It was Miss Taylor Swift who sang the now famous words, “We are never, ever, ever getting back together.” These words have been stuck in my head basically since her song came out. So does Taylor follow her own advice? Well, she’s broken up with Harry Styles, but even as recently as this past weekend, it was reported that Taylor apparently wanted to get back together with Harry while in France.
Let’s be honest – there are always rumors in the celeb world about who is dating or reuniting, so I don’t know if there’s a way to know for sure. In any case, it does bring up an interesting question about whether or not you should give your ex another chance or live by the lyrics of Taylor’s song. I’ll be honest – a lot of times, getting back with an ex may not be a great idea. However, it definitely happens: a new study found that 44 percent of participants between the ages of 17 and 24 have reconciled with an ex.
Here are a few things to think about if you are seriously considering getting back with an ex, as well as a few tips on what to do if you do end up reuniting as a couple.
What's Your Motivation?Is it because you miss your ex or just having a BF? If you really think on it, you may realize that you miss the relationship rather than the person. The problem with that is, if you go back to your ex, you aren’t opening yourself up to experiencing a new type of relationship. If Taylor does want to get back with an ex, only she can really understand the reasons behind it. The same goes for you - it may take a real hard look at yourself to know what you want and why. Source: Pat Denton/WENN.com
What Does He Want?As the saying goes, "It takes two to tango." If your ex seems to be enjoying flirting it up now that he's single, or he has found a new GF, trying to get back together is probably something to let go. Reportedly, Harry wasn't into a Haylor reunion, so if that's similar to your case, I think it's best to avoid forcing an ex reunion. Even if he's still single, if he just seems kind of interested because you are, but not totally invested, it is probs going to be a struggle for you to have an equal relationship. Source: WENN.com
Why Did You Break Up?Break ups happen for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes though, a break up is for a reason beyond your control, like you were both too busy to really spend time together or you didn't want to try long distance. If the circumstances have changed - or at least how you feel about it - that definitely could be a reason to give it another try. However, there are also some reasons for a past break up that you shouldn't ignore... Source: Shutterstock.com
Obey Your Deal BreakersIt upsets me to see Rihanna and Chris Brown back together considering his abusive history toward her. I understand that it can be very difficult to fully remove yourself from a relationship like that, and while I also know people can change, that really takes a lot. Seek out support from others, and figure out what has absolutely no place in your relationships (deal breakers). If your ex has shown those qualities or actions - or has been abusive in any way - I wouldn't get back together. Source: WENN.com
Time Is A FactorRight after a breakup, the desire to get back with an ex might be stronger. Time helps put things in perspective. Have you taken a little time to be single or have maybe dated someone else? If some time has passed, you've had other experiences and you still are having these kind of feelings, it may be something worth revisiting. Source: Shutterstock.com
What Are The Terms?Even if your ex does seem interested, are you both completely on the same page about what "back together" means? For you it could mean dating again, while for him it could mean hooking up. You have every right to have whatever sort of relationship you choose, but make sure you both are on the same page. If you're not, things are only going to get way more complicated and emotional, and that's a lot to put on the line for an ex. Source: Shutterstock.com
Take A Fresh StartDon't rush to pick up right where you both left off. Really think of this as a new relationship. Get to know each other again from the beginning. It will make you less likely to fall into old patterns. Accept that you've both apologized or forgiven whatever happened before, and don't be bringing those things up this second go around. If you don't think you can do that, then getting back together may not be what's best for you. Source: Shutterstock.com
Don't Fall Into Old HabitsSee, we're really serious about the old habits! If you're planning on getting back together, then you need to think even extra hard about avoiding whatever went wrong the first time around. Think of it almost as kind of a cheat sheet since you already know what doesn't work for you two. There's no reason to fall back into poor communication traps if you've both decided to give it another go. Source: Shutterstock.com
Have you (or would you) ever get back together with an ex? Under what conditions? Tell me in the comments!