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need2kno123 said:
My boyfriend and I have been dating on and off for eight months. I think we’re past our puppy love stage because lately it’s been more about hanging out than hooking up. He watched TV when we hang out, and says that when I want to cuddle I’m “being clingy.” And I also noticed that I want to have sex more than he does. You know how usually the girls are the ones who make up excuses like, “I’m tired”, “I don’t feel good”, “we already did at an hour ago”? He’s the one making those excuses. Is there something wrong with me? Is there any way to fix this? Help please!!!
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Although it has been almost a year (in 3 weeks!!) for my guy and I, he def wants sex alot more than I do. So I know how you feel. But, we don’t have any of those other problems you are having… We are a very happy couple, so I just think it’s the way he is sometimes. Knowing him and how he can be, I def find this to be true. But, I agree with Guenever. If he wants sex less and you are having other problems, then maybe there is an underlying serious problem. You should def bring this up and talk with him about it.
Nope, I dont think that is weird. I think guys are wrongly portrayed for always wanting sex because I know guys who arent ready. I also think we are wrongly portrayed for not wanting it, we just dont talk about how horny we are to everyone like guys do, but we are just as horny or more depending on the person. We may even be more sexual in some ways than guys are because we not only like to think about sex, we also like to read about it in erotic stories and watch it in erotic videos, where it seems guys only like to watch it.
Oh for… No. No, there is nothing wrong with you for being a girl who wants more sex than the guy she’s with. I can’t believe we still allow the double standard.
What would be wrong is if you were pressuring your partner into sex, or not communicating properly in your relationship. It sounds, for example, like he doesn’t like cuddling as much as you do, so finding a middle ground would be good. This stuff applies regardless of the mixture of sexes in a relationship.
Once again, because I have no way to say this louder, the girl is not ‘supposed’ to always want less sex than the guy. It varies from person to person. Quit stereotyping.
Its totally normal for you to have more sexual desire than your boyfriend. Sometimes my bf has to coerce me into sex but by turning him down multiple times it give me power and when I give it its a power shift into submission. Maybe he’s like that. Some guys like a girl to be aggressive and goes after what she wants sexually.
Alternatively he may not be physically attracted to you as much anymore. Sounds harsh I know but it doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing you guys can focus on the personality and mental and spiritual development.
Lastly he could be just uninterested in sex. He may be going through something. Or he could be cheating and feels bad about having sex with you this is harsh yes but it is a possibility (5%).
Talk about it. Some couple don’t like talking about how they feel about their sex lives for fear that they’ll hurt the other persons feeling. Just be sincere and be mindful of tone and go for it. If nothing he’ll be appreciative of how you approached him about it. Its not always what you say but how you say it <3
It sounds like he may be no longer in to you. While the guy wanting less sex isn’t something weird or unusual, him saying you are being clingy and making excuses sounds a lot more like there is something wrong with the relationship. You should talk to him and get him to be up front about things. Sometimes a guy is just tired… but if it happens on a regular basis, i.e. more often than not, there is probably something up.