It’s happened to all of us: you see a cute guy and you can’t help but wonder about his penis size. What?! It’s totally normal to be curious about the human body! Sheesh.
If you’re curious about how big a guy’s penis is and you have an Android phone, you’re in luck. Because guess what? There’s an app for that. Sigh. I feel like lately, I can say that phrase about pretty much anything.
The app is called The Predicktor (we see what you did there!) and it does exactly what it sounds like: accurately predicks (hehe… couldn’t resist) the penis size of a dude. But don’t get it twisted – this app wasn’t created for curious women who want something to gossip about. It was actually made for dudes. While they can figure out their penis size on their own (I hope), guys apparently spend a lot of time wondering if their penis size is “normal” or not. This app allows them to compare the size of other guys so they can see where they stand. Um… okay.
Here’s how it works: you enter the subject’s height, sexual orientation and finger length into the app and then it uses all kinds of “scientific data” to figure out how big his erect penis is. Am I the only seriously doubting this? First of all, I always thought that the finger/shoe thing was a myth. Second of all, how exactly do you get a dude’s finger length? Go up to him and say, “Hey, mind if I measure your finger? Why? Oh, no reason. Thanks.” I feel like that wouldn’t go over too well.
Also, since when does your sexual orientation affect your penis size? I’m sorry, where exactly is this scientific data coming from?
According to the website and creator, the app isn’t really supposed to be 100 percent accurate. It’s just supposed to give dudes an idea of all the different sizes out there and “soothe the penis-related insecurity, anxiety or dissatisfaction” men are dealing with. Whoa. Honestly, guys, I had no idea penis size was this big of a deal for dudes. Also, if it’s not accurate, how exactly is it supposed to soothe their worries? Oh, and if you’re constantly spending time wondering how big other junk is, wouldn’t that make you more obsessive about it rather than making things better?
I’m going to have to say this app is a sham… I probably wouldn’t waste $3 on it. But hey, this commercial for The Predicktor makes it all worth it. I mean… I can’t explain it. You need to watch it for yourself.
Would you download this app? Do you ever wonder about penis size? How much do you really care about penis size? Tell us in the comments.