Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy were only together for a few months, but the news of their breakup shocked a lot of us. By all accounts, they were totally smitten with one another (and so were their families!). So what happened?
Remember when we warned Taylor a while ago about getting too serious too fast? Rumor has it that’s what’s behind the breakup: Taylor Swift reportedly got clingy with Conor Kennedy and scared him off. A source dished, “Conor’s just an 18-year-old kid and wasn’t ready for anything super serious, but Taylor is looking for her soulmate and it kind of freaked him out with how strong she came on.” The bean-spiller added, “Taylor is obsessed with the Kennedys and was living out a fairytale with Conor. But she was more obsessed with the idea of dating a Kennedy, than the actual Kennedy she was dating.”
That’s bad news bears, ladies. Both people in a relationship may not always realize their feelings at the same time, and if you push too hard to chase someone too much, it’s really, really easy to kill something that could have been great had you just left it be–and thus easy to come across as clingy (as a lot of girls are pegged pretty often). Plus, everyone just wants to be loved for who they are–not what they represent, you know? We’re sure T-Swizzle wouldn’t want to date a guy who just wanted to date her because she’s a celeb (she once explained it as, “You can’t be in love with a Google search”), so apparently the same thing happened here, just the tables were turned.
Of course, being accused of being clingy is nothing new for a lot of girls–we’re romantics! And Taylor may be the most hopeless romantic of all, according to the source: “Taylor is love crazy and loves living vicariously through other people’s love stories. She sincerely wants to find the person that she is supposed to spend the rest of her life with.”
Here’s the thing: Aren’t we all doing that on some level? People love being in love. That’s why romcoms exist, even though you always know the ending. It’s why so many songs (including a lot of Taylor Swift’s) are about it. It’s why Grey’s Anatomy is somehow still on the air. But it’s important to not be in a relationship just because you’re in love with love, or else you end up settling or accidentally sabotaging yourself like Taylor did. The source explained, “Unfortunately, she thinks every man that gives her butterflies is that person.” And that’s where she goes wrong.
It’s super duper important to actually like (and hopefully love) whoever you’re with. It’s important that they treat you well and make you happy, that they fit into your life, and hopefully share an interest or two. When you’re too clingy too soon because you want to dive into a full-fledged relationship, you may not realize that someone isn’t right for you or that they may not be mature enough for something serious. And then what happens? If you’ve convinced yourself that it’s love and that it’s meant to be, you’re bound to get hurt a lot worse than if you’d moved a bit slower and let you and your partner feel one another out at your own respective paces.
Not every crush is going to date you. And not every guy you go on a date with is going to be in or want a relationship with you, and vice versa. And that’s fine! That’s the point: You’re weeding out people who aren’t good enough for you. But if you’re overeager and clingy, you’re a lot less likely to realize that someone is bad news or just bad for you, and you’re a lot more likely to have a broken heart. The best relationships are from a foundation of mutual respect and admiration, not from one of infatuation and obsession with an image or an idea of a romance. Everyone wants to love and be loved, but getting clingy and being in love with love to the point that it blinds you to reality will only make achieving that goal a lot harder.
On the bright side, we’ll probably get a great record from Taylor Swift after all of this. Maybe she’ll name her fifth full-length album “Stage Five.”
Do you think Taylor Swift comes across as clingy in her relationships? Who do you think Taylor Swift should date next? Have you ever been accused of being clingy with guys? Tell us in the comments!