Since it’s Valentine’s Day today, I’m sure you guys have seen a lot of singles vs. couples wars going on. You know what I mean, right? On the one hand, you’ve got those people who are making statuses on Facebook about how being single is so much better than being in a relationship. On the other hand, you’ve got those friends who are gushing about how happy they are that they’ve found love and how they can’t stand the Valentine’s Day haters.
You’ve probably also experienced this at some point in real life. I know I have. When I was single, my coupled up friends would smile and give me looks of pity, like they felt so sorry for me that I didn’t have a boyfriend. It was humiliating, awkward and also very smug and annoying. Now that I’m with my boyfriend, my single friends give me those same looks of pity, but this time it’s because they feel bad that I’m not out there “living my life” because I’m tethered to someone else (for the record, I don’t feel that way). However it’s happening, I think we can all agree that it’s incredibly annoying. So why is there this war between singles and couples? Why can’t we all just be like, “Cool, you’re happy single/in a relationship? Me too. Great!”
As it turns out, there’s actually a solid reason behind this. New research shows that the reason we’re always trying to push our relationship status on others is because people in general believe that what they’re doing is the best – in other words, everyone should be doing what they’re doing. Researchers found that this is the most true for people who feel like their status isn’t going to change. You know who I mean – those couples who are confident they will never break up or those single people who swear they’re never going to settle down.
Pretty interesting, right? I think so. And actually, according to LiveScience, “the research is the first to show that both single and coupled people are prejudiced against those who don’t have their same relationship status.” See?! I knew I wasn’t making up this war in my head.
But you know what? I still think it stinks, even if there is a reason behind it. Why can’t single people and people in relationships just get along and be happy for each other? I’m sick of getting a vibe from some of my single friends that they feel sorry for me because I have a boyfriend and can’t always do what I want. Just like I was sick of my friends in relationships feeling superior to me when I was single because they had someone to go home to every night.
So can we all just stop thinking that what we’re doing is the right way to do things and that everyone should be living their lives like we’re living ours? I feel like not only would that solve this singles vs. couples thing we’ve all got going on, but it would also solve many other problems in life. Let’s just agree to look outside our own experiences more, okay?
What do you think – do you feel like there’s tension between singles and couples? Have you ever had a friend feel sorry for you because she has a different relationship status than you? Or do you think singles and couples get along just fine? Tell me in the comments.