How To Tell Your Parents You Have A Boyfriend

telling your parents you have a boyfriend

She probs just wants to see you happy! | Source: Shutterstock

You met somebody. Somehow through the magic of time and space, you like him and he likes you. Now, he’s your boyfriend. Whoo hoo!

All that’s left is for you to take things to the next step. No, we don’t mean THAT. We’re talking about meeting the parents. That’s right; he’s going to meet the beautiful weirdos who created you, but before you go THERE you’re going to have to tell them about him first. So how do you make this a positive experience and avoid freaking them out? Naturally, I’ve got some tips.

1. DO think about who to tell first.
You may be closer to one parent. If this is your first boyfriend (and they’ve said you’re too young to date) or some other situation that could be drama-filled, it helps to have an advocate on your side while you tell the other parent.

If there are no extenuating circumstances like, “Mom, he needs to stay here until his educational Visa comes through,” then telling the ‘rents together is ideal. This way, no one feels left out.

2. DON’T lead with the stuff they might see as negatives.
There’s something about him that may be an issue. It’s no biggie to you but it will be to your folks. Maybe he’s older or of a different religion or from another background. Cool, but don’t let that be your opening statement. Let them register that you have a boyfriend first. Then give them the caveats.

bad boyfriend picture

This is NOT the pic to show mom and dad! | Source: Shutterstock

3. DO have a photo ready.
Show them a pic of your new BF. A snapshot of him solo works just fine. It’ll help humanize the mystery guy so that they can stop imagining some scary dude stealing their li’l girl.

Note: A simple smiling shot of your cutie is best. Sexy selfies or pictures of the two of you hugged up can be saved for another time, like Neverary.

4. DON’T spring him on them.
Parents are not big on surprises where your romantic life is concerned. Trust your personal love coach on this one. Showing up with a random, unexpected guy has more potential for failure than success.

5. DO share what you know about him and his family.
Be polite without freaking out if they have a zillion questions. Remember, these people used to change your diapers. It’s natural for them to feel bittersweet about you growing up. They may still see you as their baby. Cut them some slack.

Now what?
Family dinners are a common first time meeting moment but can be very stressful. A great alternative is telling them that he’ll drop by to spend a short time on his way to somewhere. This way, there’s a built in out. An hour or two at most is a safe amount of time for a first visit.

Visualize the future: You love him, your parents love him and he didn’t even mind when your little brother kicked him in the shins. YAY. Really hoping this all goes super well for you!

Have you told your parents about a boyfriend? Was it weird? Was it hard? Tell us what happened in the comments!

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  • Alma Salinas

    my name is Alma Salinas and I have a boyfriend but no one in my family knows about him I love him a lot and I have already kissed him multiple times without no one knowing I really wanna tell my grandparents bc I don’t have a mom or dad anymore but I really want them to know I’m scared as to what they’ll do please help

  • Kitty

    I’m 13, almost 14, and my mom and dad are currently in the divorce process and so my mom wants to be single forever and she has said that i prob shouldnt date at my age but I’m dating a 14 year old so it’s less than a year of age difference. I don’t know if she is going to accept that im dating at an early age (and my siblings have never dated anybody and theyre 16 and 20) So I’m really scared about telling her about my bf… I’m in illinois and he’s in wisconsin and were about 3 hours away and I don’t know if she will accept a boyfriend I didn’t meet in real life but I met him through my online friends and my brothers will make fun of me for dating someone online for sure. My parents are also indian so they arn’t used to dating since in India they just have arranged marriages so I’m scared they will want to meet him in real life before having a relationship and my mom is really worried about me ever getting sexually harrassed or that I’m sending nudes online. Please tell me what I should do I honestly don’t know!

