Most of my friends have boyfriends, but I’m single. I’m happy–I have a ton going on, from work to to performing to baking cookies to just curling up and hanging out with my friends on my couch–and I go on dates pretty often. I just haven’t found the right dude yet. No big deal, right? And I bet a lot of you can relate!
Well, seems like a big deal to my girlfriends. Whenever we’re out, they’re giving me advice on how to find someone. Without my asking, they suggest I sign up for free dating sites, wear miniskirts more often (dude, it was like 15 degrees today–not happening), or offer to set me up. This would be okay and much less annoying if I were one of those people who complains about being single, but I don’t. I like it! Being single is exciting, because it’s like there’s always something new around the corner. There are no limits, and you can do whatever you want to do with your time.
When my friends freak out about me being single, sometimes it can feel like they think there’s something wrong with flying solo. But honestly? That’s their own issue. Don’t get me wrong–they totally mean well and have good intentions! But when people are so desperate to pair others off, it sort of speaks about their own insecurities and fear of being alone. Don’t fall for it!
How to find someone isn’t the problem. I find a lot of people, and a lot of people find me–just some don’t have a spark and a lot of them are jerks. (Kelly Clarkson had the same problem before she met her fiancee!) Finding someone worth my time is the problem. And it’s not even really a problem. I’m a busy girl, and when I find someone worth carving time out for, you bet I will. I’m just pretty happy with my life as it is.
I look at life as a cupcake: My family and friends are the actual cupcake, all moist and gooey and yummy, a solid foundation to work from. My goals are the frosting, sweet and rewarding. I look at romance as sprinkles: They’re awesome, but not necessary to make a delicious dessert.
Much like I view life as a cupcake, I look at dating as a dessert buffet. (Can you tell I have a sweet tooth?) How can I tell what I like the best out of, say, tiramisu, pumpkin pie, red velvet cake, ice cream sandwiches or petit fours if I don’t sample a little of everything first? Once I find a favorite, I’ll be happy to settle down. But until then, I’m content to taste test a few things, and I know that some will give me toothaches or not work so well with my stomach. That’s fine. That’s part of life. But for now, I don’t want to eat the same thing every single day.
Being single doesn’t mean you’re weird. It doesn’t mean that you’re destined to be forever alone. It just means you haven’t met your match yet, and that’s fine. Because you won’t meet him or her if you’re stuck settling with someone else. If you want to know how to find someone awesome? The answer is to be as awesome as you can by yourself. Just let the rest happen!
Do your friends try to get you a boyfriend or girlfriend when you’re single? Do your single friends want boyfriends? Tell us in the comments.