am make him his lunch and start cleaning. His mom wakes up at 6am gets his lil brother ready for school she drops him off at 7:15 and idk where else she goes but she doesn’t come home till 12. The grandma dosent wake up till 9:30 – 10. By that time i was done with everything, so i would go to sleep for an Hour or two because i go to school at night.. His mom gets home and im awake laying on my bed doing my HW and then that tell my father in law that i didn’t do anything, he tells my boyfriend and the last time that we talked about this he sied if i didn’t put my part he was going to leave me..
    Please i need advice i don’t want to lose him

    • avatar Mary says:

      Honestly if your boyfriend is putting his family 1st than you then obviously there is a problem and you do not want to be with a mammas boy. In the other hand if your relationship is serious then you should consider if its worth it and your boyfriend should put you as his main priority not his family

    • avatar nessa says:

      You should video tape itself doing chores. Stand your ground girl

  6. avatar Tiff says:

    Well me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 years now. His family is very annoying from his mother calling everyday him having to explain everything that goes on in our life to her all the time. She’s so judge mental of everything. His family away want something from him . They call almost every weekend wanting you to drop everything your doing to come help them. I’m just tired of the bull I wish he would say no to them. And I’m tried of hearing his mom dog him out like he’s not a good person or father. But he’s good when he’s cashing out for them. I need help because I don’t wanna say something fucked up to them people. But I am not with that this how the family is. Why can’t I be me and say how I feel. I told him lots of time how I feel but nothing has changed. So I just avoid them till I feel better about them.

  7. avatar Jessica says:

    Okay well first off they speak a totally different language and they know English but they still choose to speak the language that I don’t even understand I just feel like he needs to realize that he’s in a 3 year relationship and that it’s me and him now not him and his parents he has a new life and a totally different agenda but he’s one of those guys that you have to cut off everything as in stop having sex change your passwords so he can be curious about what’s going on in my life instead of being at home waiting on him go with your friends constantly just for him to want to spend time with you I just want him to spend time with me every day not nobody else

  8. avatar Anonymous says:

    u knw wat gal wena all u have 2 do is to tll ur bf dat u dnt like dis n dat myb he will undrstnd nd tll him dat u no longer wanna live wth his sister’s

  9. avatar Lea says:

    my boyfriend family theyve been pretend to love me ,now that i dont give tehm money or buy whtever they need they wnt to fight me ,they say i bigger than their Son ,yes that one i know but for 5year they didnt see that and now they are angry saying I think im a celebrity because im driving and having a btter job ,

  10. avatar Quizzy says:

    My Boyfriend and I been together 2 years now . It was sort of “love at first sight”. I was in school when I met him. I went to a school out of my county so I was basically here and there to get to school.My mom and I were having issues so I decided to stay with him and sister for school . Its his sister house . Being here I haved experienced a lot . It get annoying sometimes dealing with them. So they have this thing where theytalk abour their fights. He have two sisters I meam they are good people but living with them can be difficult for me . We really dnt hve privacy like I want us to have , His sisters can get annoying when they fuss , his nieces and nephews can be grown as fuck. He have this one sister who always stare at me when I’M dress up . That makes me uncomfortable . She just stares all the time . Well both of them . I mostly be in the room so when I’M walk out its like thet just stare . Both of them are noisy. They can be very fake at times . They will text each other oreither talk about me . The kids listen so they repeat things they say . Which is wack . Their 34 and 31 and have kids . Once I got in an agurment with his sister because she claim I got smart with her . I can just go on and on about this . Its like at times he can get rude in front of them . Then they always claim they can fight so good and their so tough . And he sometimes threaten me to go get them to fight me . He sometimes get loud just so they can hear them. Its no “strings attach ” so I already know their on his team . It was one time we were tussling at a party and his sisters and this girl they call sister broke it up. And they were saying shit like “if she wanna go let her go” “more females in the world ” ” you better get in the car before I get mad ” like shut the hell up . One of his sisters even told him “he better hope I’m worth it ” … Now he works nights so he sleeps all day. But I understand he tired but I have “My Needs” .I’m just so fed up . He tells them everything where he going , make , etc . Im just tired of feeling like I’m dating them all . Please give advice !

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