  • bonnie

    hi i am 13 and i just started dating this guy from school. he is just under a year older than me and he asked me out. i said yes. i told my mum right away but i haven’t told my dad yet. me and my boyfriend have had one date and are planning our second. i don’t know how to tell my dad, as he can be quite overprotective sometimes. i think my boyfriend and dad will get along fine, but i really don’t know. how can i tell my dad i have a boyfriend/introduce them? any advise would be awesome. thanks

  • JayJay

    Hi, im 17 years old and i just started college and ive been with my bf for about 2 year and he wants me to my parents about us i told him that i need to wait until i started college to talk with them now that i have im really scared of wat they are going to tell me like i shouldnt be with him because im to young or something like that please i really need so help i dont want to loss him over something like this

  • Hannah

    Hi, I’m 14 and I have a boyfriend. He’s my first boyfriend. He’s really sweet and funny. He would never do anything to hurt me. We have only been dating for about 4 weeks. The problem is, idk how to tell my mom or if I should even tell her. I mean we’re not that serious or anything. We really like each other but we don’t love each other. We’ve gone a couple places together. My mom has never really talked to me about when I’m allowed to have a boyfriend and I don’t want to get in trouble for having a boyfriend. If I do tell her, how do I tell her without it being awkward? Both of our mom’s know we hang out sometimes and they’re fine with it. But we walk at the park sometimes and I tell my mom that I’m hanging out with one of my friend’s that’s a girl. I feel like I’ll slip up soon and want to stop lying to her because it’s like a federal crime in my family if you are caught lying. One of the reasons I haven’t told her yet is because I don’t want her teasing me or him. Please help! I don’t know what to do. How do I tell her? Should I even tell her?

    • Eleanor Burrowes

      You don’t need to tell her if u don’t want to it’s ur relationship not hers

  • Caitlyn

    Im nearly 13 and ive had a boyfriend but that was ages ago, and I’ve recently got a new boyfriend and I dont know what to say to my parents. I know they’ll be fine with it. Its just what to say. Thanks for any adivce 🙂

  • shyanddepressed

    Hey…im 19 in college n has a bg he’s 20 now we met in my 1st year of college n were still together now we both in love n I’ve met his parents and i like them alot…the problem is my parents doesnt know aany off this…n me n my bf doesnt see each other much only during school. This is A problem bciz summer is coming n im gonna sad n depressed dat i cant be with him…my parents well mother doesnt allow to go anywhere with friends or nothing n when i do go out i have to be with a family memeber i wanna tell my mother that i have a bf but i dont know how to tell and theirs no reasoning with her and she’s gunna yell n demand that i break up with him but thats not happening…she’s still treating me like a child…my dad doesnt get hiself involved and i dont have a connection to him…how do i change this…help?

  • P756

    Hey I really need help I’m 15 , my boyfriend wants to go on a date but I have strict parents n I don’t know how to tell them I have a bf

  • Julia

    Okay so I need some advice. I started dating this guy that I been in LOVE with for three years, we started dating two months ago and he wants to hang out outside of school. I am 13 and the issue is that my mom said I could date but she is going to “check into” the parents backgrounds before I’m allowed to date him. This boys father has done some bad things and he doesn’t live with him anymore, but I am very worried that my mom is going to freak out and say that I cannot date him. Please help!

  • Destiney

    Hi, I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost two months. we met through an online schooling program so i know his identity is legit. My parents know i am talking to him, but as far as they know he is just a ‘crush’. How do i tell them that we are together? We have made future plans, he wants to go into music and I want to go into Air Force. We are both very supportive of each other. He is 16 and i am 15. There is literally only 13 months difference between our ages. We’ve never done anything sexual or anything like that, but I still want my parents to know about him. They don’t like me having guy friends, but they do allow me to talk to some. How should i tell them?

  • Kiki Thorne

    hey I’m 17 I’m going to be Eighteen in two days.I have been in a relationship for a year now n I have know my bf for six years.he four years older than me.he took me to meet this parents which was nice now he wants me to tell my mom abt him on my bday which is two days from now .she’s very overprotective.n I don’t know how to tell her dice this will be the first time.I told her abt him as a friend n she didn’t like the jod he does which is a computer technician.she wants me to have some Rich guy .how do I tell her.I need of urgent advice

  • Tori

    So when I was in 5th or 6th grade I started hanging out with this guy. We were pretty good friends and we’ve always talked on and off. About a week or so after school ended this year (I’m going into 9th grade) he texted me at midnight asking me if I was awake. We texted until 4:30 in the morning around three am he asked me out I said sure. My problem is that the only way I can explain my dad when it comes to dating is bipolar because one minute he’s telling me I can’t date until I’m 40 the. The next he’s telling me “I need to acknowledge the opposite gender.”
    How do I tell my dad I have a boyfriend
    Ps we’re the same age and he’s my first boyfriend

  • Elizabeth Vasquez

    Umm hi.. there’s this guy that I met on social media he’s really sweet & cute I wanna go out with him but I’m scared that I might get hurt like in my last relationship, I was going out with this guy who lied to me saying he was 15 when he really is 13 & this guy that I’m talking to says he’s 16 should I believe him ?????

  • Bailey

    Hey, I could really use some help, not as much as some people on here but I still do so I will take any advise I can get. So I have just started dating this boy at school, we are both 15. I need help because all my friends know, but I can’t seem to find a way to let my parents know. My mom will probably be more thrilled than concerned, but it’s my dad on the other hand I’m worried about. He is super protective of me and even if a say a guy on TV is cute he gives me the look. I don’t want my dad to be mad at me or my BF so I want to tell him soon, but I have no clue on how to go about doing so. Please help and I will take any advise I can get!

  • $145720508

    Okay for any of you that need advice stop here and read.I’m 11 and I was dating a guy who was the same age as me.We knew each other and were in the same grade at the same school.We’ve been dating for 6 months since March, secretly and it was kinda hard and kinda easy equally.It was the same as most of your situations because his parents knew and were totally fine with it,but my parents don’t know at all what’s so ever.We had friends who helped us keep the secret,but I should’ve told them.I think all of you guys who are scared to tell your parents should because you’ll never feel right not doing it.You might think it’s silly taking advice from an 11 year old,but yeah I know my stuff.If you’re wanting to tell,but don’t know how or when ask your friends when they’re available and ask them to be by your side to support you.Also I recommend doing it when you’re all happy and having a good time because they wouldn’t want to ruin the moment.Also we are just friends for the betterment and we are very young still!!!If you need more information watch iiisuperwomaniii video about how to tell your parents bad news,it’s funny and will help get through your situation,Hope This Helped You Through Your Situation😄😄😄😁😁😁!!!

  • Trisha

    Ok, im 13 years old and my boyfriend is 16, but we love each other a whole lot, i want him to meet my mom and my dad but, im afraid that they will get mad because im younger then him. My mom always says ”If i find out this boy was at ur friends house, you will be grounded for a whole year” & I went to my friends and he came over, he was so sweet, and im not ever telling my mom. But yet my mom will let my brother and sister hang out with the boyfriends and girlfriends. My dad will kill me if they find out im dating him. I need advice on what to do because, i want to see him in person more often… HELP

    • Kenzie

      That’s a really tough situation. I would have a serious talk with your parents. Sit them down and tell them the truth. Tell them what has been happening and your feelings about it. Then say I honestly like this guy a lot and can’t change how I feel about him. Also tell them that you can do whatever so me but that won’t stop my feelings for this guy. (hope this helps you).. (:

  • Cassidy

    So I have had a boyfriend for a little over a year and I’m madly in love with him! he has done some things to hurt me and obviously my parents don’t approve now. They saw on Facebook that we are back together and I don’t know how to talk to them about it. They are very protective and don’t like him at all.

  • Ko

    Hi, Basically i’ve been with this guy for around a month or so, and I really really love him! He’s treated me better than anyone else ever has, always has little presents when he comes to see me, gives me all his passwords, always talking to me, taking care of me blah blah blah.. actually perfect! everything you could want in a lad! the problem is.. my parents found out around a week ago, and they’ve taken my phone off me and everything, even pick me up from school. They do this because I am from a cultural background where having a boyfriend is seen as socially unacceptable.. :/ What do I doo?? btw his mum knows and she was totally fine with it, even though he has the same sorta background as me.. x

    • Trisha

      since his mom is fine with it, maybe you can talk to his mom. and maybe she can talk to your mom about the relationship.